“Are we done?” I ask, anxious to get upstairs to witness this huge milestone.
“We’re all set,” Dax says, and I don’t wait for him to retract his statement.
I bound up the basement stairs and then up the back staircase that leads to the second floor. I hear belly laughs coming from his room, and I open the door.
“Da-da!” he says as soon as he sees me, and he tries to take a step toward me. He falls onto his outstretched hands and pushes himself back onto his feet. He does this again three more times before he’s able to take several steps, practically leaping into my arms.
“Hey, buddy,” I say as I shower him with kisses.
“Da-da!” he screeches again and Max chuckles.
“I couldn’t believe it, Mr. Armstrong. He was table surfing all day today, and suddenly he let go. Once he realized he could balance, he just took off. It was amazing.”
I take out my phone so I can document this with proper video. My parents are going to be amazed by this as well, and I can’t wait to send it to them.
“Hey, you should get going,” I say to Max, noticing the time. “Thanks for staying late today so we could finish up downstairs.”
“No problem,” he says and walks past us and out the door.
“Bye-bye,” Kai says, and Max backs up to high-five him. Kai giggles and claps his hands.
Although Max was originally hired to be a live-in nanny, I decided that for the time being, I would do this on my own. He usually stays overnight once a week so I can do some late-night editing in the studio.
I haven’t heard from Sam since Pizza Thursday almost three months ago. I haven’t been able to even eat pizza since. Peggy keeps me posted on her, though. She’s been pulling double shifts for months, and that tips me off that she’s trying to hide away. Although Peggy says she’s been enjoying her time with her friends, I don’t believe her. The girl I saw that night was distant. Cold. I’m worried about her.
My heart sinks knowing that Sam isn’t a daily fixture in Kai’s life anymore. Or mine. She was such an important part of his life for so long and the only mother figure he’s ever known. It would kill me to not allow her to see him and continue to be a part of his life.
I yearn for what the three of us finally found together. We formed a family that was destroyed by an ugly truth. A truth we found out about by accident. A truth destroyed by my father.
I need to breathe her air.
Feel her touch.
Consume her fully.
We need her back.
Sam
Present
Long Beach Island, New Jersey
Age 24
THE CHILLY AIR SENDS A SHIVER down my spine, but I dig my bare feet into the cold sand anyway. I’m on Long Beach Island, New Jersey. Cassie gave me the key to her family’s beachfront vacation home. She said I needed a break and time to reflect. She couldn’t have been more right.
I pull the fleece blanket up to my chin and rest my head back on the beach chair. The sun is setting behind me, reflecting beautifully off of the clear water. A large, lone seagull skims along the top of the water in search of its next meal. I love it here. It’s so peaceful and relaxing. Cassie and I would come out here all the time when we were in nursing school. It’s only about an hour and a half from our college, and we made sure to put the house to good use. I smile as I remember some of the epic beach parties we threw. It’s amazing the neighbors haven’t run me off the beach by now because we sure were a nuisance back then.
Waves continue to crash, and the constant sounds of the ocean soothe me. It’s weird being down here by myself; I’ve never been here without Cassie. Last night I slept with all of the windows open, despite the cool ocean winds. I imagined Garrett’s warm arms wrapped around me as I drifted off to sleep.
Why can’t I let him in?