“My daughter,” she says. “Look, I’ve been in… compromising positions before, Dean. I’m sure Liv has too. If you just—”
I hang up on her before my fury unleashes. My hand shakes as I try Liv’s cell again. I could give a shit what Crystal Winter thinks of me. But if she knows what happened to Liv at Fieldbrook, if she uses it against her— I throw the phone on the bed.
The arrows are flying at my wife from all directions. And I’m five thousand goddamned miles away.
I want to be back with Liv right now. I need to be. The urge to shield her from this shitstorm is visceral, instinctive. It’s the only thing I can do.
Shoving aside my anger, I sit down and try to work for the next hour. I stare at a photo of Liv above my desk, one of the more modest pictures of her I’d taken at the Butterfly House.
I told her once that I’d move heaven and earth to give her whatever she wanted. I still would. I’ll fight forever to give her all the things she never had as a child—love, safety, happiness, protection—but now there’s something else, a desperate urge to give her a marriage filled with more, to give her things she didn’t even know she wanted.
To give her a life beyond what either of us has ever expected.
Need boils inside me. I fumble for my phone again and push the speed dial button.
“Dean?” Liv’s voice, breathless. “What time is it there?”
“Uh… eleven, I think. Where are you?”
“At home.”
“Is your mother there?”
“No, she’s out looking for another place to stay. She’ll be gone before you get back.”
“She wants you to leave with her, get on the road again.”
“I’ll never go anywhere with her, Dean, you know that.”
“When did she find out about Sterling and Fox?”
Her breath catches. “Yesterday, but how did you—”
“She answered the phone when I called earlier.”
“I’m sorry. I was at the grocery store.”
“Why didn’t you tell me she knows about the goddamned charge?”
“I didn’t know she’d figured it out until this morning. What did she say to you, Dean?”
Liv will have to deal with being married to a man whose reputation is ruined…
My throat tightens. I can’t push any words past it.
“Are you okay?” Liv asks.
No, I’m not okay. I’m not okay five thousand miles away from my wife. I’m not okay with my career and reputation hanging in the balance. I’m not okay with being powerless.
“Dean?”
“I need to be with you. I need to do something.”
“I know you do.”
“Liv.”
“I’m here.”
“Tell me you know this is all bullshit. That Maggie Hamilton is lying.”
“Of course she’s lying.”
“You never thought it could be true?”
“What?”
“Not once did you wonder if it was possible?” My heart is suddenly pounding hard. “That I could have hit on a student?”
“No, of course not. Why would you ask me such a thing?”
“I’ve lied to you before.”
“Oh, Dean, don’t.”
“How can you just trust that I’m telling you the fucking truth?”
“Because I know you, you ass! You’re the man who looked up the university rules before you asked me out.”
“Years ago.”
“So, what, you think I’m suddenly going to doubt you now? After all we’ve been through?”
“It’s happened before.” I can’t stop, have to get it out. “Other female students, professors… some of them have come on to me over the years.”
“I know.”
“You know?”
“Of course! You’re so handsome, successful, intelligent, so… you. Women have always fallen over themselves for you, and I’m not so na?ve to think they don’t still flirt with you.”
“I’ve never—”
“Dean.” Her voice sharpens. “You don’t even have to say it.”
“Why do you just believe me?”
“Because I know you. I’m your girl, dammit.”
Of course she is. That’s an unbreakable, rock-solid truth.
“Dean, please. My mother has been trying in her insidious little way to convince me that there are cracks in our marriage, but—”
“What the fuck? What has she said to you?”
“Nothing that means anything. Nothing I believe. But this is why I knew you had to leave again. I need you to understand that I meant it when I said I could handle my mother alone. Just like I can handle talking to Ben Stafford. I know the truth. So don’t you dare lose your faith in me or in us.”
“I never will, but I can’t stand this.” My chest feels like stone. “I know what you’ve been telling me. I can’t protect you from everything. I get it. But goddammit, Liv, I’m not supposed to be the one hurting you again.”
“You’re not! The only thing hurting me is that we have to be apart.”
“Then I’m coming home.”
“Dean, you—”
“I talked to Simon this morning about figuring out a way I can do the work from home. Maybe with one or two short trips to Altopascio. I’ll make it work. I can’t stay away from you until the end of July. I won’t.”