“Take it to the parking lot,” Joker says, drinking his coffee. “Don’t come back until you’ve sorted out your shit.”
Sharpie moves fast and furious. His round frame is out the door first. Pax strolls casually after him. The fucker even gives me a wink on his way out.
After Pax is gone, Joker looks at me. “Darby says Shay hasn’t been home in days. She’s still alive, right?”
“Dropped her off before coming here.”
Lucky smirks. “Jenn heard from Lupe that you took Shay and Pax out for a double date last night. Next time, bring someone for your brother. It’ll seem less pathetic that way.”
Laughing, I look outside where Pax uses Sharpie’s ponytail to drag him around the parking lot. Whenever Sharpie breaks free, Pax jumps on him and goes slap crazy. I’m surprised he’s playing nice after how grumpy he was this morning. Pax might be maturing, though I doubt it.
“You and Pax burn Paro and who ever else is behind Tiny’s murder,” Joker says. “I don’t care how you do it. Just remember to get some fucked up shit on your phone to make Wanda feel better.”
Nodding, I glance at Pax strutting back into the restaurant. “We’ll get it done and we’ll make a mess.”
Pax sits down and grins. “Sharpie decided he wanted to go home and fix his ponytail.”
The guys around me grin. Even on edge, everyone breathes easier without Trigger around. His absence is only temporary. Joker knows this fact more than anyone, explaining why he remains on edge despite his smiles. Clearly, being the workhouse behind the big man ain’t exactly living the dream.
28
Shay
Tightly Held Fantasies
Darby and Jenn smile at me when I enter the house. They glance knowingly at each other then return to drinking coffee. Leaving them to share their inside joke, I go upstairs and take a shower.
The hot water feels wonderful on my chilled skin, but I hate washing away Ford’s scent. After I get out, I find a clean tee and jeans before sliding his long sleeve shirt over my head. I don’t care if I look like a loser falling for a guy like Ford. The fucker smells great and I miss him and I want to wear his damn shirt.
After putting a load of laundry into the wash, I find Darby and Jenn still talking in the living room.
“Need an ice pack?” Jenn says, throwing her blonde hair back and laughing.
Darby grins. “We were becoming concerned for your safety. Talked to Joker this morning to see if he knew about a shallow grave with your name on it.”
“Why would he kill me?” I ask from the kitchen while pouring a cup of coffee. “I’m amazing.”
They’re laughing when I return and sit in a chair near the front window. Sighing, Darby taps her red nails on the pink coffee cup.
“I’ve never seen one of the Reed boys spend so much time with one girl. Maybe he’s sick.”
“Uh, amazing, remember?” I say, pointing at myself.
“True. I’m just surprised.”
Jenn snorts. “The wise one here is beyond being surprised anymore.”
Grinning, I sip my coffee then eye Jenn. “Why did you tell people I’m Lucky’s kid?”
“Aren’t you?”
“No and you know that.”
“Oh, maybe you are,” Jenn says, waving her hand around. “Who knows? His dick got around before I claimed it.”
Darby sets her coffee cup aside. “People already think you are. This story about you being his kid stops the questions and makes you club family. Solves a lot of problems. Just roll with it.”
“I actually wish I had a dad like Lucky, so the lie works for me.”
“Yeah, he’s a good man,” Jenn says. “You know, despite all his bad habits and annoying qualities.”
“Ain’t love grand?” Darby asks.
“What are your plans today?” Jenn asks me.
“I’m having lunch with a girl I met at work. Ford is picking me up for dinner then taking me to the hotel.”
“Don’t give your heart to him, Shay,” Darby says softly. “Ford won’t keep it safe. No one ever kept his heart safe growing up and he doesn’t know how to treat anyone any better. It’s not his fault he’s not a good man, but it’ll be your fault if you expect him to be one.”
Darby’s words cut into me. Though she’s protecting me and probably right, I want Ford and he wants me. We’ve embraced the fantasy. Now, Darby is selling reality and the truth hurt.
“We’re just having fun,” I say, thinking about how much I miss him. “I’ve never met a guy like Ford and he likes the chase.”
Darby nods then shoots a look at Jenn who also looks unconvinced. “We’re heading to the mall tomorrow. You should come with us and enjoy a girls’ day out.”
“That would be great.”
Jenn studies me. “You only get the one life. Have fun with Ford while you can and don’t worry about the small stuff.”
My cool exterior must be cracking because I see pity in Jenn’s eyes. Perceptive like my mom never was, she know I’m in too deep with Ford.
29
Ford