His eyes shot up at my brashness. He knew I’d sworn off profanity weeks ago. But I was so angry and confused that I’d lost self-control. It was as though all those deprecating feelings I’d experienced when I learned of his betrayal had suddenly resurfaced.
He cocked his head to the side, “Yet? When and why would that be a possibility?” he murmured in disbelief.
“Don’t sit here and undermine my intelligence, Azmir! At least acknowledge my dignity. I saw the damn texts from her. You kissed her!” My tone was stridulous.
I barked to the point of straining my vocal chords, I had hit a brick wall. My emotions were on high and that was clearly evident to me at this point. Azmir’s eyes widened again in surprise.
“How did you read my text mess—” his voice dropped when the password revelation hit him.
Azmir backed into the wall, there in his foyer, and let his knees give way as he dropped to the floor. He rubbed his face and exhaled in exasperation.
Yeah, even the powerful and fearless mogul is brought to his knees when confronted with the truth!
My stomach jumped to my throat, not letting my words escape, but I fought to push them out. “You betrayed me. I asked you in there…” I pointed in the direction of the master suite. “…the night I moved in, not to hurt me and you did. You kissed and did God knows what to her. You were in clear violation!” My words were mumbled from my fierce, yet unsuccessful efforts to suppress my tears. I panted, trying to catch my breath among the pouring tears.
He rose to his feet. “I did not fuck Da—”
I interrupted, “And then you had the nerve to dick slap Brian Thompson, who I have never dreamed of touching. You are such a hypocrite and I can’t believe I told you I loved you! I can’t believe I trusted you with my…heart!” Once again my words were barely audible.
“You haven’t trusted me with shit!” Azmir shouted with an unknown emotion glaring in his eyes. Eyes that suddenly didn’t peer into me with adoration or desire. I saw frustration. Exasperation. Near brokenness. “You never lower your guards long enough to do it! I didn’t know what you felt for me until two days ago when you said you loved me!” Azmir screamed so loud that I jumped in my shoes.
His words ripped the air from my lungs. His fury gouged my heart. How could he act as though he had no clue of my feelings for him? We’ve been together, going full steam ahead ever since Atlantic City—even when we weren’t physically together. I felt shattered, completely broken.
“So, you kiss her?” He won’t put this on me.
With his head buried in his hands, he muttered, “It was fucked up and unplanned, but yes. I did.” I gasped so deep, I felt my lungs were going to explode. Learning about it was one thing, but hearing him admit it was a totally different type of discovery. There was an expectant pause before he continued. “She was clear about her desire to be with me. She was consistent, and even though I felt like shit once I realized what was happening, I knew it was because she showed interest.” His voice grew silent with each word and I knew they were indicative of his true feelings.
There was silence for a while.
“I don’t want her.”
“But she wants you,” I quickly retorted, needing him to know how I read the situation. It was my reality, my doom. “…and she will continue to be clear and forceful in her pursuits and when she finally captures your heart, because I can’t give you the type of emotions you say you need, where will that leave us?”
“I DON’T WANT HER!” he roared.
Why is he repeating himself?
Then it hit me!
“You know, don’t you?” I felt my eyes squint and my mouth drop. “My God, you know!” I couldn’t believe it.
He looked at me with perplexed eyes. It was almost intimidating. “I. Know. What?”