Instead of You

Oh, God. His voice made all the hairs on my arm stand up. It was deep and raspy, like he’d been very close to sleeping when I called. Shit. He knew it was me. Damn cell phones.

“McKenzie, is that you? Are you all right?” He started to sound a little panicked and I hadn’t meant that, so I answered.

“Yes, sorry. It’s me. I shouldn’t have called.”

“No, wait, don’t hang up. What are you doing?”

I looked around, thinking about making something up, but instead, the truth spilled out. “I’m standing on the patio at a bar. There’s a couple dry humping in the corner.”

“Are you alone?”

His tone was suddenly protective and the effect it had on me was terrifying. And also really wonderful.

“Holly and Becca are here. They’re inside.”

There was a silence between us and I wasn’t sure what to say. I wasn’t even sure why I called him. But I knew I didn’t want to hang up.

“Do you guys need a ride home? Is there a designated driver?”

“We’ll walk. I live just a few blocks away.”

“It’s just the three of you?”

“Yeah.”

“Shit, Kenz. The three of you can’t walk home alone.”

“We do it all the time,” I said, slightly defensive.

“Well, that makes me feel much better,” he said, the sarcasm coming through loud and clear. He let out a breath and then said, “Just let me come walk you guys home. I won’t be able to sleep now, knowing you’ll be walking home alone. In the dark. Three beautiful college girls. In the middle of the night.”

At that point I couldn’t help but let out a tiny laugh. He sounded sort of like a grumpy father.

“I don’t think they’re ready to leave just yet,” I said through my laughter.

“Are you ready?”

My breath stalled at his question. Was I ready to see him again? Was I ready to pass up an opportunity to see his face? To walk next to him? To possibly take in his scent or feel the back of his hand brush up against mine?

No, I wasn’t.

“I’m not ready to go home, but I’ll take you up on a walk, if you’re offering.”

I heard muffled noises from his end of the line and imagined him sitting up from his bed, searching for his shoes. “Which bar are you at?”

“McFadden’s. Right across the street from the bookstore.”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes. Wait on the patio for me.”

“Okay,” I answered softly, thinking to myself that I’d wait anywhere for any length of time for him. Still. And that made me both happy and sad.

“I’ll be right there.”

“All right.”

It was silent for a moment, and I got the feeling he wanted to say more, but I just heard him let out a groan and then the line disconnected. I found a chair and sat down, waiting for Hayes and drinking my water.

Sure enough, ten minutes later, Hayes walked out onto the patio. I stood up when I saw him, a little shocked that he’d actually showed up, that he was actually standing in front of me. I didn’t miss the way his eyes started at my face and moved all the way down to my feet, leaving a trail of warmth in the wake of his gaze. I swallowed hard and stepped toward him, stupidly wobbling on my heels. He was at my side in an instant.

“Need some help?” His question was sincere, his hand on my shoulder, keeping me steady.

“No, I’m okay. It’s just these damned shoes.” I look up at him, my hands at my sides but my fingers tingling with the need to reach out and just touch part of him. Even his shirt. Anything that would send a message from my fingers to my brain that Hayes Wallace was, in fact, standing right in front of me, looking just as handsome as ever, and that he was not a figment of my imagination.

“Come on,” he said, nodding his head toward the door.

I followed him back into the club and he walked straight toward Holly and Becca on the dance floor. He tapped Holly on the shoulder and she turned around smiling, then did a double take, and finally shock registered on her face. Becca was staring at him with wide eyes as well.

“I’m going to take Kenzie on a walk. I don’t want you two walking home. Call a cab.” He shouted this at her over the loud music and then pressed a folded twenty into her hand. Holly looked down at the money, then back up at Hayes, and then to me, still confused. That was when Becca stepped forward, both her hands grasping the sides of my shoulders.

“Are you okay with this? You want to go with him?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” I said, warming from the inside at my friend’s concern for me, but also shaking from adrenaline at the thought of being alone with him. Her hands stayed on me as her eyes drifted to Hayes. She studied him for a moment, his expression never wavering, looking confident and possessive at the same time. Then her eyes came back to me. “You need to text me in an hour if you’re not home. If you don’t text me, I’ll call you nonstop until I hear from you.” I nodded and she turned back to Hayes. “If you fucking hurt her, I’ll kill you.”

“I get it,” he responded, not unkindly. His reply was understanding and soft.

She nodded and then repeated, “Text me.”