“I like it here,” she said.
Based on the fear in her voice, Winnie was lying. I didn’t blame her for disliking the sterile apartment. On more than one occasion, I’d stopped at one of those decorating places like Hobby Lobby. I wanted to give my apartment character, but nothing clicked. I couldn’t even decide on a paint color. The empty walls made the place feel cold.
“I have two houses I’m renovating. An old Victorian and a midcentury ranch. I figure I’ll keep one of them for myself. I’ll move in when I have someone to share it with.”
Winnie refused to even glance in my direction and I doubted she heard me. When she finally focused on my face, I was startled by the terror in her eyes.
“I care about you a lot.”
As a guy, I knew what those words meant and figured she was dumping me. “I care about you too.”
“I want to be close to you.”
“Okay,” I said, nervous at the hollow tone of her voice.
Winnie handed me the can of soda. “I’ll be back in a minute.”
Winnie disappeared into the bathroom for a long time. I knew girls had their issues, so I didn’t knock on the door and put her on the spot. Instead, I remained on the couch and worried silently.
When the door opened, I remained casual as if she hadn’t been gone for over thirty minutes. My attempt to play cool ended when I saw her dressed in a long burgundy robe.
“I have an idea,” she said, sounding terrified.
I opened my mouth to respond, but decided silence was better. Approaching me, Winnie trembled.
“I need to practice being close. Can we just practice?” she asked, nearly in tears.
“Are you sure you’re ready?”
“I don’t know. I want to try. Can we try?”
Winnie’s voice hit a high panicked pitch and I did the only thing that made sense.
Opening my arms, I said softly, “We’ll try.”
Nearly five minutes passed from when I reached for Winnie and she actually stood in front of me. She inched closer, paused, backed up a little, and looked around, before finally inching closer again. Once standing in front of the couch where I waited, Winnie opened her robe.
I prayed she wasn’t naked. No way was Winnie ready to expose her body. Besides, I didn’t think I could restrain my baser desires if she was undressed in my arms. Instead of nude, Winnie wore a yellow bikini, leaving most of her pale skin bare.
“I don’t work out,” she said, staring at me in horror.
“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about,” I mumbled, taking her hands and tugging her gently into my lap. “You’re perfection.”
Winnie straddled me then placed her hands on my shoulders. The robe remained on, yet open in the front.
I wanted to explore. How could a man with a beautiful girl on his lap not want to touch every inch of exposed flesh? Rather than freak her out, I stared into her hazel eyes and traced her pretty pink lips with my finger.
“Should I take off my shirt?” I asked, kissing her jaw. “I have to warn you that I don’t work out either.”
Despite her fear, Winnie laughed. “I’ve seen you without your shirt. Please, take it off. It’s only fair.”
I pulled off my shirt and tossed it aside. Her gaze immediately focused on the ugly wound on the right side of my chest. Her fingers reached out and caressed the scar so gently I barely felt her. When she lifted her gaze to meet mine, I saw the concern in her eyes.
“I’m going to kiss you now,” I said, hoping to distract her from the painful memories of that day.
“Okay,” she whispered, leaning forward as my hands slid into the robe and caressed her bare back.
Winnie’s body remained stiff in my arms. She didn’t react to my kisses or my nails grazing her skin. When I gazed into her eyes, I felt as if I was staring into pools of nothingness. I might have stopped except I’d seen Winnie disappear on me before and she always returned.
Taking her hands from my shoulders, I placed them on my chest. Winnie didn’t react, her skin covered in goose bumps and nipples soft under my touch. She might as well been doing the dishes with the level of arousal her body felt.
Her fingertips caressed my collarbone then returned to my chest. Like the sun breaking through the darkness, Winnie kissed me with more heat.
She moaned in my mouth before pressing her hips closer to mine. My erection struggled against jeans suddenly a size too small. Moaning now, I wrapped my arms around her and snuggled her even closer until her chest slid up and down mine.
“Dylan,” she said and it sounded almost like a question.
“You’re safe,” I whispered, sucking at her shoulder. “I’ll never hurt you.”