Livvie shook her head.
“I don’t need you to apologize anymore. We’re together and I don’t need you feeling bad about it. I just want you to stop pushing me.” She gripped my shoulder and shook me playfully. “I need to know how we arrived here, but it doesn’t mean I’m not happy to be where I am. I’m here, with you. That’s nothing either of us should be sorry about.”
“It doesn’t seem that way sometimes. You care about me, Livvie. I know you do. Except you won’t say it because you’re punishing me for what I did. I know I deserve it, but stop pretending you’ve forgiven me. If you want the truth from me, start being honest.” I felt the shift in power between us. Livvie had me where she wanted me, but I had her too. We had each other, and I liked knowing it wasn’t something either of us could surrender easily.
She put her head down on my chest in supplication. She could ply me so easily sometimes. If I had anything to do with her ability to wield power through submission, then I’d done my best work in Livvie. However, I doubted that was the case. She’d been playing me since the day we met in one fashion or another.
“I forgive you, Caleb. I’m just… angry. You’re angry too. I don’t like how easily you can hurt me.”
“It’s not easy, Livvie. I don’t like hurting you. That’s not fair.”
She made a growling sound. I almost laughed but managed to hold it in.
“I didn’t mean it like that,” she said. “I mean… you left. You could leave again. You think about leaving and going back to that life. How is that supposed to make me feel?”
I wanted to get up and throw things around the room. Livvie could be so infuriating.
“The only reason I said that is because you do the same to me. One minute you can’t live without me and you want me to treat you rough. The next minute you ask me if I’ve killed someone. Casually! As if I ever killed anyone on a whim. Am I supposed to believe you want to spend the rest of your life with someone you think is capable of those things? If so… you’re definitely not the person I remember.”
Livvie smiled.
“The rest of my life? You’re ambitious.”
I took in a breath and let it out in rush. Yes, she was infuriating. I had to laugh to keep from shaking her.
“I… fine. I’m ambitious.” Unable to resist, I added, “It’s not like I have anything else to do with forever. My schedule is wide open.”
“In that case, can I ask my questions?” She smiled sheepishly.
I sighed.
“Shit. Come on, then.”
We spoke for hours, it seemed. How many people had I killed? Why had I killed them? Did I get rid of everyone at the mansion? What happened to Celia (she’s very much alive)?
I answered all her questions as quickly and efficiently as I could and without becoming emotional about them. I didn’t regret the lives I’d taken. I had never killed indiscriminately. I only felt guilt for those I’d put in harm’s way.
I didn’t care for the questions involving Rafiq, of which there were few, or the ones having to do with Livvie’s and my history, of which there were many.
“Did you like the things you did to me?” she asked. I was mentally and physically exhausted.
“Did you?” I asked. I hoped she’d get the hint and stop asking me so many damn questions.
“Some of them,” she whispered softly.
I turned my head toward her and stared. She was blushing. Things were finally getting interesting.
“Such as? And don’t say the spanking—I know you love the spanking.”
“I… well, it’s mostly the spanking, but I like… other stuff too. It’s your fault. You’ve turned me into a sexual deviant like you.” She kissed my chest.
I laughed.
“Lucky me.”
“You could… tie me up. If you wanted. If you… like that.” Livvie’s finger slid beneath the sheets and caressed my dick. I groaned.
“Kitten… I’m…” I was distracted. Her fingers wrapped around my flesh and began stroking. “I’m beat all to hell. I don’t think…” I trailed off as my eyes slid shut.
“Would you like that, though?” Her voice was small and shy despite the boldness of her touch.
“Yes,” I whispered. “I’d like that very much. I miss… god, that feels good.” She’d slid her hand to my balls, her nails dragged slightly over the sensitive skin.
“What do you miss?” she whispered. Her leg wound around mine. My hand rested on the small of her back and I could feel her starting to rock against me.
“Control,” I managed. “I miss having control.” I lifted my hand from her lower back and put it on the back of her head.
“Over me?” she panted.