It's not that I don't want more for myself. I know that I tend to "play it safe" when it comes to most things, including ambition. But I also figure I started out with enough drama and heartache to last a lifetime and "safe" might be boring, but it's also something that is coveted by someone who never had any. And so for now, I'm content.
After hopping off the bus downtown, I walk quickly to the employee entrance of the large hotel and clock in just in time. I stock a housecleaning cart and make my way to the top of the hotel, beginning on the floor where the penthouse is located. I knock quietly and when there's no response, I open the door with my pass key. I wheel the cart in and take in the room. It seems vacated if not slightly trashed, and so I begin stripping the bed. I turn up my iPod and sing along to Rhianna. I smile and shake my ass as I put a fresh sheet on the king sized bed. This is one thing I do love about this job. I can get lost in my own head, the cleaning a monotonous background activity. I pull the fresh duvet up on the bed and begin turning it down when I catch movement out of the corner of my eye and whirl around, jumping slightly and letting out a choked sound of surprise. There is a man standing behind me, leaning casually in the doorway of the bedroom, with a smirk on his face. I take my earbuds out and blink rapidly, embarrassed, "I'm so sorry," I say, "I didn't think anyone was here. If you need me to return later, I'll be happy to do that."
I start moving my cart towards the doorway. He advances rapidly, startling me, and grabbing on to the handle of my cart. "Really," he says, "It's fine. We were just leaving. I was just enjoying the show." He grins and his eyes lazily run up my body, from my feet to my breasts, and I fidget uncomfortably. I smile awkwardly when his eyes meet mine and that's when a woman walks in to the room. She is beautiful, her blond hair perfectly coiffed, her makeup flawless, and I feel immediately self conscious. I nod my head in her direction and begin moving towards the door. "I'll come back," I murmur, but both of them are moving towards the door as well and as they do, the woman says, "Really, we're just leaving, stay and finish up." She offers me a look of disdain as she shrugs on her jacket, and says, "And make sure you empty the trash, the last girl who was in here forgot to do that." The man smiles towards her and pats her on the ass as she's scooting out the door and she lets out a giggle.
I stand motionless for a minute after the door has shut behind them, trying to recoup the careless attitude I had before they interrupted me but the mood has suddenly shifted and I feel melancholy in a way I don't really want to think about.
I finish up my shift and as I clock out, my friend Nicole rushes up behind me and swipes her time card.
"Damn slobs on the twelfth floor," she rants. "I swear, you'd think some of the people who stay here were raised in a barn. It took me two hours to clean three rooms on that floor. Disgusting. Don't even ask. Now I'm late to pick up Kaylee. Walk with me to the bus stop? My car is in the shop." She grabs for her coat as she's talking.
I grin at her and shrug on my own coat as we walk towards the door. "Maybe we could make up a 'for the consideration of your housecleaning crew' list to hand out at check in?" I offer sarcastically.
"Yes! Number one, please for the love of God, wrap your used condoms in toilet paper and deposit them in the trash. It is beyond my job description to scrape your dried… stuff off of the carpet after you toss the thing under the bed."
I fake a vomiting noise but I'm laughing as we hurry towards the bus stop. "Okay," I continue, "Number two, please don't clip your toenails in bed. I prefer not to get a clippings shower when I shake out your comforter and then have to go around on my hands and knees attempting to collect them all off the floor."
"Oh God! Truly? Animals!" But she's laughing too.
Her bus is just pulling up to her stop so I give her a quick hug goodbye saying, "See you Wednesday night!" as I start walking across the street to my stop going in the other direction.
Nicole never ceases to make me smile with her carefree attitude and funny sense of humor. She's married to a really great guy named Mike and has a three year old daughter, Kaylee. Mike is an electrician and makes good money but Nicole works housekeeping a couple days a week to bring in a little extra and she'd tell you, to enhance her shoe budget. She's got a thing for shoes, the higher the better. I don't know how she walks in some of those things.
Nicole and I hit it off quickly when I met her at work three years ago. She and Mike have me over for dinner at least once a week and I love spending time with them and Kaylee, soaking in the joy and comfort that is a loving family, doing nothing more special than having a meal together and sharing their evening. What they don't fully get is that, to me, a loving family dinner isn't just special, it's everything. Everything I never had.
Nicole and Mike know that I grew up in foster care but not too much beyond that. They're kind, hardworking people who live in a cute little two bedroom house in a decent neighborhood and I don't want to bring stories of drug abuse, pimps, and molestation into their world. Not that they're naive about the fact that all of that stuff goes on, but in a lot of ways, they're my bubble, my safe place away from that world and I want to keep it that way.
I pull out my novel and start reading as the bus begins its journey across town to my apartment. I'm so engrossed I almost miss my stop, jumping up just in time to make it through the closing door. I walk the five blocks to my apartment and let myself in through the front door, shaking my head at the broken, again, lock. Okay, so security isn't exactly high but it's decently clean and it has a sunny balcony off the back where I can grow a few fruit trees in containers and several pots of flowers. Sometimes I sit out there in the evenings with a good book, feeling content. And it's enough.