"Two dishes this year, sweetheart? I see your usual potato au gratin, but what's this? Green bean casserole? Great! It's been a while since I've had that. I'm looking forward to it."
I open my mouth to warn her that Cassie made it, but if I can't laugh at her getting drunk on spiked eggnog, then I'll have to get my fun another way.
"Yeah, make sure you load up your fork, Mom. You won't have tasted anything like it before." Not unless you've licked the inside of a nuclear reactor.
I kiss her on the forehead before taking the eggnog out to the living room and serving it to everyone. After the first sip, we can all tell it's way too light on the alcohol, and Dad doesn't waste any time topping up our glasses with some of his most expensive brandy.
Cassie sips at her glass cautiously.
"You okay?" I ask.
She nods and steps closer to me so she can whisper. "Just making sure I don't get drunk in front of your parents. I'm struggling with my self control tonight, and sloppy-groping you under the dinner table might not be the best way to impress my future in-laws."
"Maybe not, but it would sure as hell impress me."
I lean down and kiss her cheek. Then her ear. Then the side of her neck. There's something taboo about being turned on by her in my childhood home, so of course I now have an erection roughly the size of the Freedom Tower.
I wrap my arm around her waist and pull her against me. The pressure of her body helps a little, but I'd have to get a whole lot closer for true relief. Her eyes go wide when she registers how hard I am.
"Ethan," she whispers and glances briefly over to where my dad is chatting with Elissa and Josh before looking down at my crotch. "If you rub that thing on me again, I won't be held responsible for what I do in front of your family. For the sake of my dignity, and what little modesty I have left, put it away."
I stroke her back and grind just a little. "Where exactly should I put it? I have a few ideas, but I'd like to hear yours."
She looks at me in a way that screams she's aroused and pissed. Probably pissed because she's aroused. That combination isn't helping me be less turned on.
"Ethan, I'm not kidding. Stop looking at me like I’m tonight’s main course and deflate that thing. De-stiffen it. Un-woodify it. Anything. Just stop making me want you in front of your family. Otherwise, I'm going to have to resort to the one method I know will make him go away." She looks toward the front hall.
I chuckle. "Tell me you're not talking about having sex in the downstairs bathroom while my family sips eggnog."
"Of course not," she says with incredulity before tugging down my head so she can whisper in my ear. "I was thinking more like in your bed upstairs. That wooden headboard is pretty sturdy. It would be great for gripping while I ride you. Just saying."
"Jesus, Cassie." I drop my head onto her shoulder. "You gotta stop saying things like that. I'm aching like a son-of-a-bitch over here."
She picks up a nearby magazine and fans herself. "You think your boner hurts? Let me tell you, when a girl gets super turned on, everything swells and aches and throbs. It's more than painful. It's torture. And being like this when I can't do anything about it only makes it worse."
I step away from her and run my fingers through my hair. I thought we were kidding around, but now that she's conjured an image of her riding me in my childhood bed, I can't get rid of it. I've never had sex in that bed. It's seen plenty of hand action over the years and a small amount of heavy petting, but never the full show. I'd like nothing better than to take Cassie upstairs right now and remedy that.
"You know," Cassie says as she runs her fingers over my pecs. "You could make an excuse that you want to show me something upstairs. We could be done in five minutes. Less if you put your mouth on me."
I'm about to crack and do what she wants when Mom calls, "Okay, everyone. Take your seats. Dinner's ready."
Dad carries in a platter holding a huge bird, and the rest of the table is covered in platters of delicious-looking food. Everything smells so good, I'm momentarily distracted from my need to be inside Cassie.
Everyone takes their seats as Dad carves the turkey, but when Cassie goes to follow, I grab her hand and pull her back to me.
"You're pure evil for getting me this turned on right before dinner. Be prepared for punishment later."
"Fine by me," she mutters.
"Also ... how about we not tell anyone you made the green bean casserole until after they've tried it? It'll be a surprise."
She glances at everyone sitting at the table. "Okay, sure. That could be fun. I can't wait to hear what they think."
It's only now I realize this whole thing could backfire. I've been thinking about how funny it will be to see my family's reaction to her food, but I forgot she'd be here to witness it. If they react how I predict, she'll be crushed. As we take our seats, I try and figure out how to best handle the situation.