Shaking that thought out of his head, he stepped up to the desk. It was empty, but a small placard proclaimed that the person on duty would be back in fifteen minutes. Kai sighed. They were probably using the restroom or grabbing a bite to eat and would be back soon, but he really didn’t want to wait. He needed to be doing something constructive. Not wanting to stand there, looking forlorn and dejected, he decided to wait in the common room.
Looking around the room full of empty chairs and tables, all surrounding a low-burning circular fireplace, filled Kai with a melancholy loneliness. Turning away from yet another fireplace, he looked around for the most comfortable chair in the place, so he could rest his aching body. He found it immediately and smiled when he did. The plush, padded chair looked like you’d sink into it so far, you’d have to be helped back out. Comfortably nestled into the chair was the woman Kai had been hoping to find. She was sound asleep, and her long, curly locks flowed over the arm of the chair as she used it as her makeshift pillow. Sighing and shaking his head, Kai fondly gazed down at his exhausted cousin. Her face was pale, her lips slightly parted as she released shallow breaths. Her cheeks were red and splotchy, like she’d fallen asleep crying. Kai hated that she had.
Kneeling before her, he brushed a strand of hair across her cheek behind her ear. She twitched at his touch, but didn’t wake up. “I’m so sorry, Jessie, for everything,” he whispered. Leaning over, he softly kissed her cheek. “I love you so much,” he said in her ear, knowing she wouldn’t hear it.
Jessie stirred and made a noise but didn’t say anything and didn’t open her eyes. Kai’s eyes drifted down her body, then he scooped her into his arms. He couldn’t leave her out here alone all night. It wasn’t safe, and Jessie meant everything to him. He couldn’t abandon her. Family didn’t abandon family.
Careful to not wake her, he lifted her up. She grumbled something under her breath and ran her arms around his neck, but she still seemed asleep. Pausing, Kai took a second to enjoy the feeling of her body in his arms, but that feeling was the source of all their problems. With a heavy sigh, Kai walked her back to their room.
He fumbled with the room key in his pocket, but eventually he got the door open and staggered inside. Kai was getting tired now, too, since she was safe and secure, and he no longer had to worry about her. Gently closing the door with this toe, he walked her to the bed. He laid her down, then removed her shoes and adjusted the covers around her. Jessie sighed in contentment, stretching before turning away from him and curling into a ball. Kai listened to her low, even breaths, happy that, for once, he could take care of her.
His hand trailed down her back for a second before he yanked it away. He couldn’t shut off his feelings for her. He couldn’t stop how much he loved her. And now that he’d had her, freely and soberly, he knew he would always want her. Swallowing a painful lump, he took a step away from her. There was no future for them. At all.
Mind made up, Kai grabbed the pen and the pad of paper sitting on the desk and wrote Jessie a note. He didn’t want her to worry when she woke up and found he was gone; he knew how awful it was to not know if the person you loved was all right. After finishing his note, Kai quietly gathered up all of his things. Once he was finished packing, he glanced back at Jessie’s sleeping body.
Knowing what he had to do, and knowing it would break both of them, made a tear roll down his cheek. “I’ll always love you, Jessie. Always.”
More tears followed the first, and he quickly opened the door and walked through it before his resolve completely left him. Walking to the front desk, he was relieved to see that the night person was back. She blinked sleepily, then opened her eyes wide when she saw a guest who was obviously checking out.
“Hello, sir…is there a problem?” Tilting her head, she seemed a little nervous about the prospect of having a disgruntled customer on her shift.
Swallowing back the bile of regret in his throat, Kai shook his head. “Um, no…I just…” He handed her the room key and his credit card. “An emergency popped up back home and I need to leave.” The woman smiled politely, but it was obvious she was relieved that she wasn’t going to be yelled at. Nodding, she took his information and started pressing buttons on the computer. While she worked, Kai pointed back down the hallway. “My cousin is still using the room tonight, so…don’t kick her out or anything.”
The woman gave him a comforting smile. “No problem, sir, you’ve paid through checkout tomorrow, so she can use the room until eleven.”
Kai nodded, wondering what Jessie would think when she woke up back in their room with Kai and all his stuff gone. Hopefully the note he’d left properly explained things. He wished he could explain in person, but it was better this way. For both of them. Sighing, Kai pointed at the phone on the front desk. “Do you think you could call me a cab? I need to get back to Denver.”
The woman paused while reaching for the phone. “Are you sure? Denver is a couple of hours away. That’s going to be an expensive cab ride.”
Kai glanced back at the hallway where his cousin—the love of his life—lie sleeping. Feeling like joy would never touch him again, he twisted back to the curious girl at the counter. “Yeah…I’m sure.”