“Oh, holy Mary Tyler Moore,” he mutters before turning around and placing his arms on the doorframe so no one can get in. “You do NOT want to go in there.”
We all stand in the hallway giving each other equal looks of fear and horror at what could possibly be happening on the other side of Drew.
Is someone dead? Did the cat fights finally get serious and one of the girls is now missing an eye? What if it’s Veronica? Oh my God, my baby is going to have to go through life wearing an eye patch like a pirate! On National Pirate Day she’ll be expected to dress up and talk in a funny voice the whole day because she’s a pirate every day and everyone will just assume she’s really good at it. But what if she isn’t good at being a pirate? She’ll be hated by all for not knowing what “walk the plank” means. I don’t even know what the hell it means!
“Drew, what the fuck, man? What did they do?” Carter asks as he pushes me to the side so he can see over Drew’s arms.
“Oh my fuck,” Carter sighs. “You might as well drop your arms. They’re going to have to see it sooner or later. Claire, take a deep breath first.”
Drew finally moves out of the way and we can all see just what has happened in the play room.
All five girls are sitting in a circle in the middle of the room, and each one’s face is completely covered in black Sharpie marker. And when I say completely covered, I mean completely. Absolutely. Lips, nose, eyelids, ears…covered. We all slowly make our way into the room, our mouths drop open in shock. It’s not until we’re fully inside the room that we notice the extent of the damage. As I turn around in circles, I’m kind of amazed at the detail of the scenes drawn on the wall. In black Sharpie. They actually drew a castle with a princess in the tower and a moat. It’s a pretty good picture.
“Holy hell, is that a dragon? Dude, who did the dragon? That’s pretty good,” Drew asks.
“I did!” Charlotte pipes up. She immediately wipes the black smile off of her face when she sees the murderous look on Liz’s face.
“I just painted these walls,” Claire mumbles as she takes on a catatonic look and stares at the ceiling.
“Gavin! Have you been in here this entire time?” Carter shouts.
I didn’t even notice Gavin sitting sideways in a chair in the corner with his legs hanging over the arms, flipping through a book.
“Yep,” Gavin answers as he continues turning the pages without looking up.
“Um, and you didn’t think it was necessary to tell us the girls were painting their faces and the walls with a marker that doesn’t wash off?” Carter scolds.
Gavin finally looks away from his book and notices the girls in the middle of the room, all sitting silently and still clutching the permanent markers in their hands.
“Heh, heh. Nice job, cootie faces!”
“Shut up, you piece of crap!” Ava yells.
“AVA!” Liz yells.
“What? I’m not allowed to call him a piece of shit, am I?” she replies as she crosses her arms and pouts.
“She’s got a point. She’s not allowed to say ‘shit’,” Jim whispers to Liz.
“I just painted these walls,” Claire mutters again.
“This is the best game night ever!” Drew exclaims as he pulls out his cell phone and starts snapping pictures. “Girls, say, ‘Once you go black, you never go back!'”
I walk over and smack his arm, snatching the phone out of his hand. “Alright, girls, everybody up, clothes off and into the bathroom.”
Liz and I start herding the girls out of the room and across the hall.
“Gavin, go get some soap and water and start scrubbing these walls,” Carter says as he makes his way over to Claire and wraps her in his arms.
“Why do I have to clean the walls? I didn’t draw on them. This is HORSESHIT!”
“GAVIN ALLEN! I JUST PAINTED THESE WALLS! DID YOU HEAR ME? I…JUST…PAINTED…THESE…WALLS! IJUSTPAINTEDTHESEWALLS! IJUSTPAINTEDTHESEWALLS!” Claire shrieks.
“Is she losing her shit or is she trying to do another Mad Gab?” Drew asks me. “Because if it’s a Mad Gab, I’m going with ‘A just plain teddy swallows’.”
Chapter 14 - Racers, Take Your Mark