Our Chance (Chance Series #2)

“And such a smooth talker.”


“Now that I would never claim. Apparently I say fuck a lot.”

“No,” I said sarcastically, faking shock.

He held his hands up and tilted his head. “So, what’re you going to do about Damon, Miss Presley?”

I bit my lip and wrapped my hands around the mug. “I want us to be official but I don’t want to jump into the huge commitments, we’re going slow.”

“Where’s the problem with that?”

“Well… He broke things off with me before because I didn’t want anything serious so what if what I can offer right now still isn’t enough?”

“Have you spoken to him about what he wants?”

“Not recently.” He said he was cool with slow. “I hurt him a lot and I think he’s still healing from that. I don’t want to keep bringing it up. He wants us to be official, I know that much, but what if he’s wanting to move in together or… I don’t know.”

“That’s not something I can answer, but Damon can. I’m willing to bet my house on him being okay to take things slow for as long as you need. You’re already giving him everything by opening up enough to properly let him in. He’s not going to push you.”

I knew all this. Damon was amazing and he would never try to push me past what I was ready for but because of his ditching me, I was second-guessing the things I already knew. Shit, I hated being in this situation. I did not have nearly enough sympathy for Chloe while she was agonising over her feelings for Logan. One minute I was sure and the next my head was all over the place.

“Why can’t things ever be straight forward?” I asked.

“Ah, the million dollar question. Want to know my theory?” I nodded. I’d take anything right now. “Life’s a bitch.”

I deadpanned. “That’s it?”

“That’s about the best you’re likely to get. Life is a constant battle, there’s far too much to ever understand. No one will be able to have everything straight. Hold onto the things you know. Like your feelings for Damon. You love him, Nell, so focus on that and the rest won’t be quite as much of a headfuck.”

That’s what he thought. Loving Damon was the headfuck. Not loving him would be easy. But stopping was impossible. I wanted to pour the boiling coffee over my head.

“How long did it take you to know that you wanted to have a go at things with Chlo?”

He leant back against the worktop. “About five minutes after meeting her.”

“Come on. After you thought Jace had died. How long?”

Blowing out a deep breath like I’d just asked him to tell me the meaning of life, he put his drink down. “About a month after I dragged her arse up out of bed. She’d spent too long not existing after we thought he’d died. When we started hanging out more and she was looking like she’d joined the world of the living, I knew. I don’t remember exactly when or how long, I was too busy beating myself up about it. I thought my little brother was dead and I still couldn’t stop wanting his girlfriend.”

“But that was a while before all the what-the-fuck-should-I-do stuff.”

He dipped his head in a nod. “It was complicated. I thought I could ignore it the way I’d done for too many years before. When I started to realise she was having feelings for me too, I knew there was no way I could stop it. But I was ahead of her, I’d dealt with the guilt for longer, come to terms with more. Chloe was just starting and I remember how fucking awful you feel at first. I had to give her time. Is that what you need?”

“I’m not sure if there’s enough time in the world that would help me come to get a grip on what happened and trying to not repeat it.” Time wasn’t what I needed, it was courage. Taking a leap of faith was scary, but necessary. I didn’t want to be stood still, hiding anymore. I had to trust Damon and myself.

“I don’t think you’re right there. You already know what you don’t want to be and you’ve been taking steps to avoid that for years. Now you just have to work out how to continue avoiding that with someone.”

“We argue.”

“Who doesn’t?”

“Fine,” I said, narrowing my eyes and then sighing. “Fine, I know. I’m being an idiot.”

“You are,” he replied, picking his drink up. “Stop being a dick and talk to him. My sex life depends on this!”

Leaning back I laughed and wiggled my eyebrows. But I would talk to Damon.





Damon




It had been six weeks since Nell’s mum died and she was doing well. Even though she was only with me for a few days I’d got used to her being there and now I didn’t like being alone. How the fuck can you miss someone that wasn’t even with you for one week?

As well as those first few nights she’d also crashed at mine or had me stay at hers a couple of times when she’s had a real hard day dealing. That hadn’t happened in the last week though, so things were looking up.