He sighs. “Wow.”
We stay silent for a few seconds.
When he turns to look at me again, his blue eyes are dull, his mouth pulled down in a frown. He clears his throat, and his face turns neutral before he stands from the bench and begins to pace.
“Jesus. Nor. Jesus fucking Christ,” he mutters to himself, his fingers interlocked on the nape of his neck. He stops suddenly and swings around to face me. “Your father, your dad—” he doesn’t need to finish that sentence. We both know what my father will do. But worse, I know what my father is capable of doing. He hates Cole with a passion unrivaled by anything I’ve ever seen before.
“I know,” I whisper. “I know.” I bite my lip, gathering courage to say what I’ve been planning since I heard my father making plans to make Cole’s life harder.
Josh sits next to me, slides his arm across my shoulder and pulls me into him. He wraps the other arm around me and I fall into him, taking in a long trembling breath. He kisses my hair, and even though his kisses don’t come close to the comfort Cole’s offer me, I soak it up. I need the comfort he is offering me. I soak it up before I bring his world crashing down in confusion.
It’s the only way to save Cole.
“He’s coming home soon.” I hear a smile in his voice. “Just a few more weeks. He will be fucking happy. I know he will.” He ducks his head to meet my eyes. “I don’t see you hopping up and down with joy, soon to be momma. What’s wrong, Nor?” He ducks his head to look at me closely. “Shit, Nor? What’s wrong? Don’t you want this? I know that you and Cole are still young. But, it’s already happened. I’m not going to criticize you or my brother.”
“If my dad knows, he won’t let Cole walk out of prison alive. I’m stuck. I’ve thought of ways to do this. I’ve thought about leaving town, but I can’t abandon my sisters and mother in the hands of my father.” The tears I’ve been holding back finally fall free. His arms tighten around me, and he begins to run his hands down my back in soothing circular motions.
He kisses my forehead. “Shh. It’s going to be all right. I swear to you, Nor. I won’t let anything happen to you or Cole. I promise you, Nor. You hear me?”
His words only serve to make my tears fall faster. He continues to hold me until the tears stop falling. Until I feel all that’s leaving my chest are shallow breaths.
I pull back, sit up and wipe my face with the back of my hands.
“Crap! Look what I did to your shirt. I’m sorry I hit you with that information. I didn’t know where else to go or who else to tell. Megs left for Georgia. I’m scared to tell my grandmother because I can’t bear to see the disappointment in her eyes. I wanted someone who knows me and Cole. I want everything to work out. I want my father to stop hating Cole. I can’t understand how someone can hate another person without reason. I want to protect my sisters and mother from my father’s influence and fury. Does that make me selfish?”
“Nor, no. No it doesn’t. You care too much about everyone to be selfish.”
He takes my hand, links his fingers with mine and stares at my wrist. He turns it over twice, his face soft as he studies the cuts on my skin.
We sit in the park until night chases daylight and all that’s surrounding us is the dark night. The wide expanse of a sky that normally soothes me, now makes me feel as though I’m being swallowed by it and there is no way out. But there has to be a way out. There just has to. I need to clear my head and think.
“I need to go home and check on everyone. Thank you for listening to me. I’m not going to let him hurt Cole.”
When I get home, Josh walks me to the door. My body stiffens as my father’s voice comes crashing through the heavy door from somewhere inside the house. He shouts a question and I hear Elon answer in a small voice. Elise yells to him, asking him to leave her alone. Somewhere in there is my mother, most likely curled up in her chair with her hands covering her ears.
My heart is beating hard in my chest when I burst through the door. I round the corner, stop and blink as my eyes readjust to the light. Elon is curled up on the couch and Elise is on her knees in front of our sister in a protective stance. My father is standing next to the fireplace, glaring at my sisters. From somewhere inside the house, I hear my mother’s keening, getting louder with every passing second.
“What’s happening?” I ask, my heart thumping hard in my chest.
My father, having not heard me come in swings his enraged eyes at me, his face flushed in anger. He drops the hand from the wall, straightens and advances toward me. Suddenly I feel a warm body behind mine. A quick look over my shoulder alerts me that Josh followed me inside the house.
I focus on my father as he raises his hand. He unfolds his fist, shoving his palm to my face. My heart stops beating as my gaze drops to the object in his hand.