My eyes fill with tears because I know he's right. I've learned over the two years that I've known Leo that his dad is evil personified. Leo's big mistake was that his mom cheated on his dad and got pregnant with him. And because of Leo's grievous sin, being CREATED, his dad made it his mission in life to make Leo suffer.
Leo's second mistake was that he loved his younger brother, Seth, diagnosed with a severe form of autism and developmentally delayed. Because Leo's dad knew that Leo loved Seth, he used him to hurt Leo. He threw beer cans at Seth's head, he let him wallow in his own waste all day while Leo was at school, unable to take care of him, and he was all around cruel to Seth as a way to make a point to Leo. The sickest part of it was that Seth was his own flesh and blood, but all he saw him as was a pawn to use against the personification of his rage and humiliation.
"They put Seth in a state run home." And I hear the tears in his voice so I move closer and meld my body to his, and take his hand in mine. "That place will kill him."
The reason Leo is in foster care is because his dad beat the crap out of him after Leo tried to smother him in his sleep when he threatened to send Seth away. He had admitted to me that he knew he wouldn't have gone through with it, but he was so filled with fear and rage about him sending Seth away that he wanted to divert his dad's wrath back onto himself. I've told Leo a thousand times how brave he is, but he doesn't believe me.
He sighs. "I don't even care what happens to me, I just don't want Seth to pay the price for it and now he is because my mom signed the papers to have Seth put away, even though I know it was that douchebag's idea so he could move home. And I'm sure sticking it to me was a happy side benefit."
I don't say it, but the truth of the matter is, with Leo gone, caring for Seth is probably too much work for them. Leo had done everything for that little boy, from changing his diapers to playing with him, bathing him and getting him to bed every night, before he was sent to foster care.
"At court today, that son of a bitch passed me in the hall and whispered, 'Seth's GONE, boy. Hope he makes it.' Then he laughed his ass off as he walked away. Laughed, Evie! And my mom's no better. She just drags after him like he has her hypnotized with his charming personality." Tears are running down his cheeks now and I am squeezing his hand like it's my lifeline.
"You know the only reason they even showed up at court today was to whine to the judge about what a sorry hand they were dealt in life to have a good for nothing kid like me for one, and a retard for the other. Maybe they thought the judge would feel so sorry for them, he'd spring for a tropical vacation or something." He laughs a hollow laugh.
"The thing is, Evie, I tried so hard to protect Seth but in truth, I'm such a fuck up, I couldn't even manage that. The bastard is right about me. I ruin everything. I do something to ruin all the people who love me. Eventually, I fuck up everything because that's who I am."
And that's when I'd had enough. "Stop," I say gently, but then firmer, "Stop! You're wrong, Leo. And I will not let that poor excuse for a human being make you think of yourself that way. You're brave and strong and noble. You're my Leo."
Leo is quiet now, breathing evenly, but his body is still tense. "Tell me a story, Evie," he says finally.
I take a deep breath and impossibly, move even closer to him. It's a hot summer night and I am already clammy from our closeness but I don't move away.
We are both silent for several minutes but eventually, I roll onto my back and say, "There was once a very beautiful woman, and although she had the face of an angel, she was hollow on the inside. Right in the place where her heart should have been located, there was just a big, gaping hole. Because of this defect, an ogre was able to court her and she married him; he was as ugly on the inside as he was on the outside."
"One day the woman needed to get away from the ogre because his ugly personality and his ugly face became too much for her to bear, and as it turned out, even hollow people can only take so much ugliness."
"She walked and walked until she came upon a quiet meadow and she lay down in the middle of that meadow, soaking in the stillness of the night. What she didn't know was that there was a great beast lurking nearby; A massive lion, with a mane of gold and the thunderous roar of a hundred lions."
"As the beautiful but hollow woman lay in the field, this beast approached her quietly and when she opened her eyes and spied him, she was spellbound because the sight of him was like nothing she had ever seen. He held the woman down with one massive paw, although, strangely, she wasn't scared, only curious. When dawn broke, the beauty awoke and thought that the night before had been only a dream. But the woman was now carrying a child, a son. And this beautiful boy would have the gifts of both his parents, the beauty of his mother and the heart of his father, the heart of a lion."
We're both quiet for several long moments.
Then Leo rolls towards me and he is looking at me with fire in his eyes. "I love you, Evie," he whispers.
"I love you, too, my Leo," I whisper back.
CHAPTER 12
Landon gives me a ride home. He asks me repeatedly if I want to go out for late night drinks but I really just want to crawl into my bed and shut out the world.
I never did see Jake again after the caviar incident but it's for the best as far as I’m concerned. Watching him with Gwen would just have been even more painful and humiliating.
As Landon drops me off, he gives me a hug and tells me to call him tomorrow. "I have layers of dust all over my apartment and loads of laundry to do but if you need any company, I will drop all that excitement in a heartbeat." He smiles and I smile back. "Love you girl," he says quietly.
"Love you, Lan," I say as I get out.
I unlock the front building door and of course my mind goes straight to Jake. Thinking about what him and Gwen are doing right about now just makes me cringe.
I let myself in to my apartment and take a quick shower. Then I brush my teeth, pull on an old t-shirt and a pair of shorts and climb into bed.