LaWanda, wanting to belly over in laughter, waved her finger in the air instead. “Y’all women gotta stop being so picky! God can be calling Deacon Paul to you and you worried about something as petty as his booger picking habit instead.”
I liked LaWanda. She was beautiful with her almond complexion and bouncy natural afro that flopped at least nine inches out. She was tall and slim and always wore over sized clothing. Her style resembled hippy. LaWanda always seemed to be leveled and focused. She initiated this particular group. In one of our previous meetings, she mentioned her degree in political science and that she’d been pursing a graduate degree in Public Administration. I could see her gathering and leading people to the promise land with her passion. I kind of envied her confidence and initiative. She’d been consistently warm and friendly. I’d heard from Yolanda’s rants one week that she was seeing the bass player from the church.
“No! I’m not picky just because I’m not desperate enough to take on just any man that flicks his eye at me! Shoot. It’s hard being single, but I got me a mechanical device to pass the time,” Karmen blurted out with the roll of the eyes while she rested her elbows on the marble countertop of the island that we’d all retreated to. The kitchen was divided with half silence and half high-fiving her. I was a neutral party and watched.
“Now, Karm, you know any sex outside of marriage is a sin, right?” LaWanda admonished. I guess she felt the need to be responsible since she was the group leader.
Holy crap! Time to get everybody out of here!
“That ain’t sex. It’s call self-preservation until God sends my Boaz!” Trina declared. There was another round of laughter in the room and I went to one of the cabinets to grab small plastic bags for them to carry their containers in.
“No. Penetration or stimulation period should only happen in marriage, Karmen. You sat at the First Lady’s conference this spring when she spoke about the conduct of the Christian woman. She said a huge part of your faith is abstaining until God sends you a man. You know this,” LaWanda calmly scolded.
“Well, I got faith and while I’m fighting it, Im’ma keep my rabbit charged and ready!” Rhonda huffed surly. Again, an uproar of opinions had erupted.
“There are many of us who are fully abstaining. Abstinence is extremely difficult, but we can overcome anything through faith.” LaWanda fought. I dropped the salad serving bowl in the sink trying to rinse it for the dishwasher. It was loud and somehow quieted the room.
“Rayna, you’re always quiet during these talks. I know you’re a medical professional and I can see by this expansive pad you got here that you’re doing well. I also know you’re not married. What can you share with these women who are clearly divided on how a single woman of God should keep herself busy until she finds a man? You seem to have your head on straight and Pastor Edmondson speaks highly of you. Share.” LaWanda’s big brown eyes implored.
In slow motion all heads flung in my direction awaiting my response. My heart fell into my stomach and I felt an anxiety attack coming on. I knew this wasn’t a good idea! I swear, I will never host a Bible study again. I felt the air invading my mouth telling me it was open and wide.
“Errrrr…errrrr…I really don’t know.” Rayna, surely you can come better than that! “Ummmm…everyone’s walk is different. I’m no better than anyone in this room. We all have needs and desires, but we’re all on individual and singular journeys. Who am I to say?” I smiled sheepishly hoping no one could detect my embarrassment and riddle in my answer.
“Well, are you dating?” Lisa demanded with the twirling of the head and crossed arms.
Crap! Crap! Crap! No, not me…get the spotlight off of me!