“My dad said that one look was all it took. Well…..for him anyway.” AJ smiled again. “Mom wasn’t as convinced as he was. Being with him meant leaving her family behind and starting over. I guess my dad won that argument too. He can be relatively persuasive.”
“Have you ever been there?” I asked.
“Japan? Yeah. My dad still insists on visiting every summer. You’d think my mom would be eager to get back, but she protests almost every year. Dad thinks she just hates the long flight, but I don’t think that’s it.”
“What’s your theory?” I asked.
“Well, I remember the trip we took when I was like eight or nine. The day before we were scheduled to leave she was crying uncontrollably. Like…..the whole day! It was like she was reliving that moment again, when she left to move here with my dad.”
AJ’s intuitiveness definitely impressed me. He could’ve easily written his mother’s feelings off as nothing more than her dreading the long flight as his father had, but he saw that it was something much deeper than that.
“That makes sense.” I replied. “I can’t imagine not having my family around. Don’t get me wrong, my dad can be a bit overbearing at times, but they are really important to me. As much as I look forward to leaving for college and having more freedom, I get sad when I think about not being able to see my parents every day.”
“Yeah, that’ll be strange. My mom won’t be able to handle the thought of three states separating her from me.”
“What school are you planning to attend?” I inquired.
“I just got my acceptance letter from Westwood a couple weeks ago. What’s your plan?”
“I’m still waiting to hear back from Charleston.” I was secretly nervous about being denied admission, but I tried to push that out of my mind. “It’s a little scary to think of not knowing anyone.”
AJ looked at me curiously. “What about this Antonio guy? Isn’t he going with you?”
I hesitated before answering. “No, he’s got a scholarship to Blanchard. But he said that’s only like an hour away from Charleston.”
There was an uncomfortable silence before A. J. went on. “Hmm.”
“What?” I asked, unsure of what he was thinking.
“Nothing, it’s just…” He stopped.
“Just what?”
“I was just wondering how that’s gonna work out…..the long distance thing, but I guess it’s none of my business.”
“Well that’s not really long distance. It’s only an hour…..but who knows what could happen by then,” I replied carelessly.
AJ looked at me thoughtfully as if he was trying to decipher the true meaning behind my words, but he didn’t say anything. Replaying my own statement in my head, I stared off into space. What could happen by then? I uncrossed my legs and stretched out on my side with my feet hanging off the bed.
“Finally,” AJ sighed.
“Finally what?”
“It’s been like over an hour and you’re just now getting comfortable around me.”
“I was never uncomfortable,” I said defensively.
“Yeah, okay.” He flashed that smile again.
“I was just…..being cautious.”
“Cautious?” He asked. “That’s an interesting word choice.”
I sighed and then continued. “You make me…..act differently than I usually do.”
“What’s that mean?” He stared at me inquisitively as when he asked.
“I don’t know…..I just don’t seem to do what I know I should when it comes to you.”
He smiled. “I still don’t understand.”
“Like responding to your text last night; like asking you to call me when I’m already in a relationship with Antonio; like you being here for instance; I know that this is all wrong, and yet…..here you are,” I said, motioning toward him with my hand. There was a brief silence as I decided to admit more than I’d originally intended. “You even have my feelings all mixed up.”
AJ gazed at me thoughtfully for a few seconds while he considered everything I’d just said. “As much as I don’t want to, would it make it easier for you if I backed off…..just left you alone?”