Illusions of Love

chapter 27



The Coconut Palm Bar was full of its usual mix of curious tourists and bohemian regulars, the latter of which always arrived just as the sun was setting, when the atmosphere was more mellow and the drinks were flowing. Although, that party atmosphere that always surrounded the bar in the daytime and early evening still hung heavy in the air with loud, rocking music and people dancing amongst the cabanas that lined the poolside and the tables closer to the half-moon shaped bar that was draped in fairy lights and lanterns, giving the place an almost Caribbean feel.

India sat back against the super-sized zebra-print cushions that were scattered over the white corner-sofa in the private cabana that she, Kenny and Bobby had commandeered for the evening, although Bobby had spent less time in the cabana and more time outside by the pool. Miguel was working bar for the night, showing off his cocktail-making skills to an enthralled crowd, but nobody was more enthralled than Bobby, who was just loving having his partner back in Vegas for a few days.

The more private cabana’s – like the one they were using – were staggered over various levels of the pool area around the Coconut Palm Bar, and were more like tiny hotel rooms as opposed to the pool-side cabanas which were basically just a huge double four-poster bed covered by a cascading canopy of draped white muslin.

The private cabanas were slightly sturdier with a thatched roof, sofas, TV and Mp3 player and fairy lights strewn all around the place. There was even the option of a private waiter on hand to serve drinks, if requested. Kenny and India didn’t need that service though. Bobby was keeping them well supplied with Miguel’s finest cocktails.

It was turning out to be one of the best nights India had experienced since arriving in Vegas, just kicking back and hanging out. Kenny had even brought his guitar, although it was difficult to drown out the music coming from the main bar area so Kenny just played along, both of them singing out loud to classic rock songs from the likes of The Eagles, Pink Floyd and The Who. India really couldn’t remember a more relaxed and chilled out evening, just her and the man she would always call her best friend.

‘I was thinking, why don’t we get out of here, once this movie’s wrapped? Go on vacation, somewhere away from all of this. Just me and you,’ Kenny smiled, quietly strumming away on his guitar as the strains of Free’s Fire and Water drifted up from the bar. ‘Anywhere in particular you feel like going?’

India stretched out on the sofa, closing her eyes as she inhaled and breathed out deep, letting the past few days and all the crap it had brought to her door just wash over her.

‘I don’t know, Kenny. I hadn’t even thought about what I’ll do when this movie’s finished. Apart from go back to L.A. and spend some time with the kids.’

‘We could take them with us. Anywhere you want to go, kiddo, just say the word.’

She leant over and kissed him gently. ‘You are so bloody lovely, do you know that?’

‘Yeah, well, don’t tell everyone,’ Kenny smiled, winking at her. ‘I’ve still got an image to keep up… Is that your cell phone or mine?’

India reached over and grabbed her phone from the table beside her, checking the screen. ‘It’s mine. Another message from Dominic.’

Kenny laid his guitar down against the sofa, sitting back and grabbing his bottle of beer from the floor, taking a long swig. ‘You not gonna check it?’

India sat back too, scrolling down the message Dominic had sent her. A short, simple message – Talk to me. Please.

Pushing a hand through her hair she sighed heavily, showing Kenny the screen.

‘Talk to him,’ Kenny said, taking another drink. ‘Because he’s obviously not going to give up until you do.’

‘Who’s not going to give up?’ Bobby asked, arriving back at the cabana with more drinks, looking resplendent in khaki shorts and a brightly coloured T-shirt, a straw hat with a cocktail umbrella sticking out of it now covering his dark hair, a pair of maracas sticking out of his back pocket.

India looked at her fabulous P.A. She loved him to death because, no matter what situation she was in, he could always make her smile. Somehow. He never judged her, he never interfered, yet he always helped. That was what Bobby did. And he did it so well.

‘Dominic,’ India replied, pulling the cocktail umbrella out of his hat and sticking it in her hair.

‘Have you seen him tonight?’ Bobby asked, handing her something yellow and green which she took without question. Miguel had a habit of making drinks that sometimes looked slightly alarming in colour, but they always tasted great.

‘No. I haven’t seen him. Why? Is he hanging around outside or something?’

Bobby nodded. ‘I’m surprised he hasn’t come looking for you up here, actually.’

India ignored the tiny flip her stomach turned, hugging her knees to her chest. ‘These are private cabanas, Bobby. He probably wouldn’t get past Carlos, anyway. Regardless of who he is.’

‘Carlos? Oh, you mean Rocky out there?’ Bobby tutted, pursing his lips and folding his arms, indicating outside to where India’s personal security guard was lurking somewhere discreetly out of sight.

‘Bobby! Carlos is lovely! And he’s only looking out for me right now, isn’t he?’ India smiled, all too aware that Bobby was slightly unnerved by the appearance of the tighter security surrounding her at the minute. Security she wasn’t all that keen on having herself. But, despite Carlos being a very large built Hispanic man with an intense stare, he was harmless, really. To those who played by the rules.

Bobby sniffed, sitting down and crossing his legs, his arms still folded. ‘Well, I don’t think he likes me, Angel.’

India couldn’t help laughing. ‘What makes you say that?’

‘Have you seen the way he looks at me?’

She wrapped her arms around his neck from behind, giving him a big kiss on the cheek. ‘You’re being silly. Try speaking to him now and again; you’ll see how lovely he is. Anyway…’ She trailed off, sitting back against the cushions again, looking at Kenny. Did she really want to talk about Dominic? Did she really want to spoil this perfect night?

‘He’s hanging around down by the bar,’ Bobby said, answering the question she’d really wanted to ask. ‘He wanted to know if you were here.’

Kenny just raised his eyebrows, shrugging. He wasn’t going to tell her that he really didn’t want her to talk to Dominic tonight. Hell, he didn’t want her to talk to Dominic at all if he could help it.

‘Did you tell him anything?’ India asked, turning away from Kenny. She’d done it now, hadn’t she? She was going to see Dominic tonight, whether she really wanted to or not. She’d left herself with no choice.

‘Of course not, Princess!’ He looked at her, biting down on his bottom lip. ‘Should I have done?’

She curled her legs up underneath her, shaking her head. ‘No. I think he already knows I’m here anyway, otherwise why send me that text?’

Bobby threw a questioning look in Kenny’s direction. ‘He’s still trying to talk to her,’ Kenny said, draining the last of his beer from the bottle, immediately picking up the fresh one Bobby had brought him. He suddenly needed a bigger kick of alcohol.

Bobby turned his attention to India, his eyes meeting hers and the look he gave her made tears well up out of nowhere, because Bobby could read her so well. He knew, just by looking at her, that she was going to give in to the man that was Michael’s son. She was going to give in because she needed to do that for the sake of her own sanity. Pretending she didn’t care was just too exhausting. Another bad decision on her part? Maybe. But she was going to make it anyway.

‘I’ll go get him,’ Bobby sighed, pulling himself up from the floor and kissing her forehead, squeezing her hand. ‘Honestly, Angel, are you ever going to start doing anything that doesn’t involve a whole heap of complications?’

Kenny looked at her, forcing a smile that he didn’t feel much like giving, but maybe they’d always been heading in this direction, despite everything that had gone on before. Even now, albeit more indirectly than Kenny could have predicted, Michael Walsh still had a hold over India. Just not in a way that even he could have envisaged.

‘You gonna be okay?’ Kenny asked, getting up and grabbing his guitar, slinging it over his shoulder.

India smiled back, hugging her knees to her chest. ‘Yeah. I’m gonna be just fine.’

He sat back down, putting a hand to her face, gently stroking her cheek with his thumb, kissing her quickly on the mouth. ‘Give me a call, okay? If you need me.’ He stood back up before India could say anything. ‘Hey, Bobby! Wait up! I’ll save you from the clutches of Carlos…’

India sat back against the cushions, grabbing one from behind her head and hugging it tight, a feeling of excitement mixed with nerves – still tinged with a touch of anger – causing her stomach to somersault continuously now she knew Dominic was on his way. This would be the first time she’d really been alone with him since it had all happened – that surreal night when she’d found out he was Michael’s son. The first time she’d really talked to him – properly talked to him – outside of the movie set. And what it was she actually said to him she had yet to work out, because she still didn’t know what it was she was really feeling.

‘Hey, beautiful.’

She opened her eyes and looked up. There he stood, leaning back against the wooden post of the cabana frame, his arms folded, his face serious. And she kind of missed the movie star smile he usually greeted her with, but maybe he was gauging her reaction before he started with all of that again. She couldn’t blame him.

‘Hey,’ she said, sitting up and crossing her legs up underneath her.

He sat down beside her, leaning forward, his hands clasped between his open knees as he stared straight ahead of him. ‘Alone at last, huh?’ He looked at her, a glimmer of that movie star smile beginning to appear but she didn’t smile back, not yet. She didn’t want him to think she was giving in that easy, because she wasn’t going to.

‘Maybe we do need to talk,’ she said, fiddling with the leather cuff bracelet she was wearing, her eyes finally meeting his and staying there. Those incredible, beautiful eyes of his. Eyes just like his father. Her ex-husband. The man she could never forget.

‘I don’t want to beat about the bush, India. I don’t want to waste time with conversations that are only going to take us round in circles; I just want you to know that I love you, okay? And I know that may be hard for you to believe, coming from me, but I do. I love you. Maybe it wasn’t my intention for that to happen when I started that ridiculous game I should never have played, but it did happen. And I had no control over that, because you give nobody a choice, baby. You give no man any f*cking choice and I fell hard, honey. So f*cking hard, you have no idea…’

‘So why didn’t you just tell me, Dominic? When you started to feel that way, why didn’t you just tell me everything?’

‘Would you have understood any more than you do now?’

A sudden breeze swept the curtains pulled around the cabana frame aside to reveal the lights from the pool-bar a level below them, palm trees swaying gently and what seemed like millions of tiny stars lighting up the black, cloudless night sky.

‘I don’t know,’ she whispered, looking at Dominic who was now staring at the floor. ‘I just know that you should have told me. Before Michael had a chance to do what he did because you let him win, and that’s something you should never do with a man like Michael Walsh.’

Dominic looked back up at her. ‘You loved him once, though. Didn’t you?’ I mean, you two, you were one of the strongest couples in Hollywood. What… what happened to change that?’

India turned away from him, focusing on the fairy lights strewn from the roof above them, each tiny twinkling white light becoming blurred through more tears that were threatening to fall thanks to the re-emergence of a subject she really didn’t want to talk about. Least of all with Dominic.

‘It’s over, Dominic. All of that, it’s over.’

‘Your relationship with Michael…’

‘I thought you’d come here to talk about us.’

His eyes met hers again and he stared at her, determined to get through to this woman tonight, even if it took until sunrise to do so. ‘So, there still is an ‘us’, then?’

She wanted to look away again but she couldn’t. She couldn’t turn away, it was almost as if there was something in those blue, blue eyes that hypnotised her into staying right she where was. A feeling she’d felt so often with his father. And that’s what scared her.

‘That’s what we’re here to find out,’ she said quietly, making a conscious effort to stop playing with the hem of her dress because she was all too aware it made her look nervous. And she could handle this. She’d handled far worse.

He continued to look at her, holding her gaze. ‘I’ve been an idiot. A total jerk, I can’t deny that. What I did it was… it was wrong. It was stupid, thoughtless, but I... Jesus, I don’t know. I guess finding out that Michael Walsh is your long lost father kind of messes with your head.’

She couldn’t help but smile slightly at that because, in her eyes, anything to do with Michael Walsh messed with your head.

‘When did you find out?’ she asked, turning her body so she faced him head on, tucking her legs up underneath her. ‘About Michael being your dad?’

‘My mom told me, just before she died... just a few months ago,’ Dominic replied, turning away briefly, staring down at his still-clasped-together hands. ‘I guess she finally felt the time was right.’

India noted a slight hint of flippancy in his voice, but that was purely understandable, given the f*cked-up circumstances they were dealing with. ‘Do you resent her at all? For keeping it from you for all those years?’

‘Did you resent your mom for not telling you about Reece?’

India flinched slightly as the memory of finding out about Reece being her father filled her head. And, yeah. Yeah, she did resent her mum for keeping Reece from her for all those years. But the circumstances were different. And her mum had only revealed who India’s real father was to benefit her; nothing to do with feeling guilty about keeping the truth from India for a good part of her life.

‘We’re not talking about me, Dominic.’

Dominic shook his head, his eyes meeting hers again. ‘No. No, I don’t resent her, India. How could I? I had the best life… she was a great mom, and Alan, he was a fantastic father. He was the best, and he was my real dad, y’know? In every sense of the word. Because he did all that important stuff. He gave me a childhood I’ll never forget. He made sacrifices for me and my mom, he gave us everything he had and I loved him. So much. He was a good man, a great father. And my mom – she was amazing. She did everything she could for me, I know that now, and if she thought it best I didn’t know about Michael until now, well, I respect her for making that decision.’ He sighed, sitting back and closing his eyes for just the briefest of seconds. ‘I just wish I’d f*cking handled it better.’

‘Like a grown-up, you mean?’ India smiled, and he looked at her, smiling back. Not quite the movie star smile, but getting there.

‘I don’t blame you for reacting the way you did.’

‘You hurt me, Dominic. The fact you even considered using me as some kind of pawn in a game…’

He sat up, reaching out to take her hand but she pulled away slightly. She wasn’t quite ready for that, not yet.

‘I’m sorry, India. Really, baby, I am so, so sorry.’

She sighed, throwing her head back, staring up at those twinkling fairy lights again, lights that gave the small cabana a warm, almost ethereal glow about it.

‘Can we stop saying sorry, okay?’ She looked at him, tired of the talking now. ‘Everyone’s sorry, I get that. It’s time to move on.’

‘And how do we do that?’ Dominic asked, desperate to touch her, to know that she wanted him as much as he wanted her because this whole situation was killing him.

‘Can I trust you, Dominic? Because I need to know I can trust you. Whether you like it or not you’re a Walsh, and that name isn’t one I find myself trusting too much anymore, so I need you to be different. I really need you to be different.’

He looked right into her eyes, staring so deep he swore he felt his heart flip right over in his chest. A feeling that was still quite alien to Dominic. ‘You can trust me. I promise you that, baby. I promise you that with every inch of my heart. I will never let you down again, you have to believe me. I will never do that again.’

This time she smiled a smile that sent a wave of relief coursing through Dominic’s entire body. ‘Then we start over,’ she said.

‘Start over?’

She finally made a move, leaning over towards him, touching his mouth quickly in the briefest of kisses but it was enough to make her skin tingle, a sharp shiver running right up her spine. It was enough to tell her that there was a chance she could fall in love with this man, a chance that she could do that in a heartbeat, and she couldn’t deny it any longer. No matter how dangerous or risky that may turn out to be. She’d already let him in. It was too late. She’d tried walking away and it hadn’t worked, so it was too late. She may not forget what he’d done in a hurry – he’d said she could trust him but he still had to prove that – but she needed to know where this journey was going to take them now, because being without him had made her more miserable than she’d cared to admit.

‘Let’s try again, Dominic MacDonald. Movie Star.’

And there it was, that smile she’d been longing to see, his face lighting up in an instant, making him ten times more handsome than he already was. Heartbreakingly handsome.

He tentatively reached out to her and this time she didn’t pull away as he touched her face with his fingertips, moving closer so his mouth rested on hers, closing his eyes as he kissed her long and deep. A kiss that made him feel as though he’d finally come home, somewhere safe and warm, somewhere he’d ached to be for days now because every second without her had felt like that clichéd eternity he’d heard people talk about so many times before and in his own cynical way had never believed. Until he’d almost lost this woman here with him now. Now he knew how long, drawn out and painful those seconds could be.

‘It won’t be easy, you realise that, don’t you?’ India said, her mouth still close to his as she spoke. ‘This relationship, it’s going to be played out in the spotlight, we can’t avoid that. Not now.’

‘We can try,’ he smiled, and she couldn’t help smiling back.

‘I admire your optimism, Mr MacDonald.’

He continued to smile that movie star smile and she felt her heart start to race, thumping hard inside her as her breathing quickened, her skin tingling every time he touched her. It all signalled the start of another crazy ride and she had no idea where this was going to lead, but right now she didn’t care. Dominic was here, beside her, and that was all that mattered. Who he was and who he was related to, she had to put that to the back of her mind if this relationship was going to go anywhere. But, tonight, she wasn’t even going to think about that. She was just going to enjoy having him here.

‘We’re not in the spotlight now, though. Are we?’ He moved even closer, and India knew exactly where this was heading, there was no other way it could go. There was something between the two of them that neither of them could fight any longer so it was easier all round just to give in.

‘We’re always in the spotlight, handsome,’ India smiled, running her fingers gently over the stubble on his chin. ‘Everyone knows everything we do.’

‘Yeah, well, I kinda get a kick out of that – sometimes,’ Dominic smirked, letting his hand slide up under India’s strapless dress, and just being able to feel her skin underneath his fingertips was like receiving a fix of a much-needed drug after way too long without it.

‘Don’t you think we’ve already done enough in public?’ India asked, her heart now racing at a speed that was making her breathless, the anticipation of what was going to happen next filling her with an excitement akin to that of a kid on Christmas morning.

That movie star smile lit up his face once more. ‘Baby, we’re only just getting started.’

She threw her head back and bit down on her bottom lip as he kissed the base of her throat, sliding her dress up over her thighs, removing her underwear in one swift movement, even though he was shaking, if the truth be told. Dominic MacDonald really had never been in love before, and this was all a very new and very daunting experience for him, despite the fact he was about to make love – once more – to someone he considered to be one of the most beautiful women he’d ever had the pleasure of being this close to.

She was complicated, she was crazy, she had a past that he couldn’t even begin to understand with a man he’d just found out was his father – but he wanted her more than he’d ever wanted anything before in his life. He’d thought all he’d wanted was some kind of unexplainable revenge on Michael Walsh – for what reason? He hadn’t known Dominic was his son, so how could he have done anything? How could he have been there when he hadn’t known there was a reason to be? But all Dominic wanted now was India. He didn’t want revenge; he didn’t even care that Michael was his dad. He only cared about this woman here beside him.

Sitting back against the cushions he held onto her hips as she climbed astride him, straddling him, positioning herself over him, sliding a hand round the back of his neck as she looked deep into those incredible eyes of his. The eyes of his father, but she had to get over that, she had to. Or this was going nowhere.

‘We’re going to be okay, aren’t we?’ she whispered, her need to feel him back inside her colliding with that still-present wariness of letting Michael Walsh’s son get too close to her.

‘We’ll make sure we’re okay,’ Dominic smiled, gently tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, leaning in to kiss her slowly, and in an instant any still-remaining doubts just disappeared as that bubble they wanted to retreat back into cocooned them, giving them permission to finally move this forward, to go for it. To take this relationship where it needed to go.

India smiled back, reaching down to touch him, wrapping her fingers around him as his mouth touched hers again, the kiss getting deeper as he grew harder in her hand and it was all he could do not to lose control right there and then. But he needed to hold on, he needed to be there, inside her, to be a part of her and know that he was back in her life. Back where he wanted to be. In a body so beautiful it hurt to even look at it sometimes.

‘Okay, Mr Movie Star. Are you ready for this?’ she breathed, her mouth resting on his as she spoke. But she was already guiding him in, putting him where he needed to be and as he pushed deeper, into a place so warm and perfect, he could’ve cried with relief, because he’d honestly thought he’d never feel this again. He’d honestly thought he’d lost her.

So he didn’t need to answer her question. He didn’t need to do anything except hold onto her and know that he was back. And now he finally had the chance to love her like he wanted to.

‘Take it all off,’ he whispered, desperate to see her naked, because being inside her just wasn’t enough anymore. He wanted to see everything she had, everything she could give him; he needed to see that right now. And she did exactly as he wanted, stretching out and pulling her dress up over her head, throwing it aside, arching her back as his hands covered her breasts. And he did nothing for a few seconds, just looked at her, taking her all in, his heart beating like a jackhammer against his ribs. Then, slowly and gently, he began running his fingers over her firm breasts, making her gasp out loud as, once again, the breeze blew back the curtains round the cabana, letting the outside in.

The cool evening air made India shiver, heightening everything she was already feeling. Making love with Dominic, being outside and so close to so many people, it was a rush she was in no hurry to end. And she knew Carlos would know exactly what was going on between her and this insanely handsome movie star, but at least having him out there meant that nobody else would get near them. The last thing they needed were paparazzi snaps of this. So she felt no need to stay quiet, had no qualms about shouting out or screaming Dominic’s name as he thrust deeper and deeper into her, and she helped him go as far as he could by leaning back, giving him the best view possible of everything she had to give him.

And it was a view Dominic was never going to tire of. She had the body of someone twenty years her junior, the body of an angel sent down to f*ck with every inch of him but he could handle that. He was ready for everything she had to throw at him, and right now she was giving him one hell of a ride, sending both of them crashing to a simultaneous climax that rocked the tiny cabana to it’s foundations.

‘Jesus, you kill me, baby. You freakin’ kill me,’ Dominic breathed, still holding onto her hips, his head thrown back against the sofa as he tried to get his breath back. ‘But it’s so f*cking good to be back.’

India smiled, still gripping him tight, reluctant to let him go because it felt good, having him there. It felt nice. For whatever reason.

‘Are you cold?’ he asked, opening his eyes and looking at her, still eager to take in every inch of her incredible tanned, toned and naked body with the perfect breasts and thighs so hard he had no doubt they could keep him inside her for hours without letting him go. He could stare at her for days. He could look at her forever.

She shook her head, quite enjoying the liberating feeling being naked and outside was giving her. ‘I’m fine.’

He ran his fingers gently up over her hips, running them along the curve of her waist, his eyes following their every move. ‘We are gonna be okay, baby.’ Dominic looked up, his eyes meeting hers and she smiled again, stroking his face with her fingertips, kissing him so softly it made his heart skip that proverbial beat.

‘Yeah. I know we are, Mr Movie Star.’

A movie star she was, quite possibly, falling in love with. So she really hoped that he meant what he’d said when he’d told her he was different because, right now, as she looked at him, into a face so handsome it didn’t seem real, there was more of Michael in him than she really wanted to see. But she had to get over that, they had to deal with the fact he was Michael’s son or they – as a couple – were never going to work.

But she knew, in reality, that that problem was hers rather than Dominic’s. It always had been. And it always would be.