Even the animals rustling in the nearby bushes stilled, the birds’ chirps faded away. I had thought he was winding me up.
I’d been keeping my barriers up so high since arriving in New York, both because of my efforts to grow stronger and also to keep my defences at the ready. Plus, I’d been within Academy walls and their shields almost the entire time. Had Phoenix been trying then, but unable to get to me?
‘Oh, my God,’ I said to myself, remembering my dreams … We need to talk.
He had been trying to reach out this whole time and I had only shut him out.
Stupid!
Right there and then – refusing to let another moment go by with all those children locked up and at Lilith’s mercy – I decided to do something I was sure I’d live to regret.
A few hours later, I was running through my workout movements on the patch of grass between the house and the river, when Lincoln emerged and slumped into one of the large rocking chairs, still half-asleep. He was wearing grey cotton sweat pants and a white T-shirt, his hair was all messy and I could tell just by looking he was still bed-warm.
Breathe.
I almost fell over when he leaned back to stretch his arms over the back of the chair, exposing more than a touch of bare skin at his waistband. There was no denying all of our recent time together was affecting me.
Breathe!
I turned my back on him. ‘There’s coffee on the table inside,’ I said, oh-so-casual.
I heard the rocking chair creak, the door swing open and then again when he returned. ‘Thanks,’ he said.
I shrugged, still moving through some strength exercises.
‘Want some company?’ he asked, coming down the stairs.
Well, there’s a loaded question.
I looked at him quickly, so as not to stare. He looked gorgeous and mostly because he was relaxed instead of tense with overthinking everything. Just him.
We ran through a few drills, mostly just for something to do. Neither one of us suggested we spar. We both knew that wasn’t a great idea right now. Playing with fire and all.
Finally, we settled down on the verandah. As each of us claimed a rocking chair I thought to myself, This will always be my rocking chair and that one will always be his. As if we might spend a version of forever here, together.
‘We need to talk about Phoenix,’ I said, killing any kind of peace that had settled. Because despite my earlier thoughts – it didn’t mean we shouldn’t be prepared.
Lincoln’s expression shut down and he took a sip of his freshly made coffee.
Okay, I’ll start.
‘There are kids involved, Linc, and we can’t keep ignoring that the only reason you haven’t returned him is because of me. I saw you fighting him at the Academy. You were merely fending him off.’
Lincoln raised an eyebrow at me.
‘It’s true,’ I said.
He stared into his mug.
‘Look, we don’t even know if returning Phoenix would mean killing me. I could survive …’ I said, even though we both knew that was unlikely. I had no control over my powers when Phoenix chose to reinstate the wounds that Onyx had given me that night at Hades and Lincoln’s healing powers were simply not strong enough on their own.
Lincoln was silent and I thought he wasn’t going to answer so I opened my mouth to start argument number two, but he beat me to it.
‘I can’t do it,’ he said. ‘I know that you want me to step up to this, but I can’t. I won’t.’
My heart tightened at his words. They were enticingly dangerous. But we were Grigori and that meant other things came before us.
‘Okay,’ I said, the word sticking in my throat. ‘Under one condition.’
‘Which is?’
‘You’ll never put me before an innocent life. If it comes down to a choice, and Phoenix is a danger to others, you need to promise me you won’t hesitate.’ I looked at him, forcing his gaze up until it met mine. ‘Promise.’
His shoulders dropped, deflated as he said, ‘Jesus, Vi. Jesus.’ He sighed. ‘Okay.’
After arguing for over an hour, I managed to talk Lincoln into letting me call Steph on the disposable phone. I didn’t mention I’d already given it a go earlier.
‘One minute and I’ll be timing you,’ he said.
The argument and his bossiness on the subject had put me into a stubborn mood, so I turned my back to him as I dialled. Steph, Salvatore, Dapper and Onyx were still on their crusade and time between talks for Steph and me had been the longest we’d ever gone since first becoming friends. I waited nervously and almost jumped for joy when I heard her answer the phone with a cautious, ‘Hello?’
‘Steph!’ I yelled in my excitement. ‘It’s me!’
‘Vi!’ she squealed back. ‘Oh my God, we’ve been so worried. Griffin filled us in. Where are you?’
‘I can’t … I have to be really careful what I say in case your phones are being tapped. And I only have a minute to talk before Lincoln hangs up,’ I said.
‘Sounds like trouble in paradise.’