It felt so fucking good to be playing football again, for real this time. Even when I was getting hit, everything about it felt amazing. Except the pain, I could have done without that.
But if I had to take the pain in order to do this for a living, it was worth it. I just hoped I’d get to do this every Sunday in the fall and winter for many years to come. In New England, where I belonged.
We were down by 11 going into the 4th quarter. If we didn’t prevail here, the last few games wouldn’t even matter - we couldn’t make the playoffs.
It was time to man up, as I had told Hud earlier.
I walked up and down the bench, tapping guys on the pads and getting them worked up, making sure they knew how important these next 15 minutes were.
Everyone got the picture.
I looked over at Charlotte with the rest of the athletic staff. She looked gorgeous, even in her staff uniform. Who was I kidding, she’d look incredible in a burlap sack.
Focus, Parker, focus. This was work time. After this I could spend as much time as I wanted thinking about Charlotte and what to do about her. As much time as till…tomorrow, when it was time to start prepping for our next game.
No rest for the wicked, as they always said.
Hud managed to get the defense off the field after only couple minutes, no score on Arizona’s part, leaving us still down 11. I got back on the field and did what I did best.
I made plays, I set up the running game and found the right time to find Drake Rollins, always open for business as only Drake Rollins could be, and just a few minutes later, we’d scored another touchdown.
After the extra point, we were down 14-10. Closer, but still losing. Close only mattered in horseshoes and hand grenades, so we still had work to do.
I still had work to do.
I couldn’t help but look at Charlotte again as I trotted off the field and let the defense take over. She watched me too, when she thought I wasn’t looking. I gave her a small wave, and she waved back, but I could tell she wasn’t really putting any weight behind it.
Every time I saw her I wanted to take her into my arms and sweep her away from all this. Of course, I had work to do, and 52 teammates and millions of fans to take care of first, but as soon as this game was over I was gonna go over there and tell her what was what.
I’d tell her she had me all wrong, I wasn’t the guy she thought I was, and that I was done hiding away my feelings for her behind some dumb rule that kept me from enjoying my life and creating meaningful relationships beyond my teammates.
And then we’d figure out just what we were.
I sat down again on the bench with my drink, getting rehydrated and watching the defense try and work over Arizona’s offense and give me time to get back on the field and make the winning score.
Arizona was having a good run of it this time, and we were giving up just a little too much yardage for my taste. I leaned forward, resting my head on my hands, unable to tear my gaze away from the field.
Arizona was just past half field when they went back on a pass play that got broken up by one of our pass rushers almost as soon as it began. Their QB feinted left and right, looking for a opening, before losing his mind and heaving up a terribly thrown, almost lazy pass forward to no one in particular.
No one in particular but Hudson Fucking Asher, who caught the ball, cradling it in those gigantic hands of his as the crowd also lost their fucking mind as Hud raced down the field, only finally tackled by their quarterback, who seemed to remember at the last second that he was the only guy protecting a touch down.
There was only a minute left in the game, and our offense was about to go on the field. We had a chance. Roughly half the field to go.
I could do this.
I HAD to do this.
There was no other option.
My entire career had come down to this series.
I shot a look at Charlotte before I put my helmet on and she managed a smile at me, and I waved back before I jogged onto the field.
Now it was time to play. Hud had given us a huge advantage and great field position, now I had a minute to capitalize on it and bring home a win.
The first couple plays went easy, a running play and a short pass, after which we got a quick first down.
Time was running out, though, and we couldn’t afford to stop moving. The call for the play came in through my headset and I relayed it to the team.
It was the wrong call, and as soon as the play started, the pocket crumbled as the Arizona pass rush caved in the right side, just as the Steelers had done so many weeks ago.
I jumped out of the way, but couldn’t avoid taking another huge sack.
Down I went to the ground, and I heard Coach Armstrong screaming for a time out, which we got.
I lay there for a few seconds, until a play crystallized in my head, and I jumped back up, testing out the knee - it worked just fine, small miracle there after that huge hit.