“So when do you start?”
It’d taken us a while, but we’d finally gotten to a place where I could talk about my life here without her voicing her concerns. It didn’t matter that Cash had an answer for every last one of them, she didn’t know him, so therefore, that meant he couldn’t be trusted. That all changed a couple of weeks ago when I’d invited her over while Cash was in town. They’d spent one day together, and suddenly, she no longer had a problem with him. Granted, she put him through the ringer, making me believe an interview for the CIA would’ve been easier than what she’d put him through. Now, she was more concerned about my heart getting broken for a different reason. She claimed he looked at me with hearts in his eyes, and made a big deal about the way he’d touch me—which I’d grown used to and no longer gave much thought. He’d expressed his lack of sexual attraction toward me, and even though it had hurt to hear, I’d accepted that it was best.
“Next week. My first official day is Tuesday.” I practically had a countdown on my calendar. Just the thought of getting out of the house and having a place to go twice a week that didn’t involve a grocery store made me giddy.
We talked for a little bit longer about Aria, Derek, Cash, her new apartment, and a few wasted minutes on my mother, before her lunch break ended and she had to head back. As much as I loved our phone calls, I hated the physical distance between us. She’d tried several times to get me to drive over and spend a few days on the other coast, but I politely declined each time. I had no interest in returning—other than to see Stevie—but at least she made the effort to come to me. She claimed to understand my need to stay away, but I suspected she’d likely stop making the trip once the newness of my move wore off.
And that’s what bothered me the most.
Long after our call had ended, I remained on the porch, lost in thought as the waves moved in and out. A few older women walked along the shore, a dog darting back and forth a few times, and several boats going so fast they looked like they floated across the surface of the ocean in the distance. But mostly, I watched a woman, maybe a little older than me, building a sandcastle with a young boy. It made me realize that even though everything appeared to be falling into place—Aria, getting a job, finding an easy and effortless routine with Cash—I was still missing one thing.
And it happened to be the one thing that pushed Cash to find a roommate.
Aside from the weekends, my life lacked companionship. I’d hoped that hole would be filled with a job—coworkers and the people who’d come in and out during my shifts—but that still left the days in between and the hours before and after void of the kind of human interaction I craved. I yearned for a more steady, reliable support system than a few strangers bringing their children into the library to read a book. And while I regarded the woman and the boy on the beach in front of the house, I found myself daydreaming of having friends on the island. Of getting together with a few other moms and relaxing in the sand while our kids played together on the beach. By the time I shook out of the fantasy, the woman was gone.
“One thing at a time,” I told myself as I headed back inside. “Job first, then friends.”
I could’ve gone down the line, starting with Monday and ending with Friday, and given a laundry list of reasons to prove how each day was the worst of the week. Monday because Cash went back to work. Aside from it being lonely, it was also the time Aria threw the biggest fit. She missed Cash and didn’t understand why he was gone, which broke my heart, but it also left my every last nerve sizzling and burnt to a crisp—no, Monday’s tantrum surpassed fried nerves. I had looked forward to Tuesday, yet by two in the afternoon, it’d earned the title of being the worst day of the week. As much as I enjoyed the freedom of bringing Aria to the library with me, she’d apparently lost interest after two hours, and missing her regularly scheduled nap only made things worse, causing me to be sent home an hour early.
Wednesday wasn’t too bad where Aria was concerned, but I became convinced that hump day would never end. This week, I was exhausted after running around the library for five hours yesterday—even though it felt like ten—which only intensified the normal feelings of loneliness I experienced since moving to Geneva Key. Thursday had been much of the same as Tuesday, yet I didn’t get to leave early. I worked the entire six-hour shift, of which the last two hours Aria curled up with a giant stuffed bear in the sorting room where she cried herself to sleep. Needless to say, dreamland didn’t elude me that night.
And then Friday came. Even before I started my job, I’d wake up convinced it was the worst day of the week. Just the thought of Cash being home when I woke up the next morning made every second stretch on. Even though we spoke on the phone almost every night, it wasn’t the same as having him here. His presence offered me a sense of safety—not that I’d ever felt unsafe without him, yet the comfort of his close proximity set my mind at ease. But more than that, he gave me the company I’d lacked when he was gone.
And today was no different. Once I made it to dinnertime, the rest of the evening was a breeze. It was the one night I didn’t have to fight Aria to go to sleep. All I had to do was tell her Cash wouldn’t come home if she didn’t stay in bed and close her eyes, and she’d be passed out within minutes. Come December, she’d wonder why both Cash and Santa wouldn’t show up if she were awake, but I figured I’d cross that bridge when we got there. We still had a few more months before I had to have an explanation.
Normally, waiting up for Cash wasn’t an issue. I would be so excited to have another adult in the house that I literally couldn’t fall asleep. But after the change in my schedule due to starting my job, I wasn’t sure I’d make it. So, rather than lie in bed and listen for the door, I sat on the couch and watched TV. By midnight, I’d gone from sitting to curled up on the armrest. It must not have been much later that I’d fallen asleep, only to be woken when Cash draped a blanket over me.
I rubbed my eyes to focus on him, instantly feeling better as soon as I realized he was home. “Hey,” I whispered and tried to sit up.
Seeing his smile before I was fully awake made me melt. When I wasn’t half asleep, it was easy to remind myself that he didn’t have romantic feelings for me. But while my brain was still under a dense fog of slumber, I didn’t have the wherewithal to keep myself from falling for him, allowing myself to believe those smiles were reserved for me.
“Hey,” he repeated in the sexiest voice I’d ever heard. “You’re tired; maybe you should go to bed.”