While relieved for the explanation, it bothered me that she hadn’t told me. “Really…”
“Yeah. He showed up here unannounced last night.”
My heart sank, because I knew under normal circumstances, she would have come to me about this. Seeing him couldn’t have been easy for her. Even though I knew the answer, I asked her anyway. “Why didn’t you say anything to me about this?”
“You were with Chloe. I didn’t want to bother you. Anyway, it was fine. We just talked. It wasn’t as bad as I imagined it might be to see him after the way I left his house that day.”
“What did he say to you?”
“You know what? I don’t want to waste this night rehashing all of that. My father and I…we’re actually fine. It was an okay visit.”
“You sure you don’t want to talk about it?”
“I’m positive.”
“Okay.” I pulled her into me and planted my forehead on hers. “You know what I was thinking? Maybe we should go to Italy for our vacation. I want to kiss the ground of the land that brought me you. I’ve never been there. We could visit the Amalfi Coast. What do you think?”
“I’m sure Italy is beautiful.”
“You didn’t answer my question.” I pulled back to examine her face. “You don’t seem as excited as I thought you’d be. We don’t have to go there. We can go somewhere else.”
She placed both of her hands around my face and said, “You’re amazing. I’d be lucky to go anywhere with you.” Yet she wasn’t smiling when she said it.
What the fuck?
“Are you alright? You seem down. Are you sure your father didn’t upset you?”
“I’m okay.”
“I don’t believe you.”
She stayed silent, and it was starting to seriously alarm me.
I brushed the back of my hand along her cheek. “You know you can tell me anything, right? I know that the stuff with Genevieve and Chloe hasn’t been easy for you. I need you to talk to me when things are bothering you, not keep them inside. There’s nothing we can’t work through as long as you don’t keep things from me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about. My mood is just off tonight. Can we just go lie down?”
I examined her face before responding, “Sure.”
Despite her explanation, an ominous cloud seemed to follow us as we headed into her bedroom. I whipped my tie off. As I unbuttoned my shirt, Soraya was just sitting on the bed, watching me. I loved the fact that she was so enthralled with my undressing, but to be honest, it was a little odd and uncharacteristic for her to just be staring at me like that. She was definitely not acting herself tonight.
Throwing my shirt on the chair, I said, “You don’t want to talk, then I’m gonna have to find another way to make you feel better.”
She stood up and walked over to me then slowly traced her index finger around the tattoo of her name over my heart. “The fact that you did this means so much to me. I don’t think I ever really expressed that enough.”
“You mean so much to me. You brought me back to life, Soraya. This was the least I could do to express how I feel. It represents how you’re always with me, even when we can’t physically be together because of work or Chloe. Ultimately, knowing you’re there for me and that you have my back is what’s getting me through.”
She continued to stare at my ink when she asked, “Will you make love to me?”
“Was there ever a question about whether that would be happening right now?”
“No, but I want take it slow tonight. Savor it.”
“I can do slow.”
Sex couldn’t solve everything, but I was sure as hell going to try to fuck her out of this funk she was in. I was going to show her with my body exactly how much I loved her, that there was nothing we couldn’t get through as long as we stuck together both literally and figuratively.
She reached up and started to kiss me passionately in a way that almost felt desperate. As we collapsed onto the bed, her grip around my neck was tight as she pulled me to her, spreading her legs open wide.
“Please,” she begged.
Seeing her bare and spread eagle like that, I immediately had to remind myself of her request to take it slow, because in that moment, I just wanted to ravage her *.
As I entered her, she let out the most beautiful gasp into my ear. Moving in and out with a slow and hard intensity, I realized that there was definitely a difference between pure, unbridled fucking and making mad, passionate love. You had to be truly in love with someone to achieve the latter. And I was definitely in love with Soraya in a way that I had never been with anyone before. It was time to let her know.
As I sunk into her, trying not to crush her with the weight of my eager body, I whispered into her ear, “I love you so much, Soraya.” Withdrawing and thrusting all the way into her again, I repeated, “I love you.”
She responded simply by grasping onto me tighter, bucking her hips and guiding my body. I wanted so badly for her to return those three words back to me. Instead, she remained silent until I felt wetness on my shoulders.
She was crying.