I open my legs for him and he slides his middle finger between my lips, up and inside me. Ooohhhhhh God That. Feels. So Good, I am...
“Lauren” He whispers right in my ear and I jump “You. Feel. So Good”
Fuck.... He can read my mind!
I can feel his erection pushing into the small of my back as he pulls me tighter up against him and pushes another finger inside me. We are both naked, standing on his second floor veranda. If anyone was to look up through the trees from the beach, they might, possibly, be able to see us. But at this stage, I really couldn't care less, what has this man done to me? I give an involuntary shudder, I'm not sure if it’s the cold or excitement. I feel so, wanton, so absolutely turned on, my whole body is tingling. Feeling the tremors run through me, he stops what he's doing and puts his arms around me and says, “Get into the spa, it's warm in there and getting cold out here now the suns gone down, mind your step”
He holds my hand as we step down into the warm water together. It is heaven, Gabe hits a button and the bubbles start, he passes me my glass. God, I need a drink. This is so intense. I have had sex with only three men in my life and two of them were over 27 years ago, what I'm about to do here is massive, life changing, I don't think I was this nervous when I lost my virginity!
We sit facing each other, our heads leaning back on the padded headrests, drinking our wine and despite the intensity of the moment and this giant step I am about to take with my life, I can't help but close my eyes and enjoy a moment of total relaxation. Adele is singing in the background. I love her voice, 21 has been my album of choice these past months and hearing her tonight is like having a friend beside me, giving me confidence, reassuring me that I am doing the right thing. I look up at the stars and stare. The Australian night sky has always fascinated me. I was born and lived in London until I was thirteen and was not impressed with my parents decision to move here, dragging me away from all my friends and a life that I truly loved. I had defied them at every opportunity in the first few months we lived here and would sneak out of the house and lay in the garden and look up at the stars at night, they were my constant, my thing that I still had in common with my friends I had to leave behind, the moon, the stars, they were the same ones my mates were looking at. I would lie there, plotting revenge on my parents for ruining my life and planning on running away back to England as soon as I could get the money together for my air fare but all the while fascinated by the fact you could see the Milky Way with the naked eye. Something that wasn't possible with all the light pollution in London. Seeing my first ever shooting star, only a few nights after getting here was a memory I would treasure forever. I took great comfort from it, imagining it was a sign, telling me everything was going to be alright.
I let out a long sigh, not from stress but from pure contentment. Right at this very moment, I am sure have made the right decision, tomorrow, is another day and I might think differently but right here, right now, wherever things go with Gabe, leaving Jason was the right thing to do, I am now absolutely convinced but I still can’t help being nervous about taking this final step, sleeping with another man, fucking hell, am I really going to do this? And, there is something else that's been bothering me and as embarrassing as it is I need to discuss it with him.
“You okay, would you like some more wine?” He asks interrupting my thoughts, I look across at him. What a beautiful interruption, his hair is damp and pushed back off his face, he's standing up in the spa, leaning over to pick up the wine bottle out of the cooler, the water starts just at the end of his happy trail and as he leans over, I get a glimpse of his left bum cheek. There's nothing about the way this man looks, that I don't love. Like, I mean like not love, no, not love. I don't know him, so I can't love him. I really like him as a person and he is mighty fine to look at. That is as far as it goes. Oh apart from the fact that I also desperately want to have sex with him. That's all there is, no more. But first I need to have 'The conversation’
He stands in front of me and tops up first my glass, then his own. His skin is glistening and I want so badly to touch him. As he sits back down he catches me watching, just as I lick my top lip. Busted I think to myself.