Damaged and the Beast (Damaged #1)

Cooper stared at the bread. “Last night, I thought I had lost you. I can’t shake that feeling.”


“I’m right here,” I said, cuddled against him as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “I had a bad dream and it wasn’t about you.”

“The way you looked at me though. I sat there with you staring at me in fear and I thought how could you ever love me again when you’re so afraid of me?” When I said nothing, Cooper sighed. “I lived my whole life without you and I was fine. I was happy even. Then, I meet you and it’s like an addiction. Like I can’t imagine you not being there every day with me. Just the thought of you leaving is fucking awful and I feel like nothing is worth shit. I need you in a way that you can’t understand.”

“I do understand,” I said, running my hand over his hard chest. “It’s just that I’m used to doing without so I’m better at hiding it. When I think of losing you, I feel like my life will be shit too.”

“You need me.”

“More than you can understand. I’ve only had one person who ever loved me in such a great way and she wasn’t able to give me everything. You have the power to make things beautiful for me and you love me enough to do that. I feel safer with you than ever in my life.”

Cooper smiled. “You deserve everything and I’d give it to you, if you let me.”

“Why would I stop you?”

“After losing you last weekend, I feel insecure. I’m not used to the feeling and it’s fucking annoying.”

“It’ll pass. We’ve only known each other a few weeks. In a month, we’ll have gotten over some of the early hiccups.”

“Hiccups? Last night…”

“Stop talking about it,” I said, sitting up and away from him. “I know it upset you, but I want to have a good day. I want to be here with you, not back in the panic of last night. I really don’t want to be back five years ago.”

“I’m sorry.”

Caressing his lips, I smiled. “You look so hot when you pout.”

“It’s why I do it, Farah. The whole thing is a con to reel you in,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows.

“It so fucking worked.”

“I know, right?”

Laughing, we cuddled up and waited for our food.

“What’s your middle name?” I asked when our lunches arrived.

“I don’t have one. Pop doesn’t believe in them. Thinks they’re the man’s way of tracking people easier.”

Even though I could tell Cooper was serious, I laughed. “Makes sense.”

“What’s yours?” he asked, grinning.

“Delta, after my grandma.”

“The one who helped you get to New Hampton?” Once I nodded, Cooper leaned back and studied me. “When we have a girl, we should give her that middle name in honor of the woman who brought us together.”

Gazes meeting, we shared this weird moment where we imagined a future beyond the next month. I realized Cooper needed reassurance that I saw him in my future.

“I like the name Lily. Does that go with Delta?”

Cooper gave me a cocky grin that said he had me hooked. “Lily Delta Johansson sounds perfect. Even if it didn’t, who the hell would complain? Our girl could be named something stupid like Apple and people would tell her it was awesome.”

“But you’d prefer a boy, right? I mean to carry on the family business.”

“Sure, but who says my sons would be smart enough? Tucker’s a fucking idiot, but Sawyer’s smart. Maybe Lily will be my heir? Maybe she’ll make men cry when she enters the room and not just because she’s hot like her mom.”

“A real shitkicker, huh?”

“Hell yeah.”

Grinning, I took his hand. “I like the name Colton for a boy.”

“That’s a man’s name for sure.”

We smiled and something clicked. We weren’t Farah and Cooper dating. We were something else now. Feeling the change, I was suddenly more connected to this day instead of my ugly past. Cooper’s anxiety also faded.

The rest of lunch was casual with Cooper telling me stories about his summers and all of the times he smacked Tucker upside the head. By the time we drove to the movie theater, I was beginning to wonder if Tucker’s stupidity was genetic or simply from Cooper’s roughhousing over the years?