Illusions of Love

chapter 26



The late afternoon sun beat down on the tourists lying by the huge circular pool that was situated right beside the Coconut Palm Bar. It was one of the more popular hang outs at The Amber Palace due to its almost 24/7 party atmosphere that began some time after breakfast and didn’t finish until well into the early hours, when the bar took on a more bohemian vibe and the cabanas found themselves filled with the more laid-back and chilled out.

India particularly loved this bar, especially after dark. There was just something about the people who hung out there; the way they acted, the cool image they exuded. Nobody bothered her here, at least, they hadn’t last night when she and Kenny had spent a good few hours kicking back in a private cabana, giving her a little more time away from the crazy on-set goings-on that surrounded her working days right now. Days that involved hiding from the press, avoiding questions she just didn’t know the answers to, and filming on a set that was now under such constant tight security it was ridiculous.

She sat back in her chair and pulled her dark glasses down over her eyes as she continued to watch everyone around her enjoying the afternoon sun, the shaded end of the pool crowded with people trying to cool down. It was good to be away from the movie set for a little while, good to be away from the madness, although she wasn’t away from it completely – she had a bodyguard with her at all times now, and even though he always kept a discreet distance, he was still there, watching her every move, making sure nobody got near her, nobody bothered her. But sometimes she wanted to be bothered, she wanted to feel normal. But, at the minute, that just wasn’t going to happen. Not with things the way they were.

‘You ready to have that talk yet?’

She looked up quickly, turning away just as quickly as Dominic sat down beside her, pushing his dark glasses up onto his head, staring straight ahead of him at the crowded pool.

‘Daddy not keeping you busy?’ India asked, not looking at him, keeping her dark glasses down over her eyes.

‘A bit below the belt that one, don’t you think?’

She said nothing, just continued to stare out ahead of her, although her heart had started racing and the urge to face him was overwhelming.

‘It’s been really hard, y’know. Working alongside you, after everything that’s happened.’

‘Then you should have thought about that before you started keeping secrets from me.’

‘India, will you just look at me?’

She didn’t respond, because if she looked at him she was too frightened of letting her guard down, of letting him see how she was really feeling. In front of the cameras it was easier, somehow, because she was playing a different person, she could be someone else, someone who was allowed to look at him a certain way because that was the part she was playing. But this wasn’t acting. This was real life. And she still wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do next.

Dominic got up and moved round the table so he was sitting opposite her, blocking her view of the pool and she knew it would look totally childish now if she turned her back on him. And it would only draw unnecessary attention in their direction anyway, which was something they could both do without.

She sighed, removing her sunglasses, sitting back in her chair. ‘What do you want me to say, Dominic?’

‘I just want you to talk to me.’

‘I’m talking to you now, aren’t I?’

He looked at her with those ice-blue eyes of his, staring right at her, and she swore she felt her heart flip over, causing her to take a deep breath as she briefly turned away from him, looking over towards her bodyguard who raised his eyebrows, silently asking her if she was alright. She nodded, throwing him a small, reassuring smile.

‘Is he really necessary?’ Dominic asked as she turned back to face him.

‘At the minute he is, yes. I don’t particularly want him following me around all day but it’s that or be bombarded by paparazzi and reporters wanting to know what’s happening between you and me.’

‘And what is happening between you and me?’

She stared at him, unable to tear her eyes away from his. ‘I really don’t know.’

He sat back, still looking at her, which made India feel slightly uncomfortable for some reason. A little on edge.

‘Let’s get out of here,’ he said, his eyes still fixed on hers.

‘I don’t know…’

‘Please, India. Just give me a chance to explain.’

She sighed heavily, throwing her head back. ‘I don’t know if I want to listen to any more excuses, Dominic. This is really hard...’

‘And you think I’m having it easy?’

She looked at him again. ‘I didn’t say that.’

‘Don’t I deserve just a little of your time? To explain things?’

She stood up, pushing her chair back and sliding her sunglasses down over her eyes. ‘There’s nothing to explain, really. Is there? I think we all know exactly what happened, why you did it…’

He stood up too, desperate not to let her get away from him, not this time. He was tired of the way things were, tired of only being close to her on set, tired of sleeping without her. He’d got too used to it, too used to her being around and he needed her back. He needed her, and he wasn’t going to stop until things were the way they’d used to be – before all this crap had happened.

‘Okay… okay, but… India, baby, please. I need you to just listen to me. I really need that.’

‘You’re Michael’s son, Dominic. No matter which way you look at it, you’re Michael’s son.’

‘And that isn’t my fault, honey.’

She fixed him with one last look, trying to ignore the huge dip her stomach took as she did so, the feeling of a million butterflies flying loose. ‘No, it isn’t. But how you handled it is.’

And, as she turned and walked away from him, Dominic knew this fight was going to be a whole lot harder than he’d first anticipated. He was a link to Michael Walsh, and any link to that man was a barrier for India. But a barrier he’d overcome, because if Dominic MacDonald had inherited anything from his father it was the determination to get what he wanted. No matter what.



***



Martha stood by the huge wall of windows that lined one side of the suite Reece was staying in at The Amber Palace, her arms folded as she looked out over the sprawling view of Las Vegas and the desert beyond.

She’d joined Reece in Vegas for the final few days of filming. It hadn’t been planned – she’d had other things to do in reality, new projects to talk about, meetings to go to – but the way things were here, the whole Michael/Dominic/India scenario, Martha was worried. She was worried about Reece’s reaction if anything got out of hand. She was worried about what might come out. But, more than anything, she was concerned about the fact she was keeping secrets from him. Big secrets, secrets that he’d never been privy to, but secrets he maybe should have been aware of right from the start.

India had told her everything in confidence, even though Martha suspected she’d never meant to tell her anything at all. But this wasn’t just something minor, some little white lie, something that didn’t matter, because it did matter. It mattered because it was the whole reason India had been unable to move on in all this time. It had happened seven years ago but the repercussions were still being felt now, and even Reece could see that. He just didn’t know the real reason why.

‘Everything okay? You look miles away.’

The sound of Reece’s voice made her turn around and fix a smile on her face in record-quick time. She wasn’t one of the best character actors around for nothing. She was good. ‘I’m fine, honey. I’m just fine.’

‘Look, I’m due on set soon, but, you can come with me, or you can stay here and relax. Maybe visit Charley down in the salon, go shopping…’

‘Reece, sweetheart, I think I can amuse myself, okay? I’ll be fine.’

He smiled, walking over to her, sliding his arms round her waist and pulling her close, kissing the tip of her nose. ‘I’m really glad you’re here. I mean, I know India’s here, and working with her on this movie it’s… well, apart from all the off-set drama it’s been good, good to spend some time with her. But she’s got Kenny here now, and I know she wants to be with him so, it’s good to have you around. I miss you when you’re not here.’

She smiled up at him. He was still so handsome; a beautiful, beautiful man. She loved him so much, which is why harbouring such an important secret felt so wrong. They didn’t have secrets, they never had. And she wished more than anything that she didn’t have this one.

‘Hey, I miss you too, honey. I really do.’ She reached up to touch his cheek, stroking his face gently with her fingertips as she looked into those blue-grey eyes of his. Eyes that were replicated in his beautiful daughter’s face. ‘It’s been good for you, hasn’t it? Spending this time with India?’

His face broke into a smile at the mention of his daughter, and Martha couldn’t help but smile too. He made her want to smile, that’s why she loved him so much, why she didn’t enjoy keeping things from him.

‘I can’t tell you how incredible it’s been to work with her again. She’s such a professional, and she has this amazing talent… Despite everything that’s gone on she walks out onto that set and lets nothing bother her. Nothing gets in the way. She can just switch it all off and become that person she has to be and I will never tire of watching her do that, Martha. She really does have an incredible talent.’

‘Yeah, and I think we all know where she inherited that talent from, don’t we?’

He pulled her closer, kissing her slowly, loving the fact she made him feel about twenty years younger just by smiling at him. His wonderful wife.

‘I really think we’re getting closer, Martha. Me and India. She’s opening up to me so much more, talking to me about things she never used to. She’s letting me in, and you’ll never know how much that means to me. Oh, I know there are still things she’ll never talk to me about, things I still don’t know, and I don’t think I even want to know anymore. I really don’t. Why dredge all that up again? She’s told me I didn’t need to know, and I’ll respect that.’ He smiled at her, that movie star smile that had broken the hearts of hundreds of women before her. A smile she loved because it was a smile that told her he was genuinely happy. ‘What we don’t know won’t hurt us, huh?’

She looked up into his eyes again, smiling a smile she hoped was as convincing as it had been before. ‘I guess not.’

And, as she watched him walk away, she threw her head back and sighed, closing her eyes. What they didn’t know wouldn’t hurt them. A saying that would be true, and she’d totally agree with him, if she didn’t know. But she did. And what she did with that information was still something she had yet to decide.



***



India walked into the salon and smiled at Maisy – a very pretty dark haired young woman whom India knew had once been a lead showgirl at The Maine Resort, the oldest of Vince’s Vegas hotels. She was tapping away at a computer keyboard behind the large, oversized reception desk but she’d looked up the second India had walked in, greeting her with that incredible smile of hers.

Looking around at the beautiful, almost tranquil surroundings Charley had managed to create, India couldn’t help but feel incredibly proud of her best friend. Her vision of what she’d wanted to create here at Charley’s wasn’t only unique, it was breathtaking. Within seconds of walking into the welcoming reception area it was like a feeling of calm washed over you from invisible vents and India felt her shoulders sag and her whole body feel lighter as she continued to look around, taking in the tropical plants, the bold yet relaxing colours Charley had decorated the place in, and the gentle background music playing from TV screens which carried accompanying images of beautiful landscapes, beaches and sunsets.

India had visited this salon on more than one occasion since it had opened, but every time she set foot inside it, it never failed to impress her. It was so different to the Beverly Hills branch of Charley’s. It was almost as if Charley just knew how to pitch both her salons to the right clientele. She had Beverly Hills down to a tee with the glamour and glitz that her mainly socialite clients demanded, whilst here in Vegas she had it spot on, with just the right amount of slightly-over-the-top kitsch combined with a touch of the Hollywood edge Charley’s was known for.

‘Have you got an appointment? Because, I’m not sure we can fit you in, we’re so very, very busy these days, y’know.’

India swung round to see Charley standing there, beautiful and business-woman-smart in a pair of black tailored trousers, white shirt and extremely high black heels, her dark hair piled up on top of her head. She looked calm, in control, but India knew that, inside, she must be feeling anything but.

The stories of her past seemed to keep coming every day, matching the stories coming out concerning India, Dominic and Michael. Together they were keeping the gossip columns on red alert, and it was hard. But even harder for Charley, because she had so much to lose. And it was what happened if she lost it all that concerned India.

‘You mean, you can’t squeeze me in? Me? A Hollywood movie star? Don’t you know who I am?’

They both burst out laughing, hugging each other tight.

‘You haven’t come here for any treatment though, have you?’ Charley asked, holding her friend out at arm’s length, taking in her stunning outfit of a simple short white dress that showed off her lightly tanned skin to perfection, and wedge-heeled ankle boots, her long blond hair pulled back into a loose and messy ponytail. She looked every inch the movie star, and a long way from the tomboy who’d started out on this journey two decades ago.

India shook her head. ‘Of course I haven’t. I’ve come to see you. I can get a massage anytime.’

‘From anyone in particular?’ Charley smiled. ‘Or is all of that still very much up in the air?’

‘Don’t even go there,’ India sighed, taking her friend’s arm and leading her towards the elevator. ‘Come on. Let’s go talk.’

‘India…’ Charley groaned, not really in the mood to talk about anything. She came here to forget, she had enough of the talking at home with Vince.

‘Don’t “India” me. We’re going to talk, okay?’

‘Okay,’ Charley sighed. She didn’t have the energy to fight this one.

‘And have you got any wine in that office of yours?’ India asked as the elevator opened it’s doors, leading them out onto the first floor. ‘I could do with a really large glass of anything cold and white.’

Upstairs in Charley’s office India couldn’t help but notice how Charley’s demeanour seemed to change in an instant the second the door closed behind them. That calm and in-control look had changed to one of a person who spent a lot of time putting on a front, someone who didn’t feel quite as calm as her outward appearance might have you think. But that was only to be expected. Charley was a professional out there on the floor, but behind closed doors didn’t she have a right to feel slightly more uneasy?

‘So, how are you holding up?’ India asked, sitting down on one of Charley’s huge brown sofas, crossing her legs and smiling her thanks as Charley handed her a glass of Californian chardonnay, straight from Vince’s vineyard.

‘I’m fine.’

‘Liar. You can’t kid a kidder, Charley. Come on, this is me you’re talking to.’

Charley sighed, leaning back against her desk, folding her arms. ‘It’s a nightmare, India. And I just don’t know what to do. I really don’t.’

‘I thought Vince had got some kind of injunction in place, y’know, to stop Jimmy from distributing any more of those films?’

‘He had. I mean, he has. But do you honestly think a man like Jimmy Cash is going to take notice of any injunction? Why would he? He doesn’t play by the rules, he doesn’t work that way, and you know that. You know what kind of a man he is.’

India stared down into her glass for a few seconds, remembering her brother again – her incredible, amazing brother and even now, fourteen years after his murder, she could still feel tears welling up in the back of her eyes. The pain of losing him would never go away, and it never really got any easier. She’d just learnt to deal with it.

‘I want to be there for you, Charley. You know that, don’t you? I’ve always wanted to be there for you, no matter what. So why didn’t you tell me about all of this when it started?’

‘I couldn’t, India. I just… I couldn’t.’

‘But you told Kenny.’

Charley looked right into India’s eyes, and she knew in an instant that Kenny had told her everything. ‘It was a mistake, India. A stupid, ill-thought-out mistake.’

‘You and Kenny seem to make a habit of those kind of mistakes,’ India said quietly, and Charley couldn’t help but feel she’d asked for that. Even after all this time it was obvious India still hadn’t forgotten how one small, stupid mistake with Kenny had wrecked their short marriage. Another pointless, ill-thought-out mistake. Just like the one they’d made here in Vegas except, this time, it wasn’t India’s marriage at risk. It was her own.

‘It shouldn’t have happened,’ Charley whispered, still looking at India, hoping that she understood these were exceptional circumstances, a situation that made people do things they didn’t always mean to do. ‘Vince, he… he doesn’t know.’

‘No, I’m sure he doesn’t. Come on, Charley; don’t look at me like that. I’m not going to tell him. Jesus… What kind of person do you think I am? I know the circumstances, Kenny told me. And I know you’re sorry. But you can’t let any of this put you and Vince at risk, not you and Vince. You guys are solid. He loves you like crazy, Charley. You do know that, don’t you?’

Charley nodded, blinking back frustrated tears. ‘And I love him too. But in my stupid, mis-guided way I thought keeping him in the dark about all of this was the safest thing to do… after what happened to Terry.’

India looked down into her glass again, swirling the amber liquid round for a few seconds until she realised what she was doing and took a drink instead, banishing any more memories of her brother’s tragic death to the back of her mind.

‘He’ll sort this out, Charley. Vince. He’ll sort this out, I know he will.’

Charley said nothing; she couldn’t, because every time she thought about what she was putting Vince through it ripped her apart. He shouldn’t have to be doing any of this, not when he had his own shit to deal with – the hotels, the movie. He was a very busy man. But a man who – and Charley knew India was right here – could make this better. Somehow. She hoped.

‘Anyway,’ Charley said, smiling at India, signalling a subject change was on the way, and India knew just what that subject was going to be. ‘You and Dominic.’

‘There is no me and Dominic. Not at the minute, anyway.’

‘Have you spoken to him? Since it all happened, I mean.’

‘I work with him, Charley. Of course I’ve spoken to him.’

‘Outside of the movie set, India. Y’know, Kenny’s right, you do have a tendency to revert to flippancy when faced with something you don’t want to talk about.’ Charley watched her famous friend closely, her body language immediately changing the second she’d mentioned Dominic’s name. ‘So, have you spoken to him?’

India sighed, sitting back against the soft cushions of the extremely comfortable sofa. She felt like kicking off her shoes and curling up in the corner with an old movie and a huge box of chocolates, and she felt like doing all of that with just one man. One man she was trying very hard to ignore, but failing miserably.

‘I saw him about an hour ago. Outside, by the pool at the Coconut Palm Bar.’

‘And?’

‘He wanted to talk, I couldn’t be bothered to sit through any more of his excuses. We’re no farther forward.’

‘So, that comment alone would indicate that you’d like to move farther forward. Am I right?’

India just looked at Charley, finishing the last of her wine but saying nothing.

‘What about Michael? Have you spoken to him? And I mean, again, outside of the movie set.’ Charley walked over to India and took her empty glass, immediately re-filling it with more wine.

‘No, I haven’t spoken to him. But what freaks me out more than anything is that he hasn’t even tried to speak to me. It’s like he’s waiting for the right time to hit me with something else, y’know? I just can’t trust him.’

Charley handed her the newly-filled glass of wine and poured herself a fresh glass. ‘Did you see JJ when you were back in L.A.?’

India nodded, absent-mindedly looking at the JJ tattoo on her left wrist, the tattoo she’d had done when he’d been her world, when she’d thought she’d finally found the one man she could settle down with. The one man she’d once loved more than anything. And part of her wished with all her heart that she still felt the same way, that she wasn’t having to go through all of this. She should have had the strength to make that marriage work because JJ was one in a million. But he deserved so much better than her. ‘The divorce should be final in a day or so.’ She looked up at Charley. ‘So, that’s it. Marriage number three, done. Finished.’

Charley sat down next to India, taking her hand and squeezing it gently, smiling at her. Her beautiful best friend. But a woman who just couldn’t seem to find someone to settle down with, someone who could truly make her happy. Although, deep down inside, everyone – including India – knew that only one man had ever really been able to make her happy, but that man had also hurt her in the most painful of ways and she knew that India would never get past that. Even if she wanted to. And that was still the root of all her problems, complicated even more, Charley suspected, by the appearance of his son.

‘I’ll be fine,’ India smiled back, wiping stupid tears from her eyes. ‘Jesus, how did this end up about me?’

Charley pulled her in for a hug and India held onto her tight, closing her eyes, and for one brief minute she wished they were both back in England, back behind their admin desks in that solicitor’s office in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, living an uncomplicated, carefree life. But she knew that, even with all the crap that was going on, neither of them really wanted to be anywhere else. They just wanted the circumstances to change.

‘Really. I’ll be fine. I’m just being stupid, a little over-emotional. I guess divorce is never easy, and I’m missing the kids but, hey, I’ve got mum and dad here now, haven’t I? Plenty of people to keep an eye on me.’

‘And Kenny,’ Charley smiled.

‘Yeah.’ India gave a small laugh, pulling away from Charley, sliding her dark glasses down over her eyes. The last thing she needed was anybody seeing she’d been crying. ‘I’ve always got Kenny.’

And for another of those brief moments, Charley couldn’t help but feel – for that one reason alone – incredibly envious of India. All over again.