I jump and drop my coffee cup as my phone vibrates in my pocket and I’m suddenly, once again reminded of my surroundings as the sights, sounds and smells of the hospital invade my senses… Shit, was I dreaming all of that? It felt so real, like I was there, back to that night and Lauren was there, with me, awake and smiling that sad smile she had when I first met her, sad but full of life, not like now, now she’s lying unconscious, half an hour away in a hospital bed and it’s all my fault, if I hadn’t fallen just a little bit in love with her that first night and completely in love with her over just a few short days after that first night, then she would never have been on that Jet Ski, she would never have been knocked unconscious, she would be safe and happy and living her life and I would be living mine, still oblivious to what it’s like to be in love, to want and need to be around someone every day, to touch them, to smell them; I hate being apart from her, even when we are both at home, I hate being in another room from her, ten feet and a few walls is just too much distance… and when she gets through this, I swear on my life that I will let her know every single day what she means to me, how she’s rocked my world, how she saved me from just existing and showed me how to live and love, if I could swap places with her, I would do it in a heartbeat, she has been through so much already…My phone vibrates again, this time it’s in my hand so I manage to answer the private number before it rings off.
“Mr Wilde?”
“Speaking.”
“This is Meagan North, one of Lauren’s Nurses; we need you to get to the hospital as soon as possible. Mr Wilde – are you there?”
LAUREN
CHAPTER 13
I’m vaguely aware of a floating sensation and a very loud noise, voices all around me, but none that I recognise; my eyes won’t open and my head aches and I feel very sleepy, I let myself drift away again.
Next thing I think that I remember are more voices but again, I don’t know who they belong to, I force my eyes to open but the light is so bright it hurts my eyes and my head, someone takes hold of my hand.
“Lauren, baby open your eyes.”
I try, I really try but it’s like I’m being dragged down a tunnel, a long, black tunnel, I don’t want to go, I want to go where it’s light and I can feel and smell, where I can hear that voice saying my name, but I can’t, I just can’t hold on and everything just slips and slides into blackness again.
The alarm goes off and I lie still for a minute, I haven’t had an alarm that sounded like that for years, actually, I don’t think I have ever had an alarm that bleeped like that. Shit, is that the smoke alarm, fuck, where are the kids, where’s Jason? I open my eyes, wide, the room is far too bright and I squint, I sit up as the bleeping grows louder. God my head hurts, where the fuck am I and what the fuck am I wearing, I know I love my fluffy jarmies with cows and pigs on them but there is no effing way I would wear a nightie like this thing. I look around the room, oh my god, I’m in hospital. The bleeps are coming from the machines I’m hooked up to, why am here? Where’s…Fuck.
“GABE!!!!” I scream as loud as I can but my throat is dry and scratchy, I get out of bed and I instantly hit the floor as my legs give way.
I am in a complete and utter blind panic, all I can think to do is call his name, again and again. The door flies open and there are nurses everywhere, trying to sooth me, putting me back into bed, I am sobbing, beyond hysterical now
“Gabe, where’s Gabe, what happened, why am I here, Let go of me, where is he?”
I’m actually lashing out now as they try and hold me down.
“Someone better tell me what the fuck is going on, nowwwww!”
They shove a needle into the cannula in my arm and I can feel myself slipping away within about thirty seconds, not before I manage to smack a male nurse right under the jaw. Shit, who put my arm in a cast?
I don’t know how long it is before I start to wake up again but this time I’m a little more calm, I know I’m in the hospital, I know my arm is in a cast, I just don’t know why, and where is Gabe, Oh God, where is Gabe? I can smell him and I close my eyes and dream of his hands on me and the sound of his voice. Something brushes my lips.
“Lauren, its Gabe, it’s okay baby, open your eyes.”
My eyes fly open as I realise I’m not dreaming, it’s really him, he’s really here.
I lift my eyelids to meet his beautiful blue eyes, but instead I’m met but a very different pair of eyes, they’re Gabe’s but they are different – grey and bloodshot, he looks terrible.
“Hey baby, you scared me there for a while.”
He’s crying, why is he crying?
All I can manage is “Gabe” and then I burst into tears.
“What happened, why am I here? I was so scared, I think I hit the nurse, I’m so sorry, where were you?”
He climbs up on the bed and holds me; I’m disconnected from all the machines now so he has easier access. I bury my face in his chest as he holds me tightly to him, one arm around my shoulders, the other stroking my hair.
“What happened?” I look up at him, I can feel his body tense underneath me.
His eyes dart between my eyes, my lips, all over my face, he pulls me in and kisses my hair. “Fuck Lauren, fuck,” now he’s crying hard and I’m so scared, I can’t remember, what happened.
“Gabe please, you’re scaring me, what’s wrong, what happened? Please tell me.”
I turn around as best I can with only one arm for leverage and in the end decide the only way I can see his face properly is to straddle him but the room spins as I try to move so I take my time. He’s crying softly as he finally looks up at me.
“What do you remember about Saturday?”
“Saturday, I don’t understand, I don’t…Saturday?”
“We were up at the lake.”
“Shit yeah Saturday, we were on the water, on the Jet Ski’s. Shit Gabe what happened?”
I remember it all now, we were out on the water and going to head back in for a quickie while the house was still quiet. What day is it now then? Before I can ask a door opens and a nurse comes in.