“I’m going to be that one person in his life he can’t shake. I’m going to do whatever I can to see the good in him and make him realize that I won’t abandon him like everyone else. It’ll be hard as hell, but I’ll have to let the hurtful things he says and does go. I’ll have to remember it’s a defense mechanism and that’s it.”
I casted a glare across the cafeteria and straight at Royal, studying him like he was my newest project, like I could fix him. He was still sitting with the assholes of my class. I could see him looking at me and watching me as I watched him. There was something very personal about it; sitting in a packed cafeteria with hundreds of kids but both just watching each other as if no one else was here with us. As if there weren’t table upon table separating us. Royal was dangerous… to my heart, my soul, and possibly my life.
Everything was great until Sasha realized Royal’s attention was no longer on her. You could see her trying to figure out where his eyes were looking. She must have figured it out because in a matter of seconds she was sending icy daggers at me from across the lunchroom. I stared at both of them as if they were a car accident waiting to happen. Sasha knew exactly what she was trying to execute. Leaning over and into the crook of his neck she whispered something, her eyes gleaming with hate toward me. Then she lifted herself up so she was even with Royal’s face and pressed her lips against his, wrapping her hand around his head and pulling him in even closer.
My stomach twisted in a knot. I felt like I was violating some type of code of conduct. Like Sasha owned him and I was looking in from the outside.
“Talk about PDA. Jesus, they need to get a room.” Jordan sounded like she was going to puke, and the sound alone cheered me up, a bubble of happiness building deep inside of me. At the very least, I wasn’t the only one who found their newly found love absolutely disgusting. I couldn’t force myself to eat any of the fries or hot dog that I had gotten for lunch, so I got up from the table telling Jordan my goodbyes and tossing my food into the nearest trashcan. I forced myself not to look over my shoulder at Royal just one last time, but instead headed straight toward the girls’ locker room, to get ready for my least favorite activity of the day: gym class.
I was a mess of emotions and nearly halfway down the hall when heavy footfalls sounded behind me. I anticipated his touch before his hand even landed against my shoulder, stopping me from going any further. Still I wasn’t happy that he was touching me after having just been rubbed up against that snotty, filthy bitch.
“Excuse you, asshole.” Anger entwined my words.
“You’re excused, Noelle.” Royal’s deep voice met my ears far too close to me. The smell of spicy men’s body wash and cigarette smoke invading my senses.
“Have you been smoking?” I accused, his scent fucking with my mind and body. I shouldn’t be feeling the things that I was, especially not for someone like him.
Three days at this school and he had already had sex with that whore, and was now apparently skipping classes for a smoke break. Bad boy wasn’t even a word I would use to describe Royal.
He craned further, his head tilting sideways as if he was trying to read me. My eyes dropped down to his lips where his tongue had darted out, wetting his bottom lip. He was in my space forcing me to take in a breath that was filled with nothing more than his scent. It was permeating, choking me. Everything on my body tingled as his breath fell against my cheek. If I turned even the slightest bit our lips would touch. My heart thudded against my rib cage, threatening to break free.
“Tell me, love, when did you become my mother again?” He spoke to me like my opinion of him didn’t matter, and honestly it didn’t. I wanted to punch him in the face, knee him in the balls— inflicting some type of pain upon him. I wanted to bring any other emotion but the present to the surface. I wanted to drown him in some him in his own feelings.
“I wasn’t trying to act like your mother, Royal. It just caught me off guard, that and I wasn’t aware that you had added smoking to your already long laundry list of shit you shouldn’t be doing.” I hated that he lumped me in with his mom. As if I was going to ground him or something. The choices he made were his, and he would have to deal with the consequences of them.
“I’m a criminal, baby, a bad man; far too naughty for a little miss perfect princess like yourself,” he spoke, using the nickname that he gave me. His eyes drifted up and down my body as if he was checking me out. His eyes on my exposed skin caused me to squirm.
I knew the effect he had on me was dangerous, but the danger of it was the thing that tempted me most. “You should remember that…” His voice was deep as he swiped his thumb across my bottom lip. His fingertips against my skin awakened a piece of me that I didn’t want to acknowledge.