Damaged and the Bulldog (Damaged #6)
Bijou Hunter
Chapter One ~ Winnie
At nineteen, I had three distinct memories from my childhood. The first was playing Star Wars with the neighborhood kids and ending up as Chewbacca when the other girl got to be Princess Leia. The second was when the neighborhood bully Clyde Dinkle crashed his bike into my leg while I was riding my Big Wheelie. The last was when my dad announced he’d lost me in a card game and I was going to live with a guy named Sugar Bum.
My therapist said I suppressed my ugliest memories to survive. Eventually, my mind hid them automatically. My short term memory wasn’t great either. I never minded the large gaps in my life though. Based on what I did remember, I wasn’t missing much.
I lived with the scars from my time with Sugar Bum and the Vandals Motorcycle Club. The physical ones like the gash on my hairline, the burns on my feet, and the C-section incision under my belly button provided proof of a time I didn’t remember. Other scars remained hidden in my mind, waiting to rise up inside me. When someone touched me or came up behind me too quickly, I felt under attack. My body remembered even if my mind destroyed the images belonging to the sensations.
Everything changed for me so quickly. One day, I was a doll in a box. The next day, I was in the loving home of Tad and Toni Todds. They were my dad and mom who would never sell me to pay a debt. My unspoken prayers answered, I was saved by men as frightening as the ones who broke me. I still remembered the look on Kirk Johansson’s hard face when he opened the footlocker to find me inside. My savior was terrifying, but he freed me.
These days, I ought to be happy and sane. I had a great family and years of therapy. My past still clung to me. For my family, I wanted to be strong. I also had dreams about a particular man. If I could find a way to be independent, I might have a chance with Dylan Campbell.
The first time I saw Dylan, his mohawk and tats scared me. His dark eyes were so angry. I figured he would hurt me like so many other men. Dylan wasn’t like them, but I took awhile to realize this fact. I knew he wasn’t simply another handsome guy like Cooper or Vaughn when I saw a tanned and sweaty Dylan without his shirt.
I’d never found a man sexy before. Viewing a guy as sexy, rather than handsome, made me think of sex and I hated being touched. I couldn’t even imagine kissing a guy without wanting to vomit. Yet when I saw Dylan without his shirt, my body flushed with heat. For the first time in my life, I was aroused by the sight of a man. My desire not only surprised me, but also scared me to death.
I got the worst giggles when I saw Dylan without his shirt. Embarrassed and aroused, I wouldn’t shut up until Harlow pulled me outside and I downed an entire bottle of water. After calming, I said the stupidest thing ever.
“He has hair on his chest.”
Harlow burst into giggles and I realized how pathetic I sounded.
“Oh, don’t be sad,” Harlow said, hugging me. “Everyone thinks someone’s hot.”
“Do you think someone’s hot?” I mumbled against her.
“Yeah, sure,” she lied.
“Who?”
“Vaughn.”
Even knowing she was lying, I appreciated the effort. Harlow’s hugs felt good. One day, I might enjoy a man touching me. Well, assuming the man was Dylan.
Every morning for months, I woke up and wondered if I should talk to Dylan again. We had shared a few short conversations when I went with Mom to Cooper’s future office. She designed the layout while Dylan ran the construction team. One time, he even said my hair looked nice in a braid. I’d smiled like an idiot, unable to even thank him. Despite his dark angry eyes, Dylan always spoke with a gentle tone when addressing me. I thought he liked me the way guys liked girls, but he never made me feel dirty.
I had hoped he might ask me out. Feeling stronger than I’d ever been, I was ready to give dating a chance. My hopes died when the Devils MC showed up to grab Harlow. They took me too. I wished I fought them off, but I shut down like I always did when afraid. Harlow kicked one and tried to hit another, but they were too strong.
When the armed Devils arrived, the men at the worksite ran for cover. All except Dylan who attacked the two Devils with a hammer. He nearly tore out one guy’s eye before the second bastard shot him in the chest.