Elder groaned, his brow falling over his eyes now tortured and full of pain. “Pim…stop.”
“No, you asked. I stole it for you. I know it doesn’t have a large cash value. In fact, it’s dog-eared and well-used. But it carries so much I need to say to you. To prove just how grateful I am. We might all speak different verses and use foreign alphabets, but you understand me. I don’t want to be silent anymore. I want to talk. To you. I want to understand—”
“Enough.” He shuddered, clutching the dictionary tight. His throat worked as if fighting to respond then his features slipped into unreadable as he asked, “Do you know Japanese?”
His subject change slowed me, but I willingly followed his direction. If he wasn’t ready to discuss what happened between us last night and the fight we’d had this morning, then fine. I could be patient because unlike Elder, who had a finish line in mind for us, I had no intention of letting it end. “No. I studied one year at school, but I’ve forgotten most of it.” I took a step forward, looking harder into his eyes. “Do you?”
He swiped a hand over his face. “You already know the answer to that question.”
We shared a stare, and I saw the reply I already knew. He was born to mixed-race parents. He lived in the valley of East and West and been raised with blended laws and requirements.
He was honourable as well as ruthless.
He was kind as well as cruel.
He was everything I wanted to be and everything I feared.
Then again, if he could speak Japanese, he’d learned it from his mother’s side, yet she hadn’t yelled at him in Japanese, only English. Why was that? Perhaps having a European father meant his mother talked in English out of respect for his memory? Maybe she just preferred it?
Who knew?
Only Elder had the answers, and once again, I was willing to be patient to earn them.
“Teach me?” I asked softly.
“Japanese?”
“Everything.” My voice owned that word—begged him to make it true. Inside those four syllables and ten letters lived acceptance; I was ready for him to teach me to play the cello, learn his history, and let him educate me on everything I missed out on.
Starting tonight with sex and passion and lust and love and all things I desperately needed.
The sun extinguished behind him, leaving us in twilight.
Endless moments ticked past before he pressed the book to his heart and nodded. “I’ll teach you whatever you want to know.” He paused, signalling an end to his sentence. But then his face softened, the mood darkened, and his lips moved with sensual promise. “I’ll show you anything you want to see, Pimlico.” His hand came up, cupping my face for a blistering second. “For you, I’ll do anything.”
The moment was far too big for a small sunset on a crowded beach; far too moving to be wasted in public.
I ached at the sacrifice in his tone; the knowledge he would hurt himself to give me what I wanted.
His temper from this morning was gone. He’d finally reached the same conclusion I had—that we had no choice. We had to hold on and give in and hope we survived whatever it was our bodies and hearts and souls had decided we must endure.
Standing with sand between my toes and sweat upon my skin, I’d never been more alive, more sure, more ready to step forward into something so incredibly special.
I’d had sex with this man and remained unbroken.
I’d lived with this man and remained unhurt.
I’d fought with this man and remained unbruised.
And now, I hugged this man and found a new home.
My arms went around him, my face nestled into his strong chest, my body kissed his from shoulder to hip.
I hugged this man and in some wonderful twist of fate…he hugged me back.
*
“It’s getting dark.”
I glanced at Elder who’d moved stealthily beside me for the past half an hour. His eyes were never still, hunting the public, expecting evil when I only saw romance. I didn’t know why he was so alert or why he stayed so close to me. I wanted to ask but I also didn’t want to ruin this wonderful stroll like a normal couple.
We’d walked the beach as it slowly became deserted.
We were just like the other men and women in love.
After our hug, we’d separated shyly, looking away and making excuses to walk and focus ahead rather than stand and stare at each other.
Elder sent Lance and Bill away, and our tingling connection hadn’t faded. It sparkled around us like stardust as night slowly draped Monte Carlo. Streetlights turned on, battling away the gloom and reminding people sunbaking was over, and it was now time to party with the moon.
People slowly gathered up deck chairs and sodden towels, hoisted up sandy clothes over soggy bathing suits, and tramped up the beach.
Hotels everywhere would be drenched in salt water and sprinkled with sand from returning tourists.
The more people left, the more aware of Elder I became until we were the only two people left with the soft slap of waves on the shore.
We stopped and faced each other, neither ready for tonight even though it was the only thing I could think about.
I was neither hungry nor energetic. Weary nor eager.
The electricity hissing between us exhausted me to the point where I didn’t know if I was ready to return to the hotel or not. If I was prepared or not. The last time Elder and I were alone, we fought. Would he fight me again over this? Did it make me a horrible person that I knew this would be hard for him, yet I didn’t give him a chance to change his mind?
Elder cleared his throat. “Did you hear me? I said it’s getting dark.” He rubbed his nape. “That was a hint that we should think about going back.”
I walked ahead a little before turning to face him reluctantly. I didn’t know what had changed in the thirty-one minutes since I’d given him the stolen dictionary. Why I’d traded certainty for unsureness and why the very idea of touching him made half of my body warm and melt and the other want to throw itself in the ocean and never stop swimming.
The gentle lap of waves was the only noise as Elder murmured, “We don’t have to do this again, Pim. If you’re not ready.”
I searched his tone for hidden messages. Was he not ready? Would he rather we didn’t have sex again?
You already know the answer to that, silly.
The balmy breeze snatched my hair, whipping it over my shoulder.
Elder came forward, capturing the wayward strands, his warm fingers kissing my neck before settling on my shoulder with a fistful of brown locks. “There is no right or wrong answer here. Forget about what we discussed this morning. If you’ve changed your mind, then we can return to the Phantom and go back to the way things were.” He swayed closer, whispering in my ear. “You’re the one with all the power.”
I shivered, wishing his lips would close the distance and kiss me.