Where the Memories Lie

 

‘Probably soon.’ I explained what had happened when the police questioned Tom earlier and how upset he’d become. ‘I don’t know how long it would’ve taken to get Tom dressed after we left.

 

Mary was going to make him a cup of tea. Maybe Tom and Ethan are still on their way to Durdle Door.’

 

‘Christ. He’s going to die soon, anyway. Why do the police have to harass him?’

 

I sat at the table, feet up on the edge of the chair, arms wrapped around my knees. ‘They have to find out what happened. They have to ask questions.’

 

Nadia pulled her mobile out her bag. ‘I’m going to call Lucas and get him to come over, too.’ She dialled his number and walked out into the hallway with it pressed to her ear. I heard her mumbled voice as Chris sat down so hard on the chair I thought it would collapse beneath him.

 

‘I bet they think I had something to do with it.’ His knee jigged up and down.

 

‘What? Why?’

 

‘Because I was the last one to see her.’

 

‘Is that what they said?’

 

165

 

Sibel Hodge

 

‘No, not in so many words. But they didn’t sound like they believed me.’

 

‘Why shouldn’t they believe you? Tom’s confessed to it.’

 

He shook his head. ‘Have you got any whisky?’

 

I pointed to one of the cupboards. ‘Help yourself.’

 

He grabbed a cut glass tumbler and poured himself a hefty couple of inches. Staring out of the kitchen window at the garage, he swallowed half of it in one go. ‘This is bloody mental. She was really under the garage this whole time?’

 

Nadia came back in and grabbed some mugs, filled them with coffee granules. ‘Apparently, yes.’

 

‘I thought she was leaving. She was supposed to be leaving.’

 

He threw his head back and drained the remains of the glass, then winced and coughed.

 

‘Do you want tea or coffee?’ Nadia asked him.

 

He wiggled the glass in the air. ‘No, I’ll stick to this.’ He poured himself some more whisky. ‘Dad couldn’t even kill a spider.

 

Don’t you remember, when you were a kid and you were scared of them all the time?’ His gaze darted in Nadia’s direction. ‘He never killed them. He always captured them between a glass and a bit of cardboard. Said that everything deserved a chance to live.’ He threw a hand in the air wildly. ‘So how could he kill her?’

 

‘People can snap,’ I said. ‘Lose their temper and do things they regret. It must’ve been an accident. That’s what Tom told me, that it was an accident.’ It’s what I kept trying to tell myself, although exactly what kind of accident, I couldn’t even imagine. And if it was, why hadn’t he told the police at the time? Why cover it up?

 

‘What did the police ask you?’ Nadia poured boiling water into the mugs and stirred them with a spoon.

 

‘Just . . .’ He sniffed. ‘Just what had happened between me and Katie. I told them about me finishing with her about seven months 166

 

Where the Memories Lie before she left, and that I hadn’t really seen her until that day when I was waiting at the bus stop and she was leaving home.’

 

‘Are you sure you never slept with her after you’d split up?’

 

I asked.

 

‘Of course I’m sure! I think I’d know that. Why?’

 

‘It’s just that she said something weird the last time I saw her.

 

At the time I thought she meant you but maybe she really meant Tom. She said, “If he thinks I’m going to fuck him again, he can fuck off”.’

 

Chris looked at me as if I’d punched him. ‘She wasn’t sleeping with Dad. That’s just . . . sick.’

 

Nadia handed me a mug of steaming coffee and sat opposite.

 

My hands shook as I took it. I’d probably had far too much caffeine for one day.