Where Would I Be Without You

Chapter Fourteen

A few months later, with a good bit of management courses completed, things were looking up. It might have helped that with each course completed; Mason promised me a romantic date. Yesterday, I completed another course with glee in my heart knowing that after I volunteered this morning at the Senior Center in the morning, he had a planned date for the evening. This Sunday was a romantic date in the city, in a horse carriage ride, to a dinner on a roof top restaurant and followed with a walk through a park that is filled with twinkling lights for couples.

Marion was starting to look like she had swallowed a beach ball. A small one. When I looked at her directly, I saw a small bump, but when she turned sideways in a tight shirt, there they were, the twins. We spent most days talking about baby rearing and reading baby articles to each other instead of my chaotic drama. It seemed as if from the day in the hospital, as soon as Mason and I recommitted to each other, all my unlucky chaos just seemed to disappear. Marion and I joked that all good things can't last, and we should prepare for the next round of adventure. However, I knew deep in my heart, that falling in love with Mason had been the most grownup thing I had ever done. Besides, twins, one boy, one girl, could cause enough chaos for all of us. We were going to have our hands full.

Of course, plans can change; they always do. Somehow though, I got the impression that Mason and I made a great team in compromising. Like the fact that we spent almost every Sunday from noon to three at his parents for brunch. I didn't mind as I was starting to feel like one of the family. It might have helped that his sisters and mother treated me better than my own family. Mason knew how to deal with me after I might have a bad mom experience with my mother, and he had picked my dad up from the bar a few times without trying to let me know. I thought it was sweet, as we both had discussed that it was a problem we can only deal with by not letting him drive drunk. However, Mason's biggest compromise of all was when he asked me to marry him, and I told him not until I finished the management course. Although, as soon as I said that, he quit trying to persuade me from studying, to do other entertaining things, like have sex. We were not doing so good on the Catholic thing, but I had a great study partner who wanted me to get this course done in six months instead of the typical year to two years it takes a full-time worker to accomplish.

As I walked out of the Senior Center where I volunteered, there he stood. Dark hair freshly cut, a bouquet of flowers, dressed in nice khaki slacks, leather loafers and a blue silk dress shirt that made his eyes pop with color. And if I wasn't mistaken, there was a bit of mischievousness to them.

"Hello gorgeous, how were your listeners?" I knew he was referring to the seniors I read to; they were always appreciative. However, for the old men, the fact that I always dressed up in my Sunday best might make them a bit more pleasant. Today I was wearing a soft pink dress that curved my body and flowed gracefully. Sophia, Mason's mom, had made it for me in practice for my bridesmaid dresses she wanted to make. It turns out, she's a great sewer.

After I kissed him, I took the bouquet of flowers and sniffed them, and then I gave him a wink. "The seniors were great as always. So are these for me or are we taking them to your mom's?" I was referring to the flowers as he always brought his mom something on Sundays, usually wine or flowers, but often he would surprise everyone with a really sentimental gift like an old picture of them framed or all the family recipes put into digital files. I really liked having a romantic boyfriend. Even if it was his youngest sister helping in making him look like the perfect son.

He opened the passenger-side door to his black BMW and winked. "I have a little something in store for you."

I climbed into his car and reached for my seatbelt to buckle up, just as he closed the door, he practically danced around the front of the car to the driver side. As soon as he got in, I gave him the one eye raised eyebrow look. "What is it?" I teased.

"You'll see. By the way, Carl took me to the car repair shop, so I could pick up your car for repair. I don't know why you insisted on buying another used-car lot special. Any ways, it's at the apartment parking space."

"Thanks. I guess I figured why wreck a new car, when a used car is cheaper." I teased with referral to my car wreck not so long ago.

"I see. Well, when we are married, I am going to buy you a new car." He stated it so affirmatively, and then he added. "If you'll let me, dear." He was learning quickly.

"I suppose." I laughed, but deep down, I could see a few advantages to marrying a man who was financially on the upside. So did my mother, she was thrilled about it. Come to think of it, ever since we announced our engagement, my mother hadn't said one bad thing. I guess I could scratch pleasing my mother off my thirty-year-old plan, in fact, after meeting Mason, there were a lot of things I could scratch off and that pleased me tremendously.

Just as we pulled up in front of an elegant old Victorian house that was nestled among other old homes turned into businesses, I noticed the sign. Bernstein Private Jeweler. When Mason had asked me to marry him, it had been after one of his famous planned dates. He had given me his great grandma's antique ring as a symbol, but asked if we could go shopping for a ring when I had time, which seemed fewer and fewer as I was rushing with every spare minute to get this management course done, so I could marry him. Me and my personal promises to myself - ugh, but I was sticking this one out to prove not only to myself, but everyone else.

When I turned to look at Mason, he had that kid in the candy store look. "I can't wait for you to pick out the biggest diamond so that the whole world can see how much I love you."

I unclipped my seat belt and leaned over to gather his face in my hands. I gave him a quick kiss and pulled back, still holding his face. "It's not the diamond size that matters, but the thought."

He laughed. "That's what you women tell us when you are telling your girlfriends that size matters." We both started to laugh, because there was a bit of truth to that, however, in that department, Mason had no worries, no worries at all.

We walked up the sidewalk together with a hitch in both our steps. His grandma's ring was lovely, but I knew this meant a lot to him as he had been bugging me to do this. Now that we were here, I think I was excited to have a ring that he buys me on my finger. A little materialistic part of me could not wait to shove it into the faces of the females at work that kept stating that they thought Mason came from a rich family.

Three hours later and about a hundred different rings tried on, we came away with purchasing a beautiful two-caret diamond ring with a gold band. I think Mr. Bernstein was happy to have me finally make my choice as he had several customers in the store and only two other helpers that day.

As soon as we walked into his mom's kitchen, I walked with my hand forward and an 'oh my would you look at that' look on my face. The four women swooned around my hand as Mason said something about catching the game on TV with the other husbands. It had a sweet ring to it, all the way around.

By the time we left his mother's house around three, the late-summer storm clouds blew in fast and furious. Running to get into his car in pouring rain, in a soft pink dress that became see-though when it was wet, had Mason smiling. Such a man he is.

Then I saw him start up his car and reach for his cell phone. Before he backed out of his parent's driveway, he had canceled the carriage ride on account of the weather. Then he turned to me. "You ok if we postpone this date, seeing as the weather for our outdoor date has put a damper on things?"

"Sure. Besides, I am so full from your mom's cooking that I don't think I want to eat anytime soon."

As he back out of the driveway, he tossed me one of his sultry looks that warmed me with shivers. "Besides, with that dress see through now, I have other ideas."

We both started to giggle; because that was one thing, he always came through on.

After our lovemaking, we found ourselves sitting on my apartment window bench seat at the early hours of six p.m. The storm had only intensified and we both loved to sit and watch the storm in the sky the best we could from the window seat. Sitting in nothing under our bathroom robes, me nestled in his arms, sitting between his legs, I sighed heavily.

He whispered against my ear. "What's up?"

"Oh nothing really. I was just thinking how when we get our first home, I would love to have a window like this, so we could sit like this, and watch the storms over the mountains."

"That can be done. Want to start looking? I was going to tell you I've been looking, but you've been spending every extra second finishing this management course." He kissed the side of my neck, and I let out a soft moan.

"Yeah. I mean, we can look, but I don't want to move into the house until after we are married. What would your Catholic relatives think?" I teased.

"Who cares? They already know that I moved into your apartment, and I know you and Marion have spent the last two weeks nonstop talking about wedding plans instead of your typical baby talk. Carl told me. Not to mention the talk in the kitchen today with you and my sisters, and my mother at the brunch table. With the way you guys have so much planned out; we could get married next week." He teased.

"Ok." I let it out there so calm and collected that I wasn't sure if he heard.

When he finally turned me in his arms towards him and looked me in the eyes, I saw his excitement. "Really? You mean that? Because if you do, I'll pay the church extra to get us in next weekend."

I laughed. "Well, not next weekend. But I think you've shown me the most support on this management course. How would getting married now make any difference?" I sat back down on the cushion seat, facing him and held out my new engagement ring, looking at it in awe. "Besides, life gets off course and having you by my side as my husband makes it that much easier to deal with. This living in sin thing is killing my Catholic side of the family, well except for my aunt, but I don't think she is a Catholic, she just says she is to keep the family off her back. I have a good feeling that you will help me no matter what career or family decision I make in the future. I love my job as it is, and I only took the management course for my mom, and well for Wally too, but I don't know if I really want that job. I do want to finish the courses though, just so I see it through, and in case I change my mind. Because I am a woman after all, and we tend to do that sometimes." We both laughed.

"As long as you don't change your mind about me." He joked.

"Not a prayer. And if I must confess, Marion and I have been sneaking in wedding talk here and there, we couldn't help ourselves. However, you know me; I'll make a list and organize, and we could be married soon."

I felt the warmth of his lips touch mine, and then I watched him sit back down. "I love you." He said it with a dreamy sound to his voice.

Just as he professed his love to me for the tenth time that night, lightning flashed across the sky causing an image to flash before like the lightning. The internal image of me as a troublemaker in my life fizzled away and was replaced with an image of Mason and me as a married couple, and helping each other out, no matter what problem arises.

I know I have caused more trouble in my life, more times than I can count. I know I always had this needless pursuit to push away anyone who might actually love me for who I am. Here before me was a man who was telling me he loves me for who I am, I pushed him away like a test, and he passed with flying colors - all straight A's. His excitement for our future together was the best confirmation a woman could ever ask for.

The next loud clap of the thunder that came before the next flash of lightning brought me back to Mason, looking at me tenderly, holding my hand while we sat on the bench. Before me was a man whom I fell head over heels, literally, just from the sight of him. His first flirt, to me ending it with a kiss, sent me into a tailspin, and now, he has shown me he is just as committed to me as he is to his career, his family and their relationship, and mine as well. How could I not want this for myself? Could I be so stupid as to push him away again as to some test of his love? No. I am thirty now, and I left all that lesson learning shenanigans behind me; I hope!

The End

"You can live your whole life judging people or you can live it with an open heart and open mind. If someone is toxic or judgmental than leave them to their own accord, do not subject yourself to their behavior. Be the person you want to be. Find it in your heart to strive forward with what is best for you." CJ Hawk - May the wings of freedom lift you higher.

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