“The Commander leaned forward and said, ‘Yes, in fact, I am … but I’d like to know what drove you, what motivated your mission. Did you honestly think it would work? That you, one man, could somehow influence the people of our society, and change the way our system works?’”
Cole stops, and I raise my eyebrows, urging him to go on. So far, nothing he’s said seems horrible enough for him to be afraid to tell me. I start to relax a little, relieved.
“The man took a deep breath, folded his arms across his chest, stared right into the Commander’s eyes, and said, ‘Like I’ve always said: You can overcome anything, short of death.’”
I gasp. It feels like someone punched me in the stomach and then drop-kicked me in the head.
Did I really just hear that? I shake my head as tears sting my eyes like needles.
“No!” I cry out, slamming back into the wall.
“Lexi, I’m so sorry.” Cole’s voice cracks.
I don’t want to believe it’s true, but my ears ring with my father’s words.
“You? It was you who … arrested … my father?” I spit out.
“Yes.”
“Why? He did nothing wrong!” I say through gritted teeth, tasting the salt from my tears.
“I didn’t have a choice. You know that.”
“Did you torture him?”
“Lexi, please … ”
“Answer me!”
“No … please, you don’t want to hear this.”
“Oh my God, you did! I want to know every single detail, even if it kills you to say it.”
“The Commander.” Cole takes a step toward me. “That bastard ordered me to follow through with the interrogation. And Lexi, you know I didn’t want to. It was a requirement of training, and I never had a choice.”
A blood-curdling scream bounces off the bare halls. My scream.
“What exactly did you do? What did you do to my father? And don’t lie to me, Cole! This is my father we’re talking about! I need to know everything.” Spit flies from my mouth, and my ears ring.
“Lexi, trust me, you don’t want the nightmares, the visuals, the sounds. They will haunt you as they do me.”
But I stand my ground, and by the look on his face, he’s well aware I’m not letting this go. “Cole, the truth. Now.”
“The Commander needed to know what your father knew, what his plans were, and he was willing to do whatever it took to get the answers.” He pauses. “One by one, the Commander forced me to extract his fingernails. Your father grit his teeth, and even though I knew it was agonizing for him, he said nothing.” Sweat pours down Cole’s face, the vein pulsing in his forehead. “When that didn’t work, I punched him in the face multiple times until there was blood gushing from his nose and he was practically gagging on his own blood. His teeth hit the floor, and his eyes were swollen shut.” Cole takes a deep breath and clenches his fists.
“‘Keep going,’ the Commander ordered. So we waterboarded him several times, and I felt sick, sick to my stomach as he almost drowned every time. I remember trying to breathe for him as he was gasping for air. He was limp in my arms when I dragged him back to the chair under the lights.
“‘Sir,’ I said to the Commander. ‘I think he’s had enough.’ But he said, ‘You’re only done when I say you’re done, now continue, soldier.’ He questioned your dad. ‘Tell me who you’re working with,’ he commanded. But your dad didn’t break. The Commander screamed at him, ‘I know your family, I know your sexy, beautiful wife. I could take her for my own when you’re dead.’ Your father didn’t flinch as the Commander went on describing your family in detail. ‘Your oldest son, Keegan …’ Your father grimaced at the mention of his name. ‘It’d be so easy to have him accused. I could even tell him you’re the one who did it. And Lexi, sweet, pretty, young Lexi, with her turquoise eyes and her curly hair … she’d make a great whore in the Hole.’ That’s when your dad finally started crying.
“But he still didn’t slip, not once. Not even when the Commander tore off his shirt and made me handcuff him to the table. Your father kept his head down, and I remember hearing him pray. My hand shook as I held the leather handle of the whip. My palms were sweaty, making it harder to grip … and there was a lump in my throat that I couldn’t swallow. The Commander removed his chair, and then your father leaned onto the table for support, his hands still cuffed to the bar. I stood still, like stone. Looking at his scar-less back, knowing I was about to tear it to shreds.
“‘Hamilton, are you ready to talk?’ the Commander asked him.
“‘I have nothing to say,’ your dad replied in a calm tone.
“‘You know I have the power to take everything away from you,’ the Commander screamed in frustration. I could see the red flush crawling up his neck as his eyes bulged in that terrible way we both know so well.
“With blood spurting from his mouth, your dad said, ‘Even if you kill me, my family will become stronger, more powerful than you can dream. So get on with it.’