Born to Ride_A Clubhouse Collection

chapter 9

MEADOW

Your words won’t break me, for you will never take me.

I hear the door creak, and I snap my head up. I blink rapidly, trying to get the sleep blur from my vision. I see Colt step in, and his eyes dart around the room before falling on me. He gives me a sympathetic smile, and slowly walks in, stopping at the end of the bed.

My arm is aching from being cuffed upright, and I want so desperately to move it. I need to stretch.

“Hey, Meadow,” he says, leaning his hip against the post.

“Colt,” I mutter in an angry tone.

He sighs, and sits on the bed, staring over at me, his eyes pleading to understand. “He’s my boss, I had to do it. If he found out I’d employed you and didn’t tell him, he would have killed me. You don’t know what Axel is like.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Colt,” I growl, my voice seething out through clenched teeth. “I do know what Axel is like.”

“Then you understand that...”

I cut him off by sticking my free hand up. “I don’t need your apologies, and need for my forgiveness. In the end, I’m here, and there’s nothing I can do about that.”

“I’ve tried to talk to him,” he says, giving a weak smile. “He won’t f*ckin’ budge.”

“He wants something I have, and until I give it to him, he won’t let me go.”

His eyes harden a little, and he mutters, “Then give him what he wants...”

“It’s not that easy,” I say, staring at my lap and the one free hand that’s moving in tiny circles over my thigh.

“Why?”

I snap my eyes up, and stiffen. “Why is none of your business.”

He sighs angrily, and his eyes narrow. “Is there really any need to be like this? F*ck, Meadow, I said I was sorry.”

“I thought I’d finally found a friend, Colt,” I say, hearing the pitiful cracking in my own voice.

He shuffles closer. “You did, but...this club is all I have. Axel comes first. When all this is sorted, we can be friends again. I like you Meadow, and I don’t wanna see any harm come to you.”

I turn my eyes away because they’re welling with tears, and I want no one to see any weakness from me. “Just leave, Colt,” I whisper.

He’s silent a moment, and then he slides a power bar toward me. “He doesn’t know I gave you this. Give him what he wants Meadow, and free yourself.”

Then he gets up and walks out, shutting the door quietly. I blink rapidly, trying to remove the tears so stubbornly welling under my eyelids. I hate that I’m crying. I’ve been through so much, and I didn’t cry, but now I’m breaking, slowly falling to pieces. I pick up the power bar, and my heart swells with gratitude. It overpowers the anger I hold toward Colt.

I unwrap the packet, and I take a bite.

Who knows when I’ll get fed again.

~*~*~*~

AXEL

“Where are they?” I bark, slamming my drink down onto the countertop in the bar.

Cobra shrugs, and Jax gives me a skeptical look. “No idea, but they’re around.”

“They know we’ve got her, and they’re goin’ to try and find a way to make sure they get their hands on her before the USB is given.”

Cobra turns, staring at me with an intense expression. “Then we need to get that information from her.”

“I don’t f*ckin’ know how to get it from her. She’s more goddamned stubborn than anyone I’ve ever met.”

“Is there anyone close to her? Someone we can use against her?” Jax asks, lighting a joint and inhaling for a long, dragging moment.

“No, her parents are dead, she has no siblings.”

Cobra scratches his chin. “There’s gotta be something that’ll break her.”

And just like that, it hits me.

F*ck.

It’s me.

I’ve been living in some stupid fantasy where I thought I could break her with my cruel acts, but all along, she’s been hanging on to the one thing that she needs before she’ll hand that information over. She’s holding hope that there’s something inside me she can save. She’s hoping that there’s some way she can understand what happened. So, the answer is simple, really.

I have to break her. I have to be the one to send her over the edge.

I have to install a fear so great in her that she can’t turn me away.

I have to show her how cold I really am.

~*~*~*~

MEADOW

I’m starving.

There’s just nothing I can focus on right now, I’m so hungry. All I want and need is food. I haven’t eaten since Colt gave me a power bar this morning, and I’m beginning to feel the affects of not being fed. My body is weak, my head is pounding, and I’m utterly exhausted, even though I haven’t moved. My eyes are heavy, and I feel lethargic. My nose is throbbing, and nothing I do will take the pain away.

This can’t go on.

“Decided to change your mind yet?”

I hear Axel’s voice, and I lift my head to see him standing in the doorway. He’s got a cigarette in his hand, and an empty look on his face.

“No,” I croak.

“I will win this battle, Meadow.”

I blink, trying to stop my eyes from burning. “I need food, Axel. Please.”

He stares down at me, as if he didn’t hear me.

“Did you hear me?” I hiss. “I need food.”

He crosses his arms, looking at me expectantly. He wants me to give him something in return. The USB. Anger swells in my chest, and desperation takes over. I yank the chains, and I begin screaming as loudly as I can muster. “Just give me some food, goddamn you, just give me some f*cking food!”

I thrash my head from side to side, squirming in my chains. Axel is beside me in a split second, clutching my arms tightly. “Enough,” he warns.

I don’t stop.

I kick out at him, and my foot connects with his thigh, hard. He groans and drops to his knees, and I lash out again, hitting him right in the face. I hear the sound of his nose popping, and his roar of pain as blood spurts out and runs down his face. It’s still swollen and tender from when I hit it a week ago. I guess now he most certainly knows how it feels. He launches himself off the floor just as my foot lashes out again, and he tangles his hands into my hair, yanking me close to him.

“So help me God, if you ever f*ckin’ kick me again I’ll make you pay in the worst possible way you can imagine. You think of your worst nightmare, and I’ll make that look mild.”

“I hate you,” I spit. “I cared about you. Once, you were everything to me. I adored you. I trusted you. How can you do this to me?”

I’m hysterical, and I know I’ll regret this outburst tomorrow, but right now there’s nothing I can do to stop it. I just can’t. He needs to know what he’s doing to me. He needs to know he’s ruining me. He’s destroying everything I’ve fought so hard to create. He’s breaking me. Slowly, but surely, he’s tearing me to pieces.

“You’re nothing to me,” he thunders, and I feel the warm drops of his blood drip onto my cheek. “Nothing!”

That hurts. It hurts more than I’m willing to admit. Letting me go, he takes two steps back, and I look up at the monster that was once someone I loved. He’s got blood pouring down his face, and his eyes are red and glassy with rage and emotion. His fists are clenched so tightly they’re going white. I can see his hate, and it’s a hate I don’t understand. My father might have hurt him, but I didn’t...I was just an innocent child who adored someone that came into her life.

“Why me?” I croak, slumping down. “I didn’t do anything to you, Axel. In all this, I was the one constant in your life, the one person who didn’t let you down.”

“You’re wrong,” he growls. “You did let me down.”

I shake my head, feeling a tear slide down my cheek. “How?”

He turns without answering me, and he walks to the door. When he gets to it, he looks back at me, and in a broken, angry voice, he growls, “You stopped trusting me, and you made me the enemy.”