If You Only Knew

Chapter Thirteen



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NATE WAS AN exceptional cook, and he’d outdone himself tonight. A big pot of seafood pasta, French bread, fresh green beans, and salad disappeared in no time. It had always been one of Joe’s rules that talking shop at mealtime was taboo, and tonight was no different. Unfortunately, Nate took it upon himself to entertain the crowd with stories from their past when he and Ty first became partners and started working with the DEA.

“No one wanted to work with him.” Nate made a strained face. “I was the new kid, so I got stuck. Ty already had quite a reputation by then. Fresh-faced enough to blend in with the younger crowd, he volunteered time after time for undercover assignments no one else wanted. The more dangerous the better, and if he had to beat the shit out of somebody… well, that just made it more attractive.” Nate winked at Rayna, who appeared to be hanging on his every word.

“Yep. He fired up that Harley and headed out into some situation that would make the hair stand up on the back of my neck. My job was to set up surveillance and jerk his ass out of there before it got too hot to handle. Do you know what an impossible job that was?”


Rayna studied Ty curiously. “A Harley? I didn’t know you rode.”

Nate laughed. “No offense, Rayna, but I bet there’s a lot you don’t know about our friend here.”

Walker set down his fork and pushed back his plate. “You must have done something right, Nate. You’re both still alive and, apparently, still friends.”

“Yeah. It was questionable there for a while. Then I decided if I couldn’t beat ’em, I better join ’em. Together, we took down dozens of drug rings all over Oregon. I wouldn’t be half the cop I am today if it wasn’t for Ty.” Nate’s gaze swept around the table until it landed on his partner.

Ty nodded stiffly, humbled by his friend’s sincere gratitude and embarrassed by the contemplative expressions the others wore. It was true that when he walked away from that life, he’d left it all and became someone else. While Nate launched into some of the more colorful and gruesome tales, he felt Joe and Walker glancing at him, no doubt wondering who he really was. The worst, though, was seeing the question in Rayna’s eyes. It would be best if she never had to find out.

After dinner, Ty volunteered to clean up and, to his surprise, Rayna offered to help. He rinsed and put the dishes in the dishwasher while she cleared the table and refrigerated the leftover salad. All too aware of his new resolve to salvage their friendship, he opted to remain silent. Every time he opened his mouth, he only made the situation worse.

She dried her hands on a towel as she watched him. “That person Nate was talking about—was that really you?”

He poured detergent in the dishwasher, closed the door, and turned it on before he swung slowly to regard her. “That was a long time ago.”

“Are you saying that person doesn’t exist anymore?”

He shook his head. “I’d be lying if I said that.”

She searched his face for a few seconds, then dropped her gaze. “Okay.”

Okay? What the hell did that mean?

She grabbed some leftover pasta and bread she’d set aside and started for the door.

“Where are you going?” He knew, but he wanted her to stay, even if only for a few more minutes.

“To feed Ribs the leftovers.”

“Ribs?” He chuckled.

“It fits. Don’t you think?” She grimaced. “Can we get him some dog food tomorrow?”

“We can probably do that.” He wasn’t sure what time Joe planned to leave tomorrow, but there was no sense getting into that with her now. He wasn’t ready to lose her smile just yet. “Need some help out there?”

“No.” She put her hand on the doorknob, then twisted to see him. “It’s safe here. Right?”

He nodded. “This place is a fortress. Plus, you’ve got that mangy dog out there.” He gestured toward the backyard.

Her smile returned. “He’s not mangy.” She opened the door and slipped through, leaving him to stare after her.

“She’s doing all right.” Joe stood in the kitchen doorway.

“She’ll be okay… better as soon as she gets home.” Ty turned and was instantly on guard, expecting Joe’s criticism for how he’d handled the mission.

“I can see you’re still pissed.” Joe strode farther into the room and leaned against a counter, crossing his arms. “Do you remember when Charlie died?”

Ty huffed out his breath. He’d never forget.

“I sent Charlie on that mission alone. When he needed us the most, nobody was around. When he died, I blamed myself.” A muscle in Joe’s jaw flexed. “It didn’t change anything. He’s still dead, and I still miss him. All I can do is make sure it never happens again. You know me, Ty, and you know how I operate. Did you think it would be any different for you?”

The undisguised emotion on Joe’s face dissolved the majority of Ty’s anger, and he had to swallow hard before he could speak. “I created this mess… I don’t need anyone’s help to clean it up.”

“Maybe not, but I didn’t ask Nate to help out for your benefit or even for Rayna’s. That was entirely selfish on my part. I don’t intend to lose any more friends—not like that. Remember when we went into Korea and got Walker out of that prison? Or when we took Cara off that yacht? When one of us is in trouble, someone backs us up. That’s the way this game is played.”

“That’s just it, Joe. I’m not one of us anymore.”

“The hell you’re not. Look, I don’t know what’s going on between you and Rayna right now, but you have a job and a home in Montana regardless.” Joe raised his hand in time to forestall the objection poised on Ty’s tongue. “All I’m saying is, weigh your options carefully.” Joe’s gaze shifted to the door Rayna exited through. “Now, as soon as she gets back in here, we’ll figure out what happens next.” Joe pushed away from the counter and sauntered out of the kitchen.



“ANY CHANCE HE’LL give it up?” Walker took a seat next to Rayna at the dining room table and accepted one of the beers Nate passed around.

“No.” Ty and Nate answered together. Andre’s voice sounded in Ty’s head, detailing his plans to hunt Rayna down and kill her. If Ty had learned anything from the man’s rampage through southwest Portland, it was that he didn’t issue idle threats, and he didn’t like to lose face. Ty’s gaze swept around the table and stopped momentarily on Rayna as she glanced toward Joe.

“That leaves one option. Take him out.” Joe spoke quietly.

Nate cleared his throat. “I’ve been thinking about that, and I don’t see how stopping the man is going to get Rayna, or Ty for that matter, out of the hot seat. Andre’s second-in-command will finish what he started. It’s called organized crime for a reason.”

“He’s right.” Ty tipped his beer bottle toward his partner. “He also doesn’t want me committing premeditated murder in his jurisdiction, but he’s right about Andre. I have to give him something he wants more than Rayna.”

“You mean Bree Knight. You can’t do that, Ty.” Rayna stood and stared at him in disbelief.

“I’ll do whatever has to be done to make sure you’re safe. You can’t stay locked behind a ten-foot chain-link fence for the rest of your life.” He stared her down, even though he was drowning in guilt, and her disappointment in him only served to push him farther from shore, but it didn’t make one damn bit of difference. It was the only plan that had a chance of working. He turned to Joe. “Did you find her?”

Rayna shoved her chair back and marched from the room.

Joe watched her retreat. “I found her. She’s in Alaska with her daughter, and she’s remarried.” He plucked a crumpled piece of paper from his shirt pocket and tossed it on the table. “Her phone number.”

Ty pulled the scrap of paper toward him. “I’ll call her tomorrow as soon as you leave with Rayna.”

“You plan to turn her over to him?” Walker’s voice held no indication of what he thought about that.

“Not if I don’t have to, but I won’t let him kill Rayna.” The bile rose in Ty’s throat at the thought of turning Bree over to that madman, but he wouldn’t give on this issue. Not if it meant Rayna’s life.

“I think we’ll stick around another day or so if it’s all right with you, Nate. I’ll make some calls of my own. Maybe there’s something else Andre wants.” Joe moved his chair back and stood.


Ty frowned. “Okay, but someone has to go after dog food tomorrow.”

Walker chuckled and raised his beer to his lips. “That’ll be a good job for me.”

The group disbanded. Joe and Walker headed upstairs to the rooms Nate had readied for them. Ty and Nate sat at the table.

Ty leaned on his elbows. “I don’t have a choice, Nate.”

“I’m not arguing, buddy. You’re in a tough spot.” Nate shrugged. “Maybe Joe will come up with something.”

“It’s a long shot.” Ty rose to his feet. “Did you see where she went?”

“No, but I showed her how to turn the back door alarm off earlier. She’s probably out with that damn dog.”

Ty climbed the stairs to his room, stopping to rap on her door on the way. When she didn’t answer, he swung the door open and found it empty. He continued on to his room and intended to get some much-needed sleep, but the window overlooking the backyard drew him, and he couldn’t resist. The patio below was bathed in muted light from bollards at each corner. Rayna was curled up tightly on the porch swing, and the dog—Ribs—lay on the deck at her feet.

Rayna looked so sweet, lost, and vulnerable that he almost forgot how lethal she could be. Apparently, he’d also forgotten how pissed she was at him. In the next instant, he grabbed the spare blanket at the foot of the bed and tugged the comforter loose, wrapping it around his arm. As an afterthought, he snagged a pillow.

Ty would never know if she had been asleep or not, because as soon as he opened the door and stepped on to the patio, Ribs sat up and growled low in his throat. Rayna started and raised her head, alarm in her eyes.

“It’s just me.” How long would it be before she didn’t spook at every noise? Andre should pay for that too.

“Ty? What are you doing out here?” Her voice was sleepy, and she peered at the bundle in his arms. “Did you bring me a blanket?”

“Nope.” He held up one hand. “Actually, this one is for Ribs.” He stepped cautiously toward the dog that had stopped growling and now wagged his tail lazily. Crouching beside him, he fashioned the blanket into a soft bed, then patted it invitingly. He grinned when Ribs hoisted himself up and plopped down on the warm blanket.

“Ribs, you’re a traitor.” Amusement tinged Rayna’s words.

“And this one is mine.” Ty raised the arm holding the comforter. “But I’ll share if you want.”

She fixed him with a completely distrustful gaze, and hurt shone in her eyes. “I’m not falling for that again.”

“There are no strings attached to this blanket. I only want to be a friend.”

She searched his eyes for a few seconds, skepticism in her furrowed brow.

Ty shrugged. “Besides, if I tried anything tonight, I’ve no doubt this mangy cur would eat me alive.”

Rayna reached down to pat the dog. “He’s not mangy.”

“Right. I forgot. So… is that a yes on the sharing? Because if it’s no, I’ll just take this blanket up to my room and…”

“Yes… I’ll share, Tyler Whitlock. Sometimes you are so annoying.”

Ty grinned and produced the pillow from beneath the comforter. “Admit it. I have some redeeming qualities.”

Her eyes widened, and a lazy smile made his heart ache as she grabbed the pillow. He quickly sat on the cushioned swing, guided the pillow to his lap, and spread the comforter over her. She snuggled close to him, her chilled body shocking to the touch, but he didn’t move away. Her gaze met his with a hooded question in their depths, and she remained quiet for the longest time.

Finally, her lips pursed, and frustration drew her brows together. “Damn you, Ty. We’re supposed to be on the same side.”

He wanted to wrap his arms around her and capture her pouty lips, but he couldn’t—not and make everything right with her. He was destined to be her friend, and he was going to be the best damn friend she ever had.

Pulling her hand to his lips, he kissed it lingeringly before placing it on her stomach and tucking the blanket securely around her.