Riden breathes in deeply. “You’re doing it again, Alosa. You’re furious at yourself this time. You feel guilty for what could have happened. And you’re looking for a distraction.”
So what! I want to snap. How does he read me so damn well? Why does he keep the siren at bay? What is it about this blasted man?
Before I can say anything, his eyes land on my arm.
Where Sorinda cut me.
“Can I help you with that?” he asks.
If he expects me to keep my hands to myself, then no. “I’ve got it. Would you tell Niridia to send someone in here to get the water out of my tub?”
“Of course,” he says.
He leaves.
I head for my wardrobe and bandage my wound alone.
Chapter 17
I REQUIRE CONSTANT UPDATES on the fleet now. They’re drawing closer and closer. It occupies my mind at all hours of the day. That and the havoc I almost unleashed on my own ship.
On top of that is the guilt I feel at my parched crew. It’s so strong, I find myself taking my meals later than most, just so I don’t have to watch them drain their meager rations.
I sit down to my dinner a few days later, the galley nearly empty. Kearan and Enwen are at a table together, Enwen doing all the talking, of course. Kearan slumps in his seat, the rationing affecting him more than the others. He’s refused to drink rum with his dinner.
“What you need, Kearan, is to take your mind off things,” Enwen says.
“How am I supposed to do that?”
“Want to hear a joke?”
“No.”
“A pirate at sea has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch. One of his companions asks him how he lost his leg.”
“Please stop,” Kearan begs.
“He answers, ‘A cannonball.’ Then his companion asks how he lost his hand. He answers, ‘A sword.’”
“Enwen, I will knock you unconscious,” Kearan threatens, but I can tell he doesn’t have the energy to carry it out.
“When the companion asks how he lost his eye, the man says, ‘A spray of the sea.’”
Kearan stares at Enwen. “That doesn’t even make any sense.”
“It was his first day with the hook.”
Kearan groans and leans his head down on the table.
I grin at the two of them, if only to mask the guilt building within my chest. I wish my abilities included extracting salt from water.
Across the galley, only one other duo is seated: Wallov and Roslyn. Roslyn upturns her cup over her mouth, trying to get the last drops. She sets the cup down, looks at her father, whispers something to him.
He hands her his own cup.
I stand so quickly the bench behind me tips over.
“Wallov,” I say, perhaps too sharply, “don’t.”
Kearan and Enwen’s bickering instantly quiets, their attention now drawn to the scene I’m making.
“She’s so thirsty, Captain,” Wallov says.
“We’re all thirsty. But no one will die under the current rationing. If you start giving your shares to her, you will die. She won’t thank you then.”
I turn my attention to little Roslyn next. “You are never to accept his portions. Do you understand? It will be hard, and your throat and belly will hurt, but you will lose your papa if you take his water.”
She swallows, never breaking eye contact with me. “I understand, Captain. He won’t hear any complaints from me again.”
Such conviction from someone so small. I believe her.
“We’ll be upon that island soon,” I say. “Then we can all drink our fill.”
The two nod at me.
When I take my empty plate and cup up to Trianne, I tell her, “You watch those two.”
“Aye, Captain.”
I’m still thinking over the exchange when I get back up top. I’m forcing a father to watch his daughter wilt away in front of him.
Niridia rushes to me, pulling me from my thoughts. “We have a problem.”
“What is it?”
“We can see them now.”
My gaze turns toward the horizon behind us, where that brown line is darker than ever. From the crow’s nest, one can see miles farther than on the deck. If I can see the fleet now with my naked eye—
“He’s taunting us,” I bite out. Keeping himself in our sights, now. He’ll keep at it for days if he wants. Not drawing closer, just invoking fear.
It’s what he excels at.
My suspicions about his brutal games are confirmed just a few days later. He’s grown closer, but not by much.
Radita has brought me no new ideas for how we can make the ship lighter. It’s the cannons or nothing at all.
I can count the days we have left before we’re completely out of water on my fingers. The fleet is right there.
Half the crew is staring over the railing behind us, watching the fleet draw closer. And closer.
“Land ho!”
A few cheers float up on the air, but they’re only half-hearted; the stamina of my crew is at an all-time low.
But we have a bigger problem.
We cannot stop with the king on our heels. If we do, he’ll catch us for sure. It could take us hours trekking on the new island before we find water. Then more time still to haul it back to the ship.
Time is the very thing we don’t have right now.
Kearan and I take turns looking through the telescope and examining the Allemos map. In the end, our findings are in agreement. It’s the large island from the map. We’re so close to the Isla de Canta. It’s just past this island we’re approaching now. And through the telescope we can make out a junglelike terrain. So green. So full of water.
My stomach drops at our salvation right ahead of us, our doom right behind us. We cannot have one without the other.
Those who were staring behind us at the fleet now turn their gazes toward the bow. Toward their hope.
“How many should go ashore, Captain?” Niridia asks.
So many hands go up into the air.
“You need me,” Athella says.
“I will not be left behind,” Deshel says defiantly.
“Please take me this time.” That comes from little Roslyn.
So many hopeful faces, so many bodies desperate to go ashore and find water first.
“None,” I croak.
So many eyes widen. So many thirsty mouths swallow. So many of them stare at me as though I’ve suddenly sprouted a tail.
“None?” Niridia asks. “Captain, I was speaking of the island. The very green island that’s sure to have water.”
“I know. I didn’t misunderstand. We cannot stop.”
“We’re dying!” Deshel insists.
I point emphatically at the fleet behind us. “If we stop, they catch us. We’re dead.”
“If we don’t stop, we die of thirst!”
Sorinda appears on the deck, where everyone can actually see her. “I’m with the captain. We should keep going.”
Mandsy speaks up. “I’ve had too many bodies resting in the shade of the infirmary from heat exhaustion. Captain, we have to stop. We won’t make it otherwise.”
“Alosa—” Niridia starts.
“No, don’t Alosa me. I said we’re not stopping.”
Kearan looks apologetically at Sorinda before saying, “I don’t know how much longer I can continue like this. I’m probably the biggest body on the ship and the most dehydrated. I don’t know that I can get us to the Isla de Canta if I don’t get more water soon.”
“The captain gave her orders,” Sorinda bites out. “We’re not stopping.”
Riden, I notice, is over at the side of the ship, saying nothing. Does he not have an opinion?