With a smile and a nod he turned around and left. I think he saw a little of his young self in me. He’d said a few times that we had the same drive and determination. Right now I bet he was regretting taking me on and giving me the responsibilities I had right out of Uni.
I pulled myself together long enough to put an hour of decent work in and then I left an hour and a half early. Rich had already gone but I knew it wouldn’t be a problem – he’d offered after all.
Taking the steps down to ground floor two at a time, I prayed no one would stop me to chat. I’d not been here long but most of the people that worked in the building were very friendly. Right now I wanted cold beer and easy women.
Driving home was quicker out of rush hour. I come to a crossroads and wanted to turn right to Nell’s but I forced myself to go left. Running back to her wouldn’t do any good. She would probably just tell me to do one anyway. I hated that we were both in very different places right now. Why couldn’t I have met her years on when she’d dealt with whatever was holding her back? Why couldn’t I suck it up and stick it out until that’d happened?
I pulled into my drive and a surprise was sitting in a car next to mine. “Steph?” I said, getting out at the same time as she left her silver Mini. “What’re you doing here?”
“I beat your brother. He’s meeting me here in about twenty minutes.”
“That doesn’t answer my question,” I said, slamming the door shut.
“Lance and Ivory are coming so we can cheer you up, obviously. I’m sorry about what happened with Nell.”
Shrugging one shoulder, I locked my car and lifted my chin towards my house. Steph followed, her high silver heels clicking on the concrete floor. “You guys didn’t have to come all the way here, I’m doing fine.”
“Being honest here, you don’t look fine, Damon. You look like shit.”
“Thank you, Stephanie,” I said over my shoulder as I let us into my flat.
I knew I did. Sleep abandoned me for most of last night. I’d lain awake for hours playing over my conversation and goodbye with Nell. My bed felt too big and I couldn’t sleep on my side since she’d claimed it.
If this was what everyone went through after breaking up with someone they loved, then I didn’t understand why people took the chance again with someone new. Then I realised that perhaps that was how Nell felt. Had something happened before me? She’d not mentioned a guy but why would she? Chloe would know though, surely?
“Do you want a drink?” I asked, flicking the kettle on so I could make a strong coffee before going out.
“I’d love a tea, thanks.”
“So what’s the grand plan then? How are you lot cheering me up?”
“Well,” she said, taking an apple from the almost empty fruit bowl and spinning it in her hand. “We planned to surprise you, get you fed on takeaway curry, and then get you hammered at a club.”
“Sounds very similar to what I was going to do anyway.”
“Yes, but now you don’t have to be quite as pathetic since you won’t be doing it alone.”
“Compliments just keep rolling in with you, don’t they?” I said sarcastically, leaning against the worktop.
“Do you want to talk about what happened with Nell?”
“Nope.”
She rolled her eyes. “It helps to talk things through.”
“Didn’t with her.”
“Are you sure you can’t work it out? There’s not much you can’t work through if you both want to.”
Raising my eyebrows, I shook my head. “Won’t happen. The only way we could go back to the way it was is if I settle for casual sex.”
“Most men would love that,” she said bitterly.
“I used to love it. Things change. People grow. People who aren’t Nell that is.”
“Whoa,” she said. “That came from a bad place, you’re not usually like that.”
“Sorry, I don’t take rejection well.” That wasn’t true. This wasn’t the first time I’d been rejected, but it was the first time I was rejected by someone I loved, someone I wanted more than anything else in the world. Yeah, that was harsh and it made me harsh.
“You’ll be okay, Damon, we’ve all had our hearts broken before. What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger, remember that.”
Like that bullshit was going to help. I knew I wasn’t going to keel over just because Nell didn’t want me, but that didn’t mean I was okay. Fuck, I was sick of thinking about it all the time.
“You got any single friends?”
“Damon…”
“What, you want me to move on so help.”
“Rebound isn’t moving on.”
“Of course it is. Rebound is the first stage.”
She shook her head. “If you think I’m letting you use one of my friends like that you’re seriously mistaken. Sort yourself out.”
Grabbing the JD out of the cupboard, I took a swig from the bottle. She was right, getting into another casual sex situation with someone else was a fucking stupid idea. There was no way I wanted history to repeat itself.
“Fine. I’m sorry, okay.”
She sighed, put the apple down and grabbed the bottle from my hand. “Lance and Ivory will be here soon.”