Even with Penna’s words in my head, I still didn’t see a way that I could open myself up to Landon enough to even hear what he had to say. I was the opposite of Penna in that regard—I might have pushed the envelope on every stunt, but when it came to my emotions, I chose self-preservation over understanding.
Unfortunately, I also knew that Landon was a persistent guy.
And when it came to self-preservation, he was the most reckless of them all.
Chapter Seven
Landon
At Sea
The woman was impossible.
I couldn’t remember a time when I’d had less pride than the last two days, trying to track her down. We had two classes together, so I thought it would be easy, but she left as soon as we were dismissed and dodged my every attempt to see her. She’d gone so far as to leave the table in the cafeteria when I sat down to eat, which was almost laughable, because I knew how much that girl loved her food.
It was like she didn’t even care that I was on board, yet my every waking moment was consumed with caring that she was. That would have been enough to send me into a tailspin of rejection, but the way she made sure we were never in the same room—except for classes—told me that she cared enough to always know where I was.
Maybe it was grasping at straws, but it was all that I had.
I checked my watch and cursed. Running late for a production meeting was about to get me on Pax’s shit list. My mind had wandered to Rachel while I was on the treadmill, and before I knew it another three miles had gone by as I plotted. Not that I was arguing with extra cardio. I had to be in the best shape of my life for Nepal, but now I was definitely not on time.
“Sorry I’m late!” I yelled down the hall as I shut the door to the suite.
“Get your ass in here!” Pax yelled.
“I’m all sweaty, let me shower,” I said, coming into the dining room where the staff had gathered around the table.
“I don’t care if you’re covered in baby oil. Put your ass in the chair,” Pax said, pointing to my empty seat.
“Okay, okay, I’m here,” I said, taking my chair and trying to focus. Bobby sat at the head of the table, while Pax took the center—he liked to be able to reach every map and picture that lay spread out in front of him. Penna and I took up the other side, while a few of the other Renegades and camera-crew members stood or sat around us.
“I’m really not sure why I’m here,” Penna mumbled, folding her hands in her lap.
“Because you’re banged up, not fucking dead, Penna,” Pax snapped. “You’re still a Renegade.”
“You sure I should be?”
“Later,” he hissed at her.
“Don’t fight in front of the kids,” I said, leaning forward to see the pictures of Sri Lanka, our next destination. “Where were we?”
Pax ripped his hands over his hair. “Okay. We have three days in Sri Lanka. Day one is taken up by field excursions for class. Who has them?”
A collection of hands went up. The hardest part about filming the documentary while we were on the Study at Sea program was definitely working everything around our class load.
Terms were simple: if we failed, we were off the boat and out of the documentary.
I raised my hand, knowing that I had an excursion to Gal Viharaya, but at least I’d be with Rachel. Whether I could get her to talk to me would be another matter.
“Okay, I think we all have one,” Pax muttered, flipping through the folder. “We have permits for the hang gliding stunt off Sigiriya, but I can tell you that it was a very reluctant permit and it’s a pretty sacred site. We’ll be watched, and since I really don’t want to spend any more time in a jail cell this trip, let’s mind our p’s and q’s.”
A small hum of laughter went through the group. Pax was right. The shit we’d gone through in Madagascar when Brooke hid the permits needed to be a one-time-only thing. Penna paled next to me, and I put my hand over hers on her lap.
“It was not your fault,” I whispered so no one else could hear.
She didn’t look up from where she picked at her nail polish.
“The inherent danger here is how we’ll be launching. This formation leaves no room for error, not with only a matter of feet between your wing and the person next to you. You have got to be careful and aware of the other Renegades around you. It’s not a long flight, but we’re packed in like sardines.”
“Three point six kilometers,” Penna said.
“Rebel?” Bobby prompted.
Penna looked up, but only so far as the pictures on the table. “Sigiriya is about two hundred meters tall. Given the typical rate of descent of eighteen to one, we’re looking at three point six kilometers of flight. You’ll have to pull the synchronized turns pretty damn fast and really damn accurately.”
“You’ll?” I asked.
“I’m not going,” she said.
Paxton’s eyes narrowed. “Another thing we’ll talk about later.”
“Hang gliding is something you can do with us. One of us will just take you tandem,” I said quietly as Pax moved on to the technical turns we’d be making.
She shook her head. “No. Pax should take Leah, and if you’re smart, you’ll take Rachel as a bribe. You know she loves this stuff, and it might get you a little face time where she acknowledges that you exist.”
“Penna, come on. This has always been the four of us.”
“Yeah? Well, Nick is paralyzed and I’m in a non-weight-bearing cast, so looks like it’s the two of you.” She abruptly pulled back from table and wheeled herself out through the sliding glass door to the balcony that crossed the back of the ship.
“I’ll take her place,” Zoe said, pulling her chair into the vacant spot Penna had left.
“Not necessary,” I said, hoping she hadn’t listened in.
She shrugged and slid closer while Pax rambled on about the importance of GoPro footage. “You seem really crabby, Landon. Want me to come visit tonight?”
I looked over to her, taking in her brown hair and welcoming smile. There was a reason I’d been “visiting” with her more than I should have the last few months. It was easy to pretend that she was Rachel. But now with Rachel a handful of rooms away, I knew that an imitation wasn’t going to do it for me anymore. “Thanks for the offer, Zoe, but I really think I’m good.”
“Oh,” she said, her eyebrows shooting up in surprise.
We hadn’t been an item—she knew better—but damn, it felt like I’d just said, “Thanks for everything, but we’re done.”
Maybe because I had.
I felt her side eyeing me a few times as we went over the plan again, the gear, who needed what where.
“One more thing…we’d like to do kind of a fun side trip on our last day,” Pax said. “There are some natural waterslides in the Nuwara Eliya region, so we’ve got a totally optional excursion up there to play around, if you guys are interested. It’s mostly my way of saying thank you for kicking ass at the Abu Dhabi exhibition.”
Everyone cheered, and I pushed back from the table. “Hey, Pax,” I said just loud enough to get his attention. “Can you make sure I’ve got a tandem rig on my hang glider?”
Zoe tensed beside me. Guess it had been loud enough to get hers, too.
“Yeah,” Pax said with a grin. “You going to try a little bribery?”