The roof cracked overhead as she said, “It would seem I have underestimated you.”
I snorted. “No shit. Maybe next time, don’t come in here pimping a half-naked guy when I already have someone’s junk to play with. Not cool, Grandma. Not fucking cool.”
She nodded. “I see that now,” she said slowly, and her skin began to sag and wrinkle as she aged right in front of me. The walls were shaking. “I wish there could be another way.”
“There doesn’t need to be,” I said, attempting a rakish grin that I didn’t quite feel. “In case you didn’t know, I’m Sam of Wilds. I can take whatever’s coming our way.”
“I hope you remember that,” she said. “When the time comes.”
The roof caved in and I—
Chapter 10: The We-Hate-Sam-A-Lots
I OPENED my eyes.
Only to find myself lying on the ground, squinting up toward the sky. And since everyone I know couldn’t be normal, I had Mom, Dad, Tiggy, Gary, the King, Justin, Randall, Morgan, Kevin, and Ryan all staring down at me with the same weird look on their faces.
“You’re all a bunch of creepy-ass motherfuckers,” I said. “Sorry, Mom.”
“Your little towel thing fell off,” Gary said. “During your stoned dream quest vision gypsy thing.”
Gods, I felt like shit. Like we’d spent the night drinking apple wine and I didn’t understand the meaning of the word moderation. “Oh?”
“Yeah.” Gary nodded solemnly. “Your bits and bobs were just flopping all over the place.”
“That sounds about right.” I scrubbed my hand over my face. “So of course you all are staring down at me now.”
“I just had to make sure your testicles were all right,” Kevin rumbled. “Because I care.”
I groaned as I pushed myself up, trying to breathe past the shooting pain in my head. The runes on my skin were dead, the magic depleted, but they still itched. I saw someone had had the decency to cover me up. Probably Ryan, as he tended to get uncomfortable if anyone else saw me naked. (“It’s weird, Sam, you don’t just forget to put on pants!” Uh, yeah, smartass, sometimes I did.) Ryan knelt beside me, running a hand up my back, a worried look on his face.
“I’m okay,” I said, giving him a weak smile.
“Really,” he said in that tone that meant bullshit.
“Well, reasonably okay. As okay as one can be when one has seen the destruction of Verania, a star dragon that predicted my birth, and a bad guy who denied he monologued, but then monologued anyway about how he was going to destroy me. Oh, and he might have been covered in shadows and then tried to mind suck me a little bit. Or something. I don’t even know. I feel slightly vomity right now.”
They all stared at me some more.
“Freaking weirdos,” I mumbled, “with your staring and your faces.”
Randall groaned. “Nothing is ever easy with you, is it?”
I glared up at him, squinting against the afternoon sun. “Oh yes, because it’s my fault I got whammied by my grandma.”
“Phrasing,” Dad said, reaching down to grab my hand and pull me to my feet. I felt dizzy as I stood. Ryan had an arm firmly wrapped around my waist, supporting my weight against him as my knees felt like jelly.
“What did she do to you?” Ryan muttered in my ear, and for a moment, I had a flash of him both young and old, skin sallow, eyes closed, clutching his sword in his hands.
“Showed me her version of the truth,” I said through gritted teeth. “Where is she?”
Mom tossed a glare over her shoulder before stepping aside. “She blew that powder in your face. And you started convulsing.” She was angry. More so than I’d seen in a long time. “Then her eyes rolled back in her head and she collapsed when you did. You were both out for almost twenty minutes.”
“We couldn’t get her to let go of your hand,” Dad said. “Not without hurting either one of you.”
“I wanted to break her wrist,” Mom said. “But your father wouldn’t let me.”
“So bloodthirsty,” I said in awe.
“I wasn’t trying to stop you,” Dad said. “I was trying to get Ryan to give me his sword so I could chop off her hand.”
“Such violence,” I whispered. “Those are my parents.”
“So we just tried to pry you apart, but it didn’t work very well,” Mom said.
I shook my head. “She needed it. To maintain connection. She was there too. She…. I was her. And she showed me things.” I looked up, vision clearing slightly.
Vadoma was sitting on the ground, head in her hands, muttering something to Ruv, who crouched down next to her. Her tone was quick and clipped, but I couldn’t make out anything she was saying, if she was even speaking Veranian. Ruv glanced back at us, gaze finding me almost instantly. His expression was blank, but it was enough to cause Ryan to harrumph and pull me tighter against him. I didn’t complain because I was sure I was going to be awkwardly clingy toward him for a while yet while I parsed through what Vadoma had shown me.
“Is she all right?” I asked Ruv.
He hesitated, eyes searching mine, as if trying to gauge my sincerity. He must have found me worthy, because he said, “She’ll be fine. It’s draining on her to perform that level of magic. She is not a wizard like you. You draw from the earth. She draws from her blood.”
“Have you seen what she showed me?”
He shook his head. “It was not for my eyes. It was meant for you.”
“But she thinks you’re a part of it,” I said, and Ryan tensed beside me. “She thinks that you will be my cornerstone.”
He shrugged, looking younger than he had before, more vulnerable. “We don’t know what fate has in store for us. The paths are many, Sam of Wilds. Ours could converge.”
“There is no path for you with him,” Ryan said. “I’m sorry that you were misled, but you cannot have what doesn’t belong to you.”
“And does he belong to you, Knight Commander?” Ruv said, cocking his head like a bird. “Because in all our conversations, you’ve spoken of him like an object and not a man. Someone of his strength and caliber cannot be possessed like you seem so fond of doing.”
“Oh, girl,” Gary breathed. “Shit’s about to get for real right now.”
“My money on Knight Delicious Face,” Tiggy said.
“You don’t have any money, kitten,” Gary said. “Remember? We were cruelly forced to invest it because Morgan said otherwise we’d be frivolous and buy things like brooms and scarves, which, in all fairness, is completely true.”
“Aw.” Tiggy crossed his arms over his chest and pouted. “I never get anything.”
“Ask them if they’ll get naked and cover themselves in oil before they fight,” Kevin hissed. “It makes it more erotic—I mean, it makes it hard. Er. Harder to fight. Therefore making it even. And erotic.”
“There’s going to be no naked oil wrestling,” I snapped. “And if there is, it’s only going to be between Ryan and me. Ryan, hand me my trousers. I’d rather not be naked when I’m talking about you and me being naked.”