Where the Memories Lie

 

‘Stop it!’ Nadia said. ‘Bickering amongst ourselves isn’t going to make this go away.’

 

205

 

Sibel Hodge

 

I took a few deep breaths to temper down my annoyance with Ethan and compose myself again. He was upset. He was saying things he didn’t mean. I could understand that. It was how he dealt with stress – getting angry instead of talking about his feelings. We were all stressed. And really, he was right. I was responsible for all the snowballing heartbreak by not keeping my stupid, big mouth shut.

 

But could you have kept Tom’s confession a secret? Could you really have said nothing? I asked myself the same questions I’d asked a million times since. I still didn’t have an answer.

 

Finally, I said, ‘I think we could be vague to Charlotte and Anna about the garage. Obviously, we’ll have to tell them Tom knew something, but we can just say that because of the Alzheimer’s he didn’t know what he was talking about and was confused. We’ll say the police are investigating but nothing’s clear at the moment, and we don’t know how Katie’s body got there.’

 

Which is what we did. Not surprisingly, there were more emo-tional outbursts.

 

‘I’ll never be able to leave the house again! What are all my friends going to say when they see me?’ Charlotte screamed.

 

‘Mum, I don’t want to live there anymore,’ Anna wailed. ‘I can’t stay in the same place as a skeleton. What about ghosts?’

 

Anna threw herself down on the sofa in between Ethan and me.

 

‘Darling, there are no such thing as ghosts.’ Ethan scooched closer and kissed her forehead.

 

‘How do you know?’ she challenged.

 

‘Everyone in the village is going to know that Granddad killed someone. They’ll hate us.’ Charlotte’s lower lip trembled as she tried hard not to cry.

 

‘You’ll be starting sixth form college after the holidays; you’ll meet new people who aren’t from the village or your school so it won’t be as bad as you think. And we don’t know he did kill someone at the moment.’ Nadia reached for Charlotte.

 

206

 

Where the Memories Lie ‘But it’ll be in the papers, won’t it? Everyone will know our name.’ Charlotte put her hand on her hip, tapping her foot anxiously. ‘We’ll have to move house!’

 

‘And even if Granddad was confused, how would he know where her skeleton was if he didn’t have anything to do with it?’

 

Anna sobbed, her cheeks wet.

 

‘That’s what the police are trying to find out, sweetheart.’

 

I wiped away her tears with my hand.

 

‘I’m not going back. You can’t make me go back there. I can’t live in that house!’

 

‘Nadia will let us stay here for a few days.’ I looked to Nadia helplessly. ‘But we’ll have to go back at some point.’

 

‘My life is ruined now!’ Anna jumped up and ran out of the room. The downstairs bathroom door slammed then locked, and she shouted out a muffled, ‘I’m staying in here and never coming out!’

 

Ethan got up and walked out the front door. Charlotte stormed off up the stairs. Nadia gathered some ingredients together to start baking a batch of scones.

 

207

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter Twenty-Three

 

 

I needed to get out of the house and clear my head. The walls were oppressive and claustrophobic, stifling me. I needed to breathe fresh air. Feel the wind on my face. Uncoil my frayed nerves and cramping stomach. Try to outrun the guilt for bringing this upon us all.

 

I left Anna in the bathroom. I couldn’t deal with her at the moment. As soon as I had that thought I immediately felt guilty.