Carrie
It feels strange not having Mom with us when Dad drops me off at the dorm. I carry the last of my boxes up the stairs, and I stumble to a stop when I turn the corner. Because standing there with his back against the wall, one foot resting on the bricks behind him, is Nick.
I drop what’s in my hands and it clatters to the floor.
“Here, let me help you,” he says, and he starts to pick up my things and put them back in my box.
“What are you doing here, Nick?” I ask when I can finally catch my breath.
“I’m helping you pick up your stuff.” He looks up at me and grins.
“No, I mean here. What are you doing here? At school.”
“Oh, I’m going here, too,” he says. Then he grins.
“Shut up!” I say. My heart skips a beat. “Are you serious?” I launch myself at him and he stumbles back against the wall, but he catches me. He holds me tightly to him.
“I couldn’t live without you,” he says. He holds me even tighter.
I grin against his neck. “I can’t believe you’re here. How did you…? What did you…?”
“Ask questions later,” Dad says as he joins us. “Unpack now.” He high-fives Nick. He knew!
“You knew!” I cry.
“You and your mom aren’t the only ones who can have secrets,” he says. “Nick and I have bonded.”
I have no idea what that means.
“He likes me now,” Nick explains.
Dad glowers at him. “I wouldn’t go that far.”
Nick chuckles. But he helps Dad move my things in and they talk. We all go to dinner, and then Dad drops us off at my dorm. By some fluke of good luck I am living by myself, no roommate, so I invite Nick up.
When we get inside, I launch myself at him and wrap my arms around his neck. I kiss him. I kiss him like there will never be another tomorrow.
“How did you do all this?” I ask against his lips.
“I had some help from your mom.”
“Are you serious?”
“And your dad.”
I lay my ear over his heart, and listen to the beat of his heart. “He likes you, even if he won’t admit it.”
“There’s so much I need to tell you,” he rushes to say. “I rented my room to Jack, so between her and Malone, my bills all get paid. I just hope they can keep from killing one another.”
I’m so happy he’s here that I could just about burst. I want to find out so many things, like how he has managed to put all this together, and what happened between Amber and Seth after I left, and I’m really hoping someone finally kicked Dean-the-neighbor’s ass. But I can find all that out later. Right now, I just want to kiss him. And never stop.
Nick brushes my hair back from my face. “Carrie, I figured if I only had one last moment, only one, I wouldn’t want to waste it. I’d want to be with you. So here I am.” He shrugs.
“Well, I’m going to tell you how this year is going to go,” I say. I turn his face to me and look into his eyes. “We’re going to love each other like crazy. Then you’re going home with me for vacations, because Dad probably won’t have it any other way. Then in the summer, we can go to the beach house. And then, when we’re all done with school, we’re going to get great jobs and make some babies. And then we’ll take them to the beach house, where we’ll fly kites and walk the beach to look for shells. And if we have a daughter, I’ll take her to the lighthouse and lie with her under the shadow of it and talk.”
“That sounds like more than one year,” he says, but he’s nodding. “But I agree. I accept. I say yes. I want what you want. And I want to get you naked.”
I stop breathing. “Yes.”
“I need to run to my dorm and get some…things.” His face turns red.
“I’ll go with you.”
He grins and takes my hand. We open the door and look out on the railing. There’s a big yellow swallowtail fluttering its wings. I stare at it. “Look at that, Carrie,” he says.
“I see it.” I see her in all things. Everywhere. All the time. In the wind that blows, in the music on the radio, in the drops of rain that spatter on my windshield.
Because it’s not only one moment that defines a life. There are lots of moments, and I revel in them all.
Dear Readers,
If you’ll indulge me for one moment, I have a couple of thoughts I’d like to leave you with. Sometimes I write books because I want to entertain, and then other times I write them because they get in my head and won’t leave me alone until I get them on paper.. This one is both.
Depression is real, and it often goes undiagnosed. If you wake up and can’t find one thing to look forward to, like my character Patty did, ask for help, because it does exist. There is light at the end of that dark tunnel. You’ll see.
Depression is not a deficit of character. There are many stigmas attached to it, and people suffering from depression often feel weak asking for help. Because really – you have your life in order and people to support you and everything should be fabulous, right? But it’s not. And you just don’t know why.
Ask for help.
Because silence will change nothing.
I am grateful to be able to tell stories. So, thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the overlapping stories in Only One. I certainly enjoyed writing it.
With much gratitude,
Only One (Reed Brothers)
Tammy Falkner's books
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