It motivated him in the right direction for the most part, although it just led to us making out more often than not.
We hadn’t had sex yet, and he hadn’t pushed me to do anything I wasn’t ready for or comfortable with. He was being patient with me, and I thought that was super sweet of him. We could spend hours just making out, lying together, letting our hands roam. He’d touch me under my clothes testing my boundaries, but he never took it any further. As far as I knew, it kept him satisfied just being able to feel me and love me in that way for now.
I hadn’t seen or heard from Creed since my prom, over five months ago. That all changed when my phone dinged at midnight on my birthday, scaring the shit out of me. An unknown number lit up my dark room like a beacon in the night, calling for me to answer.
I swiped the screen over, reading his simple message, “Happy birthday, Pippin. Don’t forget to make a wish.”
His words made me smile, but that quickly faded as did the light on my phone. I worked so hard to keep him out of my mind, and every time I thought he was gone, he’d make his way back in. Almost like he sensed I was moving on. Other than that night, it was like he dropped off the face of the earth. I debated on texting him back more often than not, just to know he was alright. Also, resisting the urge several times to ask his ma if she’d heard from him, afraid of the response I’d get.
There were times when I would catch myself thinking about him, hoping he was safe. Praying he was alive. Holding the key he gave me tight in my grasp. Trying to figure out why my mind wouldn’t bring him back, and I had yet to fully grasp that question.
“Whatcha thinkin’ about over there?” Noah probed, walking back into his living room with popcorn in his hands. Ready to play the movie.
His mom went away for the weekend with some of her girlfriends. Saying something about it being long over do. Noah had suspected that she was seeing someone and just didn’t want him to know. Probably too nervous, thinking about how he would react to the news. Fearing for the guy’s life.
To be honest, I would be, too. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was dating again, she was beautiful. Inside and out. I knew Noah still held onto the resentment he had toward her, and I’m sure she knew it as well. Even though there was bitterness on his end, I knew he loved her, and she loved him more than anything. Proving that every day. Their relationship was amazing for mother and son. I think over time his anger for what she put him through would fade. I hoped it would be the same for his brother, too.
Noah never talked about Creed, and I never brought him up, either. His mom didn’t even mention him around me. Which made me think she knew more about where he was than she let on.
“You always bite your lip when you’re deep in thought,” he remarked, once again pulling me away from my thoughts.
“Is there anything you don’t notice?”
“Not when it comes to you.”
I smirked, grabbing some popcorn out of the bowl as he took a seat beside me. “I was thinking about my Jeep if you must know. Thanks for picking me up in your mom’s car tonight. My Jeep should be out of the shop tomorrow morning. Can you take me to pick it up?”
He raised an eyebrow, grinning. “That mean you spendin’ the night?”
I shrugged, smiling. “It depends. Did you rent a man movie? If I have to sit through another violent or bloody film, there better be some hot ass guys.”
“Why? You got one sittin’ right here.”
“Really?” I looked around the room and then back to him. “Where?”
He put the popcorn on the coffee table and grabbed my foot, tugging me to him. Making me squeal and giggle all at the same time.
“You’re lucky you’re so fuckin’ pretty,” he rasped, laying on top of me.
“What about my awesome witty comebacks?”
“What about them?”
My mouth dropped open. “That’s not nice.”
“Someone wasn’t bein’ very nice a few minutes ago,” he retorted, kissing along my neck. His facial hair was inflicting all sorts of feelings in my core.
“Don’t hate because you’re not funny!” I giggled, angling my head down so he couldn’t get into the crevice.
“Now I ain’t funny? I’m fuckin’ funny!”
“Oh yeah, fuckin’ hilarious. You ain’t fuckin’ funny,” I mocked him, using the way he talks.
“Don’t say fuckin’... sounds too dirty comin’ out of somethin’ so sweet.”
“Awe! That was so sweet! But you’re not the boss of me! I can say whatever I want! Fuckin’, fuckin’, fuckin’, fuck!”
He chuckled when he realized I wasn’t going to let up and let him at my neck, so he lifted my dress instead. Blowing raspberries all over my belly, causing me to thrash around like a crazy person.
“Who’s fuckin’ funny now?”
“Definitely not you! I’m only laughing cause you’re torturing me!” I accidentally kicked the popcorn off the table, sending it flying everywhere.
He continued his assault, tickling my sides for I don’t know how long when he suddenly just stopped, catching me off guard. I caught my breath for a few seconds before I leaned up on my elbows to see what he was doing. Instantly jerking back, realizing his eyes were dead set on my faint C-section scar that could only be seen if you knew it was there.
The same one I still stared at all the time.
I froze in place, not knowing what to say or do. We had yet to breach the subject about the past, pretending as if it never existed to begin with. When he moved his hand, I stopped breathing. Knowing exactly what he was about to do. His fingers lightly touched along the faded memory of the day I was still so terrified and overwhelmed to remember. Although, the tips of his fingers were barely grazing my skin, that didn’t stop me from feeling the sensation all over.
Especially stabbing at my heart.
“Her name was Madison, we were goin’ to call her Maddie for short,” he said so low I could barely hear him. As if he was no longer in the present with me, he was somewhere else entirely stuck in the past. Lost in his own mind. “She was beautiful, Mia. I’d never seen anythin’ more beautiful in all my life.” His eyes filled with tears. It was the first time I saw him so vulnerable since her funeral. So exposed and so raw.