I am used to the siren after dealing with her all these years. It’s so strange. Because I am her. When I take in the water, I become a creature with no knowledge of my human existence, no knowledge of those I care about or my human aspirations. I become what I would have been if I’d never known life above the sea.
It’s terrifying to know I could lose myself to her. But it won’t happen here. Not in an environment that I control. I take comfort in the Ava-lee’s familiar surroundings.
But what I’m most concerned about right now is Riden. He appears all right, despite what I’ve just put him through. I dare to speak.
“Before,” I say, “when I was replenishing my abilities and you disobeyed orders by coming to observe me, you didn’t speak. And I didn’t come to my senses. I remained a siren the entire time. I wonder if it’s your voice, somehow, that does it?”
“What about when you’re underwater?” Riden asks. “I can’t speak to you then, but you’ve still managed to come to your senses three different times.”
“You’re right. Those times, you…”
“Kissed you,” he fills in.
Sorinda remains as apathetic as always as Riden continues talking. “When you saved us from Vordan, you held me under the water. I thought I was going to die, and the last thought I remember having was that I wanted to kiss you one more time before that happened.”
He’s never told me that before.…
“That’s when I came to,” I say, remembering. “And when you fell into the water during the storm, you were drowning again. The siren put her lips to yours to give you some air, so you wouldn’t die before she could have her fun. That’s when I was myself again.”
“And then during the battle,” Riden says, “I put my forehead to yours. Not quite a kiss, but it was close.”
I stare at him through the bars. “Why did you do that? You couldn’t have known what I was trying.”
“Somehow, I just thought that if I could get closer to you, maybe we wouldn’t die.”
It is not only the siren who reacts to Riden, then. He somehow knows how to handle her, too.
“Let’s go again,” I say, dipping my finger in the water once more.
Riden doesn’t object, so I draw it in.
*
Riden and I practice for hours. Each time, all he has to do is say my name, and I’m me again.
I can’t explain it. Riden is not the only one who has spoken to me while I was the siren. In the past, my father kept me contained while I was stocking up on my abilities. His voice didn’t bring me to. Tylon has seen me as a siren, tried speaking with me. That did nothing for me, either. Wallov and Deros have done it. A few other captains at the keep.
Nothing.
It’s Riden. Only Riden.
Chapter 16
That was close, wasn’t it? When next we meet, Alosa, you will face the full force of the Dragon’s Skull and my fleet. Things will go differently then.
ANY PROGRESS I thought I’d made with Riden the previous day feels insignificant when reminded of the sheer size of the fleet. So what if I can keep my mind while restocking my abilities? What am I to do against twenty ships? With the thirty more that may already be following behind them? Without the siren treasure to bribe my father’s men away from him, I don’t like our odds.
Only a few hours later, another note arrives.
I see you.
I climb the rigging all the way up to the crow’s nest. Even then, I have to squint to see the brown line on the horizon. There must be a good current back there, helping the fleet along. It sets my heart to pounding to see them so close.
I climb back down as quickly as possible.
“Go find me Radita,” I say to Niridia.
My father must be working his men into the ground, rotating them at the sweeps. They’ll be exhausted by the time they reach the Isla de Canta. But I don’t think that’s my father’s current goal. He only needs to catch me. Then they can rest before continuing on.
When Niridia returns with Radita in tow, I can’t get the words out fast enough.
“He’s gaining on us. Now that he has us in his sights, he won’t slow. What can we do to build speed?”
Radita’s answer is immediate. “We can’t do anything to the ship itself, but we could lighten her. The most effective way would be to throw the cannons overboard.”
“We can’t do that,” Niridia says. “Then if he catches us again, we have no way to fight!”
I don’t have solutions for anything. There’s sense in lightening the load and sense in keeping the cannons. It’s impossible to know which is the smarter choice right now.
“All right,” I say. “We don’t do anything yet. Roslyn!”
The lass isn’t on duty, but I need to quickly change that.
“Yes, Captain?” she asks, strolling over from where she was chatting with a group of the girls.
“I need you up top. You report to me immediately if the ships in the distance get larger. Understand?”
“Aye.” She scurries up.
“Search the ship, Radita,” I say. “See if there’s anything else we can toss over that will make a difference.”
“There isn’t any—”
“Just check, please!”
She shares a look with Niridia before going below.
“I’m not being unreasonable. Maybe she’s overlooking something. He can’t catch us, Niridia.”
“We beat him once,” she says, “we can do it again.”
“He won’t face us one-on-one this time. We can’t take on twenty ships.”
“That’s true,” she says. “But there’s nothing you can do to help the situation yet. Focus on practicing with Riden. I’ll oversee everything out here.”
*
I’d wanted to give Riden a break after what we accomplished yesterday. Being around me while I’m using my abilities isn’t easy on him. But the need to figure things out has become more urgent than ever.
I sigh in relief when Riden doesn’t give me any snark after I tell him we need to begin practicing again immediately.
He must be able to tell I’m on edge, though, because once we get to the brig he asks, “What’s wrong?”
“We can see the fleet from the crow’s nest. Father is pushing his men to the breaking point to catch us.”
“Then we’d better be ready for him.”
Under Sorinda’s watch, we spend the rest of the day learning the extent of my control over the siren in me.
Riden tries leaving the room—with his ears covered, of course—to see if distance affects the response the siren has to him. It does. He needs to be in my line of sight, or the siren blocks out his shouts.
He tries calling to me more and more quietly, until he doesn’t say anything at all, with the hopes that eventually just looking at him will be enough. But that doesn’t keep the siren at bay.
It’s his voice while he’s in my sights.
Nothing less.
I’d so hoped that maybe with practice, I could learn to control the siren on my own.
But after three more days with the same results, I’m forced to give up that notion. Still, so long as Riden is near, I can replenish my abilities and regain my senses immediately.