“God, I can’t believe you’re almost thirty weeks already!” Keegan said, as she stabbed pieces of lettuce with her fork.
“The time really is passing by,” Donna interjected.
“Y’all are crazy. It’s dragging ass, if you ask me,” I grumbled.
They both smiled at me. I had met the ladies in Athens to get something to eat, and to discuss what things I needed or wanted at my baby shower. I really didn’t come for the conversation, I came for the food. This place had amazing dishes. And I really wanted their cookie skillet with vanilla ice cream for dessert. We’d arrived about twenty minutes ago, and just got our food. My mouth was watering, but the food was keeping me in high spirits while they chatted about things that didn’t interest me.
“What? I realize you’ve been pregnant like twelve times, Donna.” I was exaggerating to drive home my point. “Did you honestly go through your whole pregnancy not feeling exhausted and ready for it to be done?”
She scoffed. “Oh, honey, I absolutely did. Don’t get me wrong I loved carrying all of my boys. But it is a lot of stress on the body. And you’re not even in the home stretch.”
“Well, that’s encouraging.”
She chortled. “I’ll tell you a little story.”
Keegan and I perked up and leaned in to listen.
“When I was pregnant with Camden, I couldn’t believe how big I’d gotten. I was even smaller then than I am now. I couldn’t wrap my mind around how much I stretched and changed to support this new baby. Well, one day, Paul came home and he found me sitting in the middle of the floor bawling my eyes out because I no longer felt petite and capable of doing anything besides waddling around like a miniature whale.”
I nodded in agreement. My new form was making me waddle as well.
“He approached me, cautiously, because I’d been quite emotional. When he spoke, I swear it was like nails on a chalk board. I swore up and down that he’d done this to me. Him even breathing the same air as me was enough to make me want to ring his handsome little neck. Anyway back then, smoking was still a thing. When our parents came to town, they smoked like a chimney.” Her southern drawl was making me bite my tongue to not interrupt with my laughing. “When I saw Paul that day, I couldn’t deal. There was an ashtray within reaching distance and let’s just say I took my chance to practice my pitching. The moment he spoke, I picked that ashtray right up and I threw it at him. I didn’t pay any mind to whether it would hurt him, or break into a million pieces. I just wanted to sit there in my own misery and tears ‘til Camden decided to get out of me.”
“Oh my gosh, that’s too funny.” Keegan said. “Paul must’ve thought you’d lost your mind.”
“No, dear, I’d lost my mind well before then.”
I giggled. “Somehow I doubt that.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because you’re always full of grace and poise.”
“Just because I show calmness on the outside doesn’t mean I am always that way inside.”
I sat and thought about that for a moment. A server came by, refilled our water glasses and asked if we needed anything. I asked for a few wedges of lemon.
“Was Paul okay?”
“Haven’t you heard the story about when Camden was born?”
Keegan burst out laughing. “I saw the pictures, but I didn’t realize that’s why he had stitches.”
I must’ve looked confused.
“The ashtray hit him in the corner of his forehead. Blood was everywhere. I still have no idea if it was the excitement of the day, or if Camden was simply ready to come out, but while we were at the hospital getting Paul stitched up, my water broke.”
“Oh my god, that’s hysterical. And talk about timing.”
“Anyway, enough about me. Let’s talk about you, and what you’d like at your baby shower.”
Ugh. I honestly didn’t even want a party. My days seemed to consist of working, eating everything in sight, and sleeping. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to celebrate the baby coming, but I almost wished it wasn’t considered rude to have a party without the pregnant lady in attendance. I mean, couldn’t people just bring a present, play their weird baby games, and leave. Nobody would really miss me.
“I don’t really know what I want or need,” I replied.
“She has some of the baby room together, but maybe I can help her come up with a list of things she still needs,” Keegan added.
“Don’t forget to include bigger items in that. You never know what people are willing to buy.”
“I can take care of the big things. I’ve got the crib already, and a rocking chair. I just don’t have a swing, and that bouncing thing.”
Donna raised her brow. “What about a car seat, stroller, high chair, bath tub . . . there’s a ton of things you really don’t think about until you go to a store and register.”
“All of that feels like begging.” I only say that because it’s me. I could provide for my child. But if it were someone else, I’d be telling them the same thing.
“Take Dodger and find a baby store to register at. I promise it’s okay. Now, what about the cake?”
“Now we’re talking.”
Keegan smiled. “I’m going to order one from that lady who did Camden’s and my wedding cake. I’ve been looking at some of her designs online and I have something picked out.”
“Do I even get a say on the flavor?”
“Of course,” she said.
“Good, ‘cause I really think a marble cake will cover the bases for everyone. I’d like all chocolate, but it’ll be good for people who want something vanilla.”
“Are you opposed to carrot?” Donna wondered.
“Not at all.”
She spoke to Keegan. “Ask them to do a top layer in carrot. It’ll appeal to the older ladies that will be attending.” She looked back to me. “Now, I know you said you preferred something smaller, like an intimate get together. It’s going to be a little bigger than that. We have some friends from church that are dying to get the newest Brooks member a gift. Think you’re okay with that?”
I eye balled both of their plates. Keegan had set her silverware down and she still had half a salad. Donna had barely even touched her stuffed chicken. My plate of chicken piccata was gone.
“Erm, are you both done with your plates?”
They both looked at what they had, then at my empty plate. Keegan broke out laughing.
“Here, have mine.”
Donna followed suit. “Baby boy must be growing like a weed in there.” She was sitting next to me and she rubbed my stomach.
It was endearing that she doted so much. My own mother had definitely come around and she wanted to be here today to help with the planning, but she had a meeting that she couldn’t miss. Donna told her she would call her later and fill her in. My family was really coming together.
“So has Dodger brought up the idea of marriage at all?” Keegan asked, dropping a bomb in the middle of the table that I didn’t want to talk about.
“No.”
“I bet it’s coming.” She clapped happily.
“Hopefully not.”