Born to Ride_A Clubhouse Collection

chapter 13

MEADOW

Jump my sweet, accept defeat.

My fingers tremble as I take hold of the door handle. I shove it open, and blink through the blurring in my vision. I need to find Axel. What I did back there...it was so cold...so heartless. I walk down the halls, and my head is spinning from the drugs that were clearly put in my drink earlier. I run into Jax in the hall, and his eyes are frantic. When he sees me, he storms over and grips my shoulders.

“Where the f*ck is he?”

What.

“I don’t...”

“Where the f*ck is Axel?”

Oh God, he’s gone.

“I don’t...know...”

“He’s gone, we’re on lockdown, and he’s gone. What the f*ck happened?”

I ignore him as I step past his body, feeling everything in mine shaking. Where would Axel go? I move through the halls past people like a zombie, keeping my eyes fixed on the door. The minute I step out of it, I hear Colt’s voice thunder through the night. “Meadow just left. Get her back, now!”

Even though my leg is still achy, I pick up into a run, heading for the gate. The moment I reach it, I launch upward, tangling my fingers through the wire. I haul my body up and over, scratching myself on broken bits of wire. I land with a thump on the other side, and I cry out, but I don’t stop. I get to my feet and I begin to run alongside of the road, heading for the bridge and the trees that lie beside it.

I need to find Axel.

I reach the bridge within five minutes, and I begin to cross it but skid to a halt when I see the shadowy form standing over the other side of the railings. Axel. My heart leaps into my throat. Is he going to kill himself? I force my legs to move, even though all they want to do is stay glued to the ground. I reach the railings, and wind begins whipping my hair across my face. I stare at him, and I see the pain in his features, but I know he’s not going to hurt himself.

I can see it in his eyes.

So, I do the only thing I can think of. I climb over the railings, and stand beside him.

He turns, and his eyes widen slightly, but he says nothing.

“You know, jumping off... it helps. It gives you a sense of power, a sense of freedom. It used to scare me, but now, somehow, it soothes me. Jump with me, Axel.”

I reach my hand out, and he turns, staring down at it with confusion in his gaze. I swallow as I peer down at the water below us. My entire body begins to tingle, and a feeling of fear fills my chest. It’s terrifying being up here, but the moment you let go, that fear is replaced with relief. For a moment, just a moment, you feel free. I stare at my blank hand, wondering if he’ll take it.

“You can trust me,” I whisper. “I know I let you down once, but I won’t do it again.”

Just as I’m about to give up and pull it away, he reaches out, and his large fingers curl through mine.

We don’t look at each other. We just step over the side.

Together.

~*~*~*~

MEADOW

The minute we begin to fall, I feel my heart leap into my throat, and fear course through my veins. It’s an addictive feeling, one I’m growing accustomed to. The minute our bodies hit the water, and that all familiar sting radiates over my skin. I feel my heart begin to calm, and a sense of peace washes over me. I surface before Axel, but when he comes up, I hear his rough coughing.

I can see him beneath the moonlight, and I watch with need as his hair falls across his forehead, making him look so ridiculously perfect. He meets my gaze, and I’m really not sure what is going to come next. I hurt him. I pushed all his limits. I expect, more than anything, that he will open his mouth and spit curses at me, making me regret every second of what I did earlier.


Like I don’t already regret it enough.

But he doesn’t yell at me, or spit curses. No...he lunges towards me in the water, and his fingers curl around the back of my head. I gasp, but he smothers it quickly, by pressing his lips over mine. My entire body sinks into him, and a contented sigh leaves my lips. He crushes his lips harder against mine, turning our kiss from demanding to desperate. I reach up and tangle my fingers into his hair, tugging him closer to me.

He begins pulling our bodies backward until we reach the bank. Wrenching his mouth from mine, he lifts me, and places my body on the soft grass. Moments later, he’s beside me, laying me down, pressing his lips to my cool, wet cheeks. He snakes his tongue out, sliding it across and over my flesh before pressing his lips back against mine and kissing me once more. His free hand slides down my side, finding the hem of my shirt.

The moment I feel his fingers slide up underneath it, I groan. His fingers tickle my flesh as he moves them higher, finding the curve of my breasts. With a groan, he cups them, massaging them in his big palms. I whimper, and arch my back, not getting enough of what I need from him. What I’ve needed for so long. He is my undoing, and nothing I tell myself will change that.

I reach up, and slip my own hands under his shirt, finding his hard, wet flesh. I gently press my nails into his skin, and a ragged groan leaves his lips. He takes hold of my pants, and he yanks at them, pulling them down as he pulls his body away from mine. I moan as he moves lower, taking hold of my panties and tearing them off in one quick swipe. Then his hands are on my hips, and he’s using his face to spread my legs, before his mouth finds my p-ssy.

I drop my head back into the grass, and I arch into him, mewling his name as he slides his tongue up my slit, and then circles it around my sensitive *. I feel him nip at it with his teeth before removing a hand from my hip, and gently sliding a finger inside my damp opening. Oh, God. Oh, yes. I cry out, and writhe beneath him as he moves his tongue faster in perfect rhythm with his finger.

I’m on the edge.

“Axel,” I breathe. “Oh God.”

He grunts against my flesh, and then his teeth close over my *, and I come so hard I see white. My entire world is taken away from me for a second, and all I can hear are my own screams of pleasure. Before I’ve even come down from my orgasm, before my body has stopped shaking, he’s over me, his hips between my legs, the rough material of his jeans pressing against my exposed *.

“F*ck me,” I beg, needing him inside me, needing to feel him pounding into my flesh.

“F*ck,” he growls, reaching down between us, and yanking his jeans down. I feel the moment his cock is freed because the head spears against my opening, giving me a taste of what’s to come.

“Now, Axel,” I breathe. “F*ck. Me.”

He reaches down by my side, and takes my hands, lifting them above my head. I squirm beneath him, loving that he’s restraining me. His chest rumbles with want, and I know he likes it when I fight. So, I continue squirming. I continue tugging my hands in his. He moans, and then he jerks his hips forward, filling my p-ssy with his sweet, hard cock in one swift movement.

I scream. I can feel every inch of him inside me, and the burning pain that’s shooting into my pelvis is exquisite. Axel hisses through clenched teeth, and he rotates his hips, not pulling out of me, but letting me feel all of him. Oh. F*ck. Yes.

He slowly slides his cock out, and then he plunges back in again, causing my body to slide up the grass just a little. God, I want to touch him, I want to put my hands on those bulging arms, I want to put my lips on his skin, I want to taste him, and feel every part of him.

“Let my hands go,” I beg. “I want to touch you.”

“No,” he grunts, jerking his hips again, and driving his cock deeper.

“Please,” I whimper, tugging my hands again.

“God,” he growls, and I realize my fight is turning him on.

I decide, in that heated moment, it’s turning me on too.

“Let me go,” I plead, squirming beneath him.

“Stop movin’, God, you know I f*ckin’ love it.”

I tug hard, and one of my hands comes free. I reach up, and I shove my fingers into his hair, tugging his head back. “Let. Me. Go.”

He lets off a ragged groan, and I watch the muscles in his neck work while his head is on this angle. I lift my head, and press my lips to the bulge in his throat, and he groans. His hips work faster, and I can feel his piercings rubbing every part inside my body. God, I want to come, I need to come. I haven’t had a man f*ck me like this before; so raw, so brutal, so completely f*cked up.

“Axel,” I murmur, “I need to come.”

“Then come,” he grunts, thrusting his hips harder. “Cricket, come for me.”

Oh God, when he calls me Cricket...it tugs something deep inside. He rotates his hips again, and his jaw is tight and straining. He wants to come, too, but he’s holding back. I feel myself tightening around him, and it seems, in the throes of passion, that I need something to take me over too. “R-r-restrain me,” I rasp.

“What?” he chokes.

“Restrain me!” I cry out, arching into him.

He moves quickly, taking my hands again and shoving them painfully behind my back, which means they’re under my and squashed against the grass. His lips crush down on mine, and like this, I can’t move.

It’s all I need. I come, and I come with force. My screams fill the night, and my body shakes uncontrollably.

Then Axel is pulling out of me, and jerking my body up.

His cock is in my mouth, and I can taste myself, and him, all mixed in one. I groan raggedly, and I take him as deep as I can.

“F*ck, Cricket,” he bellows, as the first warm spurt of come hits my tongue.

I take all of him, relishing the taste of our arousal. He jerks his hips, fingers tangled in my hair, until there’s nothing left. Then slowly, he slides his cock from my mouth, and presses my face against his belly. I can feel his muscles bulging against my cheeks. I take the moment that’s been given to me, and I wrap my arms around him, holding him to me.

“Well, well, well, how f*ckin’ sweet.”

I jerk back at the voice that has come from behind us in the darkness. Axel’s entire body stiffens, and he’s on his feet in a split second, jeans up, gun drawn. I scurry about for my pants, and I jerk them on before getting to my feet beside him. He takes my arm, and pulls me behind his body.

“F*ckin’ the daughter of the man you killed? That’s low even for you, Axel. I bet she likes it when you make her fight, doesn’t she?”

Axel growls, and his hand goes to his gun. “What the f*ck are you doin’ here, Beast?”

“I’m here to get what’s mine. I believe she’s right behind you.”

“She’s not yours, she’s mine, and if you so much as take a step toward her, I’ll blow your f*ckin’ brains out.”

I peer around Axel to see a large man standing with a massive shotgun in his hands. He’s huge, with a bald head, a long beard, and tattoos covering all of his skin. My eyes widen, and I step closer to Axel, suddenly needing to feel safe.

“I wonder what she’ll look like on her knees with her hands tied behind her back, sucking a poor victim’s cock. You’d like that, wouldn’t you, Axel? Tell me, does she know all your dirty little secrets? Does she know what you did to them?”

Them?

“I did nothing,” Axel roars, “you piece of shit.”

“Now, now, Axel, don’t lose your temper. We’re just old friends talking.”

“Three seconds, Beast,” Axel warns.

I hear the cocking of a gun, and I stare around again to see Beast pointing the gun at Axel. My heart leaps into my throat, and I gasp.

“Step around him, girl, and come to me. Even if he shoots me, I’ll make sure I blow his brains out before I go down. Come to me, and I won’t hurt him.”

I take a step around Axel.

“Don’t f*ckin’ move, Meadow,” he warns.

“Three seconds, and he’s bloody chunks on the ground,” Beast snarls. “One...”

I take another step.

“Meadow!” Axel growls.

“Two.”

I rush toward Beast, just as he raises his gun. It takes me only a second to realize he’s going to shoot Axel anyway, there’s something in his eyes. I lift my fist, and I punch him hard in the throat. He makes a gagging sound, and stumbles backward. I hit him again, cutting off his air supply. He falls to the ground, and wheezes, panting for air. Axel turns his gun on him, and shoots him in the leg.

“Why don’t you just kill me here and now?” Beast roars through heavy pants.

Axel takes my arm, and begins pulling me away. “Because you’re going to suffer first. I’ll be back for you, you f*cking bastard.”

Axel pulls me again, and we run up the bank and towards the road. The wind whips against my skin, and I feel my body trembling with cold. We don’t say anything the entire way back to the compound; I don’t even know why Axel left Beast there. It just gives me more confirmation that he needs to make Beast pay, and shooting him like that, with no fight, isn’t the way he wants this to end.

That frightens me.

As soon as we step back into the compound, Axel turns to me, his eyes scanning my face.

“Where the hell did you learn to throat-punch?”

I meet his eyes dead on. “I’ve learned a lot. I’ve had a badass biker chasing me for over a year.”

For the first time in the years since darkness consumed Axel’s life, I see him smile.

And it’s beautiful.

~*~*~*~

MEADOW

I sleep for two solid days after that, exhausted both physically and mentally. I can’t function without rest, and Axel has given me what I need for showers, so I finally feel refreshed.

I wake on the morning of day three to the sun shining through and into my eyes. I groan and stretch, noticing that the pain in my leg has finally faded to nearly nothing. I peer around the empty room, and see the space beside me hasn’t been slept in.

Which means Axel hasn’t come back in here.

He’s been avoiding me once again, and I won’t lie and say I’m not frustrated by that. After what happened at the bridge the other night, I thought we might have broken some ice, but it turns out nothing has changed. He’s still as angry as he was before, but I will give it to him—he’s not snapping at me...as much. I close my eyes for a moment, knowing I should just leave, but also knowing that my heart isn’t going to allow that.

I can’t turn my back on him again.

I get out of the bed, stretching with a loud yawn. I ruffle about until I find a dress and some panties, and then I head out into the halls. It’s quiet, which is unusual. I don’t know where the guys are.

I run into April when I step into the kitchen. She’s making herself some coffee. When she sees me, her eyes narrow and a scowl forms on her face.

“Well, well, I can’t believe you’re still hanging around.”

I put a hand on my hip, and lean against the counter. “What would you have me do? Go out and get shot?”

She shrugs, and chews on a fingernail. “I really don’t care what happens to you.”

“Look,” I say, walking over and taking a coffee cup. “I get it. I wouldn’t like me, either. You’re what he’s had for many years, and I’ve come in, and suddenly he’s not looking at you the same. That’s not my fault. I didn’t ask to be here anymore than you want me here.”

She narrows her eyes, and studies me. Then, she sighs. “I’ve always known I came second to you. Not even I’m that stupid.”

“Axel doesn’t like me, April.”

“Do you honestly believe that?”

I turn to her, my eyes wide. “Do you have any idea how he’s treated me in the past week?”

“Do you have any idea how he would have treated you if you were anyone else? Do you not think that if you weren’t important, that he wouldn’t have just shot you, instead of chasing you for over a year?”

I’d never thought of it like that. My heart flutters.

“He didn’t kill me because he’s known me since I was a young girl. It’s got nothing to do with caring, or anything else.”

She snorts. “If you say so, but I can tell you now, Axel looks at you like you’re something different.”

I shake my head. I can’t believe it...not after everything Axel has said and done.

“So you’re telling me he hasn’t f*cked you then?”

I feel my cheeks heat, and she snorts. “Exactly.”

“That means nothing. Axel probably f*cks half the women in this compound.”

“No,” she says, her eyes growing a touch sad. “I’m the only one.”

Really? She’s the only one?

“Why?”

She glances at the door for a second, before saying, “Because I let him f*ck me the only way he knows how.”

“Restrained?” I say in a small, timid voice.

“Restrained, and fighting. It was good...for a while...I thought it was just a fetish, but I quickly realized that it ran far deeper. I started digging, I overheard things, and I figured it out. Axel was abused. I don’t know how, exactly, but when Beast took him for all those months, something bad happened. It f*cked him up. Now, he needs to f*ck women in a certain way to get off, it’s imbedded in his head. He won’t change who he is. I tried...I thought maybe I could be the one to save him, but then I heard him dreaming, and I knew there was only one person who could save Axel Wraithe.”

“And that is?” I say, feeling my eyes grow wide.

“You.”

I shake my head again. “Me?”

“You’re something to him, even if he won’t admit it. Don’t give up on him. I’m a lot of things, hell, I’m probably what you’d call a whore, but I see something in Axel that can’t be put back together by just anyone. It takes a special person, someone who knew what he was before all this. Don’t walk away, not if you don’t have to...I think he needs you.”


She gives me a weak smile, and walks out of the room, leaving me standing there...confused. I thought April was just a cheap f*ck for Axel, but I can see she actually cares about him, and I feel bad for her. Sometimes you just know you’re not enough for someone, no matter how desperately you want to be.

I take my coffee cup, and I walk out, staring down the empty halls. My guess, from experience, is that they’re at church, a bikers’ weekly meeting that no one is allowed to be involved in, except them.

I treed slowly toward Axel’s office, and I peer through the door when I open it. It’s surprisingly neat, for a biker’s office. I walk in, shutting the door quietly behind me. I walk over to his desk, and begin lifting papers and snooping. Don’t judge; I’m a woman, and let’s face it, we’d all think it, and most of us would do it. I open his top drawer, and the first thing I see there is a badge. A policeman’s badge.

I lift the golden, heavy piece into my hand, and stare down at it. I don’t really know a lot about Axel’s family, but maybe his granddad or someone close to him was a cop? It would make sense.

I place the badge down, and I catch a glimpse of my USB right at the back of the drawer. Seriously? He just left it in a drawer. Okay, granted, most of his men would never dare enter this office the way I have...but still.

I lift the device, and stare down at it. This caused so much pain for me, yet it brought me here, and sometimes I wonder if that happened for a reason. I hear the door knob turn, and I spin around, gaping. Axel walks in, and when he sees me, his eyes widen. His mighty arms cross over his chest. “The f*ck are you doin’ in here?”

I could do one of two things in this situation: I could lie and stammer, and rush out of the room, or I could take April’s advice, and I could push Axel, to see if there really is a chance for something between us. Seeing him standing at the door, his dark jeans hanging low on his hips, a tight black singlet stretched across his chest, makes me so damned wet I find myself squirming just looking at him.

I know what I want to do. I lift the USB into the air, and his eyes widen.

“You little...give me that, Meadow. Don’t f*ckin’ start that bullshit with me. I refuse to chase you across the country again.”

I can’t help the smile that creeps across my face. Axel’s eyes narrow with confusion, and I keep my eyes locked on his as I bite my lip, and move my hand around to my back, holding it tight. I see the moment when he catches on, because his eyes sparkle, and then his expression turns hungry. He begins walking toward me, and I walk backward, quickly.

He lunges when he gets around behind the desk, but I quickly dodge him. With a smirk and a growl, he stalks toward me until my back is against the nearest wall. He presses his hard, large body against mine, and I quickly tuck the USB deep down into my panties, placing it right between my butt cheeks. Axel grips my shoulders, and runs his hands down over my shoulders and down my arms, until he reaches my ass.

“You want it, biker? You gotta get it.”

His eyes blaze, and he makes a throaty sound as his hand cups my ass cheeks, and he squeezes, lifting me off the ground before gyrating against me. I can feel the hard, firm denim rubbing against my p-ssy, and I whimper, pressing myself harder against the wall. Axel jerks my ass, and begins rotating me, moving his hips so the friction causes bolts of pleasure to shoot though my body.

“God,” I whisper, dropping my head back.

“You want to be searched for that, Cricket? I’ll f*ckin’ search you.”

He spins my body around quickly, and slams me against the wall, pressing my cheek to the cool wood. His body presses against my ass, and his cock rides between my ass cheeks. I can feel his solid body moving over me, and I want to push myself against him, but the idea of letting him have all this control is doing crazy things to my sex drive.

“Hands above your head,” he directs, taking my hands and lifting them high above my head.

“Now,” he rumbles against my ear. “Spread your legs.”

Biting my lip, I slowly spread my legs. Axel starts with his hands up near mine, and slowly he moves them down over my arms, making my skin break out into tiny goosebumps. When he reaches my shoulders, he squeezes them, before moving his hands around to my breasts. He cups them, and gently massages them, pinching my nipples through my soft, flimsy bra.

“Are you concealing anything in here?” he rasps into my ear.

“No, sir,” I whisper.

He moves his hands down my sides, stopping to slide them over my stomach. He flattens his hand just over my belly button, and uses it to push me gently backwards, so he can take the opportunity to grind his cock against my ass once more. I let off a little squeak of pleasure, before he begins moving his hands down to my panties. He slides his fingers down my legs, until he reaches the hem of my dress. He lifts it up, and then proceeds to hooks his fingers through my panties.

“What about in here?”

“No...sir.” I breathe, closing my eyes.

“You understand I have to check. It’s the law.”

“Yes sir.”

He slips his fingers inside my panties, and runs one right down my damp slit, skimming my * as he ventures lower.

“Spread your legs further,” he orders in a husky tone.

I do as he asks, spreading them until they’re a solid meter apart. He slides his finger down to my entrance, and then slips a finger inside. I cry out, slapping my hand against the wall. He thrusts his finger, and I feel my eyes roll. God, it feels so damned good.

“Are you gaining pleasure out of this?” he chastises.

“No sir,” I croak.

“So you won’t come if I continue this inspection?”

“No sir.”

“If you do, I’m going to spank you, and then I’m going to cuff you.”

I whimper as he thrusts his fingers again. I can feel how wet I am, and I know his fingers will be coated in my arousal. I’m on the edge, biting my lip so hard, trying desperately to stop the warm feeling that’s rushing into my p-ssy. I need to come. Axel reaches his other hand around, and flicks my *, and the flood gates open. I come all around him, whimpering his name and arching into him.

“Bad girl,” he murmurs into my ear.

He slides his fingers from my damp depths, and raises them up, pressing them against my lips.

“Open,” he orders.

I do as he asks, and he slips two fingers into my mouth. His fingers are big, and rough, and they taste like me. I suck on them, wrenching a ragged groan from his lips. He slips them from my lips, and I hear him shift about, then he takes my hands and lowers them, pulling them behind my back.

“I don’t believe you’re not concealing something. We need to continue this search while you’re detained.”

“I don’t have anything,” I protest.

“We’ll see about that.”

He takes me over to his desk, and he pushes my front down. My hands are cuffed behind my back. I feel his boots edge between my legs, and kick my feet apart, so I’m spread-eagled with my ass in the air. My heart picks up. The idea of playing a game like this with him excites me. I feel my throat constrict as I try to smother my moans of pleasure. I feel his hand run down my back, stopping at my ass. He cups it again, his fingers biting into my flesh.

“What about in here?”

Oh God.

No one has ever gone there.

“Answer me, girl,” he orders, his voice hard, rough, and sexy as hell.

“No...no, there’s nothing in there.”

“You ever had someone touch you here?”

I squirm, and he chuckles softly. “A sweet virgin ass. Do you know what I want to do to you now?”

I shake my head, biting my lip. He leans down, putting his lips beside my ear. “I want to f*ck you there. I want to slide my cock deep inside you until you scream my name.”

I gasp, and turn my head, meeting his eyes.

“You want that, Cricket? Do you want me to put my cock in your sweet ass?”

“I do-do-don’t...”

Smack!

His hand comes down over my ass cheek, and I squeal loudly.

“Answer me properly,” he breathes. “Do you want my cock in your ass?”

I shake my head, confused. I don’t know if I want him there. I’ve never had anyone there before, and the idea of having him f*ck me there, kind of scares me.

“Is that a no?”

“That’s a no...for now,” I whisper.

He leans down again, and I can feel his warm breath against my ear. “You scared to say no to me, baby?”

I shake my head quickly.

“I think that’s a lie.”

Smack!

His hand slaps my bottom again. I mewl loudly, and push my ass back into his jeans. I feel his cock graze against me.

“Do I scare you, Cricket?”

“No, Axel,” I say in a small, meek voice.

“Do you trust me?”

“No...Axel.”

He stiffens behind me, and the room falls silent for a moment. I don’t want to lie to him, because the truth is that I don’t entirely trust him. After the things he did to me, I can’t fully believe he won’t do more. If I let go, if I believe that this is all perfect and dandy after one session, then I am an idiot. Axel has problems that run far too deep for a few good sex sessions to cure.

“Well,” he says, his voice barely above a whisper, “you will.”

I make a mmm sound with my lips, and he’s silent a moment. I hear the sound of his belt buckle being undone, and then I hear his zipper. My body tightens in anticipation. I want him to f*ck me like this. Restrained. A captive to him. He slowly removes my panties, and I hear the USB drop onto the floor. He doesn’t move for it, instead he takes hold of the cuffs and pulls them, jerking my body up and into his.

“How do you want this? I’m thinkin’ hard, baby.”

“Ohhh, yes,” I rasp, pushing my ass back into him.

He pushes me back down onto the desk, and then I feel him behind me, his cock pressing against my damp entrance. He takes hold of my hands and pulls them, all while slowly sliding his cock deep inside me. I make a strangled, pleasured sound as he buries himself to the hilt. Then he sits there, not moving, just letting me feel the fullness that is overwhelming my body right now.

“Do you like my dick rings, Cricket?” he growls.

“Y-y-yes,” I moan. “Please, Axel, move...”

He laughs, and it’s a deep, throaty sound. He slides his cock out of my eager depths, and then he plunges back in, quick and nasty. I cry out, throwing my head back and bucking against him. He drives into me like that three or four times, pulling out and plunging back in, then he slows, and begins lazily dragging his cock in and out. Then he stops.

I hiss, and squirm. “Why are you stopping?”

“You wanted both. I’m giving you both.”

“Goddammit, Axel,” I grind out between clenched teeth. “F*ck me, hard, fast, deep...make me come.”

“That’s more like it.”

He pumps his hips, starting off with a slow, but firm rhythm, and then he picks up his pace until his balls are slapping against my ass, and the sounds coming from both of us sound more like animals in heat then two people f*cking. He’s grunting, and every now and then, my name slides from his lips. I’m screaming, and moaning, and squirming. Pleasure is swirling in my core, ready to erupt.

“Come on,” he moans, his voice tight. “Come on, Cricket...”

It takes a few more thrusts, and I’m sent over that blissful edge. I scream his name as my body jerks with rush after rush of intense pleasure. Axel works me until I stop trembling, then he pulls out, repeating the same process as yesterday. He spins me around, lowering me, and then he thrusts his cock into my mouth.

“F*ck, suck it,” he bellows. “Suck my dick.”

God, hearing a man talk so dirty has my entire body warming for him again. I take all of him, swallowing him down, and relishing in the feeling of his cock swelling, before he spurts his release into my mouth. His groans fill the room, and I realize his fingers are tangled painfully in my hair as he uses my head to drive his thrusts. When he’s done, he slowly pulls out, and stares down at me, his eyes wild.

“You look so f*ckin’ perfect down there, on your knees, lookin’ up at me with those innocent-as-f*ck eyes.”

“I’m not innocent, Axel,” I mumble, not taking my eyes from his.

“You are, Cricket. If you f*cked me the way I need to be f*cked, it’d break you.”

I shake my head. “You don’t know what would break me. Not even I know that.”

He shakes his head, and pulls his jeans up, before leaning down and taking my arms, pulling me up. He turns me around, and uncuffs me. While his chest is pressed against my back, I think about how our sex continues to end...without him coming inside me. He has to come with his cock in my mouth, and curiosity has me blurting out, “Why don’t you come in me, Axel?”

He stops moving behind me, and he’s silent for a long moment.

“Because, Cricket, that’s the kind of f*cked up I am. I have never, nor will I ever, come inside a woman. I don’t trust them enough. I refuse to give them that part of me.”

He thinks coming inside me is a weakness.

My heart hurts just that much more for him.

~*~*~*~

AXEL

I stare down at her, sleeping, her brown hair fanning out against the pillow as she breathes softly. I lift my hand, and run my fingers through my hair, feeling like a weight is sitting heavily on my chest. I shouldn’t be doing this. I’m playing with fire. A girl like her, she doesn’t deserve scum like me. She deserves only the best, but I’m letting her get in, and that shouldn’t be happening.

This isn’t how this is meant to go down.

She’ll never understand what kind of shit runs through my head. She’ll never understand that the reason I don’t come in her sweet depths is because I can’t. Me showing that kind of weakness isn’t something I’ve ever wanted to let myself do. I’ve never wanted to give a woman a moment where she sees I’ve lost my control. The only way I can find release is in her mouth. Seeing her kneel before me, it gives me a feeling of dominance, like I’m not weak, like I’m not completely f*cked up.


I turn and walk from the room. I head back to my office, and slam the door behind me when I get in. I slump down in the chair, and stare at the desk. There’s paper everywhere, because I bent her over it, and f*cked her...hard. Damned hard. She liked it. She’s got a dark side, and I don’t want to delve into it, because then I’ll let myself believe that maybe something can happen between us.

But it can’t.

It won’t.

“Yo, Pres,” Cobra says, walking into the room. “How’s things?”

I lift my eyes, and give him an intense expression. “F*ckin’ great.”

“Yeah, somehow I think you’re pullin’ my chain, boss. What’s goin’ on?”

“Nothin’,” I grunt.

“Has it got something to do with how hard you just f*cked Meadow in here?”

I snap my head up, and shoot daggers at him. “What the f*ck did you say?”

“No offense meant, boss, but the entire club heard her screamin’ your name.”

F*ck.

Shit.

I put my head in my hands, and growl loudly. “This is f*cked up.”

“You two...a thing now?”

I jerk at his words, and begin shaking my head. “F*ck. No. I can’t be...we can’t be. Shit, I’ve gotten myself in deep, man, f*ckin’ deep.”

“You care about her, boss?”

I can’t answer that, because the answer is pointless. It makes no difference to how this has to end. Caring, or not caring, either way she has to go. She can’t be here in all this f*cked-up bullshit. It’s not where a girl like her is meant to be. She’s spent her life around lies, and she doesn’t even know it. She lost her mom at an early age, and she lost her dad pretty soon after. She’s been running since then, trying to protect something she doesn’t even fully understand.

Hell, I bet the girl has never even been to a party.

And that shit is partly my fault. I can’t keep holding her back. As soon as Beast has been dealt with, I’m letting her go. Hell, if there was a way I could let her go sooner, I would...

I stare down at my hands. There is one person who could take care of her until all this is sorted, but I don’t know if she’s willing to do it. I look up just as the door opens, and Colt comes in. I meet his gaze.

“Colt, I got somethin’ for you to do.”

He narrows his eyes, and crosses his big arms across his chest. “What’s that? If it’s got somethin’ to do with hurtin’ Meadow, you can forget it.”

“Stop your bullshit, and listen to me. I need you to go into my office, and get my phone, scroll through until you find a number with the title Lady Matilda. Get it, dial it, tell her I’m bringing someone to see her tonight.”

Colt raises his brows. “Lady Matilda?”

“Yeah,” I grunt, turning and meeting Cobra’s confused expression. “Lady Matilda.”

~*~*~*~

MEADOW

My entire body is on fire. Everything I touch is sensitive. My lips are swollen, my breasts are full and achy, and my p-ssy is still damp from having Axel deep inside me. I feel my body shiver as I step underneath the shower, feeling the cool water wash down over my overheated body. If you asked me what the hell just went down in there, I’d tell you I have no idea, but it was f*cking hot.

So damned hot.

I fill my palm with soap, rubbing my hands together before pressing my palms over my breasts, lathering them up. I keep thinking about Axel and why he won’t allow himself to show that kind of pleasure to a woman. It’s like he’s keeping it so alpha, so male. Maybe he’s afraid of getting one pregnant, and not being in the right place to deal with it—not that he even asked to use a condom. Thinking of that has my heart picking up a few paces. I hope he’s clean...I mean...what if he’s not?

God, what the hell was I thinking, just letting him screw me like that?

I push the thought from my mind, adding it to the many things I have to ask him while I’m here. I close my eyes, lathering my hair up, and I am taken back to the feeling of having his hands on me, his cock deep inside me, his lips on mine. My p-ssy clenches, and I find myself sliding my fingers down and over my sensitive nipples. A small moan escapes my lips as I pinch the hard buds, and then slip my fingers down lower, gently spreading my folds.

“If you’re gonna put your fingers inside that sweet p-ssy, I’m watching, darlin’.”

I jerk my head up, and see Axel standing at the bathroom door, wearing only a pair of faded black jeans. I move my fingers from my throbbing sex, and turn my eyes away quickly. “I was just...ah...washing...”

“That was some pretty f*ckin’ seductive washing. If you wash yourself like that every night, I’m not gettin’ out of this shower.”

I flush, and press my arm over my chest, hiding the fact that my nipples went from hard to so stiff they ache. A grin appears on his devastating face, and I want nothing more than to go over and wrap my arms around his neck, kissing him until we both can’t breathe. But Axel doesn’t just kiss. He doesn’t peck. He doesn’t hug. He f*cks, and he f*cks good, but that’s where the connection lies. There is no affection.

My heart aches at that realization.

“Get outta there, and come and eat with me. We gotta talk, Cricket.”

I feel my body tense, just slightly. Something is lying in his gaze, something like...sadness? No, Axel Wraithe doesn’t get sad, so what could it be? Has something happened? Did they catch Beast? Am I able to go home? Do I even want to go home? My heart, which was before only filling my body with a dull ache, is now thudding.

I don’t know if I can walk away.

“O-o-okay,” I whisper.

His eyes search my face before he turns and walks out, leaving me standing there, confused. I quickly get out of the shower and dry myself, before throwing on a pair of shorts and a tank.

Then I walk out into his room. Axel is sitting at the office desk in the corner, and when I walk in, he looks up at me. He’s got two sandwiches, and he slides one toward me. I take a seat next to him, and stare down at the food with no interest.

“So,” he begins, his voice not giving away any emotion, “you know I got shit to deal with, and I can’t keep my club on lockdown. I need to get out, and I need to finish this with Beast. I can’t have you here while that shit goes down. It’s club business, and it ain’t safe for you here. I can’t just let you go home, either, because you’re in too much danger. Until I’ve sorted this, I’m sending you to stay with a very good friend of mine.”

“What?” I say meekly, shaking my head. “I don’t want to go and stay with someone I don’t know, Axel.”

His expression hardens just slightly, enough to push his authority. “You’re not getting a choice, Cricket.”

I skid my chair back, still shaking my head. “You can’t choose how I live my life, Axel. I don’t even have to be here. If you’re done with me, then just send me home, but I’m not going to stay with someone I don’t know. I do get a choice, because it’s MY life. So if we’re finished whatever the f*ck it is we’re doing here, I’ll be on my way.”

Axel is out of his chair before I can take one step toward the door. His fingers curl around my arm, and he spins me around. I stop, nearly nose to nose with him, and his eyes are telling me he’s not happy with me deciding how this is going to go. Well, f*ck him, he can’t choose what I do with my life. If he wants to chase that no-good son-of-a-bitch across the countryside, that’s up to him.

“Whatever the f*ck we’re doin’ here,” he breathes, “ain’t done yet. And you’ll do as you’re told, because you’re the one who made a choice to run with information that was never for you.”

“To be clear, Axel, it was never for you, either. It was for Raide, and because of you I never got to get it to...”

“Raide is dead, Cricket,” Axel snarls, cutting me off. “There is no Raide.”

“What?” I squeak, perplexed.

“He’s dead. Beast killed him. I’m the best option you have right now, because while that man is alive, you’re not safe. If you’re goin’ to run again, and give me hell, then give me some warning, yeah? So I can make sure to give Lady Matilda a good set of chains.”

“I hate you,” I whisper, in a pained, broken voice.

“No darlin’,” he murmurs, taking the back of my head in his large hand, and pulling me close. “You just hate that you can’t walk away.”

“You’re wrong,” I breathe. “I could walk away. You’re just not giving me the chance.”

His body flinches at my words, and he lets me go, stepping back. His stony expression returns, and he crosses his arms. “No, you’re right, I’m not. I won’t have your death on my hands. I don’t need any more shit in my life. So you’re goin’, whether you like it or not. We clear?”

“Crystal,” I spit.

“Good. Pack your things, we leave in an hour.”

With that, he turns and walks out of the room. And I push the burning sensation forming under my eyelids back.

If this is what he wants...so be it.