They were devastating and merciless.
I grabbed onto the cold railing, taking a deep breath as the wind blew against my face, producing a new high I had yet to experience. I rested my head back relishing in the vibrations against my soul. I had no control over my body, placing one foot on the railing, the other slowly after.
The music was smooth like silk, but raw like nails, clawing at my skin, burrowing inside me, making its self at home.
My mind.
My body.
My soul.
I climbed through the wires to stand on the rusted ledge, steadying myself once my feet met my hands. Gradually balancing before slowly standing tall. My thoughts bleeding off of me right onto the oncoming traffic. I felt the vibes all around me even though I still hadn’t opened my eyes to take it all in.
I was caught up in the silence, I could finally believe. Lifting my arms out beside me like an angel ready to fly away. Riding the white wave to my sense of wonder.
Freedom.
I sucked in deep breaths, my heart beating so fucking hard. I thought the pounding would knock me over from the force of my own rage. The song hitting it’s all-time high and just when the thought of letting go came over me.
Giving into the release.
The beat slowed, the song coming to an end. The chaos quieted down all around me.
I opened my eyes.
Gasping.
The force so powerful, so crippling, so fucking real that it jerked my body back against the wire cables, my hands immediately gripping the iron ropes to the point of pain.
For a moment I had silence.
For a second I found my peace.
Even if it almost just cost me…
My life.
Chapter 12
<>Austin<>
It had been a month since I dropped out of college.
It had been a month since I left and hadn’t looked back once.
It had been a month since I started living.
I got the fuck out of California, leaving all the bullshit behind. I took the first flight available to Ohio, not bothering to tell anyone. As far as I was concerned no one existed to me anymore. The only stop I made was by our apartment to grab enough shit to fit in my duffle bag. I went straight to the airport and picked the next flight departing, getting the hell out of Ohio.
Which happened to be Miami, Florida.
I met some random chick on the plane and followed her back to her apartment, where we fucked for the next three days. I didn’t mind, she had nice tits and let me fuck them, too. Plus it was a place I could crash for a few days till I got my shit together.
My phone was blowing up with phone calls and text messages from everyone and their mother. After a week of not answering or replying you’d think they’d take the goddamn hint, but it only made them bother me more.
I replied to one text.
“I’m fine, Half-Pint. I’ll keep in touch when I can. Goodbye.”
And I threw away my phone.
I was living off odd end jobs, here and there, enough to get me through without settling any roots. I was technically homeless, crashing with friend’s that I met partying or a new *’s bed, more often than not.
I was having the time of my life.
I lit my cigarette as we walked into the party, blowing smoke into the air. The pretty blonde I picked up at the bar said she was going to some house party on South Beach.
Never being one to pass up a good time, I decided to go with her.
We arrived around one in the morning, having a few drinks while she eye-fucked the shit out me before leaving the bar. The house was packed by the time we walked in, barely enough room to pass through the crowds of people as I followed her to the makeshift bar.
“What’s your poison?” she asked.
“Whiskey neat.”
She cocked her head to the side. “A Jack Daniel’s boy, huh?’
“Yes, ma’am,” I drawled out with a grin.
I had already forgotten her name. Nothing new for me, chick’s faces and names always blended together. I never stayed around long enough or cared enough to remember who they were.
“Ma’am, huh?” She flirted.
“I’m just a Southern boy,” I simply stated.
She slowly nodded. “Is it true what they say about boys from down South?”
“Depends who you’re asking.” I smiled.
She introduced me to some of her friends she found inside. We hung out, drinking, dancing and shooting the shit about nothing in particular. I needed a break from the stifling atmosphere. Excusing myself, I made my way out onto the empty balcony, wanting a change of scenery. It was hotter than Hell in there, and I wasn’t a fan of big crowds to begin with.
I lit the blunt that was in my pocket, sucking in a deep, long breath, holding it in. I leaned against the railing, resting on my forearms, overlooking Miami Beach. Taking in the soft lure of the waves of the ocean, the moon smiled down on me like a Cheshire cat. There was mixture of smoke and salt in the air surrounding me. The beach brought back such a familiar feeling, and for the first time a sense of longing came over me.