My heart was breaking for her and we'd only just met. I smiled, and she went right to work. It was starting to get cold out and she was dressed in summer clothes, so I placed the blanket over her shoulders and she snuggled right into it.
I took another deep breath before turning to face Austin. He was intently staring at us. As if everything he ever wanted was a few feet away from him.
I saw it.
For a moment, my Austin was peeking through the haze.
I walked toward him, dragging him to the furthest spot on the balcony, away from her, so she wouldn’t hear us.
I didn’t falter. I couldn’t. If I did, the love I had for him would win and that wasn’t going to happen tonight. Not after all this.
“Did you know she was here?” I gritted out, pointing at Molly.
He looked back over at the little girl who was happy as could be and then immediately peered down at the ground, rubbing the back of his neck.
I scoffed, shaking my head in pure utter disbelief.
“You knew she was fucking here? You knew someone brought a child? And you still let it happen? What the fuck is wrong with you?” I shoved his chest.
“Baby…” He stepped toward me and I instantly stepped back, placing my hand out in front of me.
“How fucked up are you right now? She was playing with drugs, Austin. Reaching for a fucking needle when I found her,” I snapped, trying to keep my voice at bay. Even though all I wanted to do was scream at him.
He winced before I had the last word out, it was quick but I saw it.
“Who are you?” I breathed out unable to control my emotions.
His dilated eyes widened and mine filled with tears. I turned to look out over the city. Instead of the man I barely recognized anymore.
“Who the fuck are you right now? I don’t even know you anymore,” I bellowed with tears streaming down my face. I looked back at him. “My Austin… the man I love, would have never let a kid come into this apartment tonight. He would have never put a little girl’s life in danger. What if I didn’t find her when I did? What if she took a hand full of fucking pills, Austin?”
He just stood there with a confused look on his face, not understanding the severity of the situation.
“The man you were a few years ago, would have never been so fucked up not to care,” I cried, sucking in air that wasn’t available for the taking.
His hands reached out for me again, but I slapped them away.
“Daisy, I love you. I’m sor—”
“Yeah.” I nodded not allowing him to finish. “You’re always fucking sorry. How about this, Austin? How about try to not have to be sorry for anything, how about that? Huh?”
He rubbed the back of his head again. He was so fucked up he couldn’t even come up with a string of excuses. His mind not catching up with his bullshit justifications.
I wiped away all my tears, but it was no use. They were coming down hard and unforgiving.
“Just go. Just go back inside. Go to your junkie friends. Go back to your drugs. Because that’s all that matters to you anymore,” I viscously spewed even though it killed me.
Even though I didn’t want it to be true. Even though I prayed every night that he would come back to me.
That our love would prevail over his demons.
“That’s not true. You’re all that matters to me,” he argued with a stern tone, pushing through the emotionless state. “I fucking love you. I made a mistake, okay? I’m not perfect, and I never claimed to be. I’m sorry. I’ll make it right,” he pleaded with sincerity laced his voice.
“It’s too late. You’re too late. Just fucking go. Get out of my damn face. I can’t look at you when you’re like this anymore. You make me sick. Get those people out of my fucking apartment. Now!” I yelled, letting my anger take over.
I looked back at the little girl. She didn’t seem fazed. Which only made me realize she was around this a lot. My heart broke for her even more.
“Our apartment, Briggs. Our fucking apartment,” he stated, making me peer back at him.
He had an expression I couldn’t read. He tried to reach for me again, but I just turned around not saying another word. It was pointless to talk to him right now. I walked toward the little girl, turning my back on the one person I had ever loved.
I heard him take a deep long breath before he walked back inside, shutting the doors behind him. I wiped away the tears on my face that seem to keep falling, absentmindedly rubbing my stomach. I couldn’t remember if I had eaten at all that day. I sat down next to her, grabbing a color pencil to help.
“This is beautiful, Molly.”
She smiled and it lit up her entire face. I didn’t understand how someone wasn’t taking care of her. She was such an innocent little girl.
“Where are your parents?”
She shrugged.
“So, who did you come here with?”
“My daddy.”
“Where’s your mommy?”
She bit her lip, grabbing another color pencil.
“Maybe we can call your mommy to come get you, do you know her number?” I coaxed, pulling out my cell phone.