Going Under

“I have a good work ethic,” Ryan replied, grinning.

“Indeed.” I plopped down on the bed beside him. No point in trying to be coy about it. I promised myself that I would only respond to the kiss, not initiate it. “So where do you work?”

“A game store,” he said.

“Like video games?”

“Yep.”

“So you play video games a lot?”

“Yep.”

“You don’t strike me as dorky,” I said, then instantly regretted it.

Ryan laughed. “I don’t think you have to be a dork to like gaming.”

I smiled sheepishly. “Oh.”

“I do like the mechanics behind it, though,” Ryan said. “So that may be where the dork factor comes in.”

I grinned and inched a bit closer.

“So how’s your mom doing in California?” Ryan asked. He scooted a little ways away from me. I guess I made him uncomfortable. I should have sat on his desk chair instead, but it would look awkward if I moved now.

“She’s fine,” I replied. “I talk with her once a week.”

“I bet she misses you a lot,” Ryan offered.

I nodded. “I’m glad I stayed here, though. I’m getting to know my dad all over again, and it’s fun. I probably hang out with him way more than most teenage girls.”

Ryan nodded.

“Truth is, I like it. I didn’t know we’d get so close so fast. It’s almost like there weren’t those years in between when we didn’t live together.”

Ryan nodded again.

We sat in an uncomfortable silence, and since Ryan didn’t look like he was itching to say anything, I spoke up.

“So do you plan on telling me anything about yourself other than you like to play video games?”

“What do you want to know?” he asked.

“Well, for starters, how long have you lived here?” I asked. I ran my hand back and forth over his comforter.

“All my life.”

“So you’ve been going to Charity Run since ninth grade?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Do you have any other siblings?”

“No.”

“And what are your hobbies?”

“I feel like I’m being interviewed,” he said.

I smiled. “Well, you don’t offer anything. I have to ask.”

“Brooke, why don’t we talk about you instead? You seem much more interesting.”

I started feeling frustrated. “I’m sure that’s not true. Why are you so mysterious?” I tried to sound light, but I think it came out as an accusation instead.

Ryan was quiet for a moment.

“Look, you probably don’t want to be associated with me at school, okay?”

What the hell did that mean?

“I guess I’m a bit of a pariah. And I don’t mind. I just don’t wanna drag you down.”

I looked at him, astonished. “Okay. You just upped the mysterious factor by a trillion.”

He laughed. It sounded genuine, dark and rich—that male laughter that’s so damn sexy.

I inched a little closer, and this time he didn’t move.

“It’s your senior year, and you should meet people and make friends and have fun,” he said.

“I’m meeting you,” I offered. It came out sounding flirty and sensual.

Ryan chuckled. “You’re going to be my trouble this year, aren’t you?” he asked softly.

Hell yeah I was.

I looked at him and let myself get lost in those translucent eyes. I didn’t care if they held a bunch of secrets he was unwilling to share. I just knew that I was hungry to be touched, and to be touched by someone I wanted.

“I don’t even know you,” he said. He lifted his hand to the back of my neck, brushing me lightly with his fingertips.

“Same goes for you,” I replied. I grazed his neck with my fingertips in much the same way.

It was incredibly intimate, sitting there, rubbing one another’s necks, foreheads pressed together so that our lips were mere centimeters apart. I thought it might be more intimate than sex, and I didn’t know what I was doing. The rational part of my brain screamed this was much too soon. The sexual part cheered me on. The vengeful part scolded me for seducing the wrong guy.

“I think you’re full of secrets,” Ryan whispered.

“I know you are,” I whispered back.

“All right then. We can each share one. But only one,” he said.

“Do we get to ask each other?”

Ryan tensed for a moment, hand frozen on the back of my neck. “I guess.”

“Why were you at Beth’s funeral?” I asked. I didn’t even have to think about it.

“I knew her. She went to our high school. I heard what happened and just felt like I needed to go.”

I felt the instant, unsettling tears in the back of my eyes threaten to surge over my lids and ruin this intimate moment.

“Why were you at Beth’s funeral?” Ryan asked.

I swallowed. “She was my best friend.”

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