“Yeah, love. I can see myself falling in love with you and as much as I’m trying not to, it’s not working.” He says quietly. He sits down next to me and leans back into the couch. “I don’t know what else to say. I shouldn’t have to sell myself to you. You either like me or you don’t. Thing is, you can’t lie, I know you feel something, you just have to let yourself believe I’m good enough to be a part of your life.”
His phone rings again. I throw my hands up in the air. “Seriously, answer your damn phone.” He rolls his eyes and picks it up.
“Hello… yeah I remember… how’d you get my number?” Harrison has a confused look on his face. He bites his lip as he listens to his caller. “Okay… please don’t call me again.” He hangs up and puts his phone on his pocket.
“Who was that?” I ask even though it’s none of my business.
He shrugs.
“See this is one of the reasons. I know it was a woman, I could hear her whiney voice. Has she been the one calling you for the last hour?”
“It doesn’t matter who it was. What matters is that you don’t want to be with me, yet you’re still sitting in this room when you should be doing your job and getting things set up for tonight. I was in here because I can’t sleep on the bus. The room is yours now.”
I’m taken by his harsh tone, but this is what I’ve asked for. My lips form a thin line as I fight the urge to say something stupid. I nod and stand up. I look at Harrison, but he’s looking at his phone, ignoring me.
The door swings open and Liam barges in with the biggest pissed off look I’ve ever seen. Jimmy is following behind him. I look from Liam to Harrison, who doesn’t acknowledge the guys being in here.
“What have you done?” Liam asks in an incredulous tone.
“What are you talking about?”
“This.” Liam holds up a piece of paper and shakes it.
I walk over and pull it out of his hands. It’s the contract for the venue. As I read it my stomach drops.
“I… I… don’t –“
“You’re right, you don’t. This is bullshit, Katelyn, aren’t you paying attention?”
“I am,” I say with a shaky voice.
“What is it?” Harrison asks.
“Seems Katelyn has doubled booked us for the rest of the tour. We are supposed to be in Colorado and Seattle tomorrow night.”
“How is that possible?” Harrison stands and walks over to take the paper from Liam. He reads it over, looking at me for answers that I can’t give. I never set any dates in Colorado so I’m not sure how they ended up with a contract.
“Says we lose ten grand if we don’t show.”
“Yep sure does.”
My heart drops and dread takes over my body. An error somehow on my part just cost the guys ten grand.
Harrison looks from Liam to me, and I know this time he’s not coming to my defense. I’ve ruined any chance of having him in my corner when I told him that I couldn’t be with him. He hands me the contract and leaves the room, followed by Jimmy and lastly, Liam. I jump when the door slams shut and don’t even bother stopping the tears when they flow.
I lie on my bed, with my hands behind my head, replaying the last few days over and over in my head. Now that the tour is over, albeit cut short, reality is jumping up and down, reminding me that school is about to start, that I have to be a responsible parent. My circle of friends, people I’ve depended on for so long, are living their lives in L.A. while Quinn and I live the high life in Beaumont. I shouldn’t have to remind myself that this is what I wanted. I just thought things would be different.
Hell, I don’t know what I thought, but definitely not this. I’m not gonna lie, I want her in my bed at night. I want to wake up and find her cooking breakfast for our kids. I want to come home at night and have everyone gathering around the table for dinner. But that’s not going to happen. She’s made herself very clear and I can’t continue putting myself out there for the rejection. A man can only take so much in his lifetime.
I look at the clock and sigh heavily. This year I’m taking Quinn to buy his school supplies. Usually my mom, or Meghan, his nanny, has done it and now it’s my turn. It’s time for me to grow up, I guess. I get up, get dressed and slip into my boots, looking down at my attire. I know Katelyn snubs her nose at the way I look. I’ve seen her do it and that’s fine. I’m not going to change for her or anyone. I like my t-shirts, khaki shorts, beanie and either my boots or Vans. Hell, I’ve been known to wear Chucks before. Aren’t those supposed to be considered high-class-guy-fashion or something?
I knock on Quinn’s door and open it, sticking my head inside. He’s sitting in his beanbag chair playing in his Xbox.
“Wanna go school shopping?”
“Sure,” he says as he powers down his console. It’s a proud dad moment when he doesn’t argue or roll his eyes. I know those days are coming and honestly, I don’t know what I’ll do the first time he smarts off to me. He walks ahead, his clothes matching mine, everything except for the hat. He likes to keep his hair styled, something I never did at his age.