“Honestly,” Liz said, “my biggest concern is for Rosie. She sold her house when she moved into the lodge to pay off the last of the mortgage on the barbershop building, and Katie’s apartment isn’t big enough for both of them.”
Ryan cleared his throat. “Lauren and I talked about it and if we accept this offer, she’ll take her house off the market and I’ll pay it off so Rosie can live there rent-free.”
“That’s very generous,” Mitch said. “But I think we should subtract the payoff on Lauren’s house from the profit on the lodge before we split up the money.”
“I agree,” Liz said, and Sean added his agreement.
They had it all figured out, Josh thought. They’d all spent days dwelling on the situation and they’d found a way to make it work. For him.
He suddenly realized he was cold. Not like a chill from a draft, but a cold that seemed to come straight from his bones. They were all willing to sacrifice the Northern Star to make him happy, but none of them wanted to. He could see it in their eyes and hear it in Liz’s voice.
His family would be hurt. Whitford would lose the ATV access to town before they’d even gotten to reap some benefits from the work they’d put in so far. People like Dave Carmody and his boy would have to find a new place and start new traditions. And then there was Rose. Even though the offer of Lauren’s house was there, it wouldn’t be her home. He tried not to think about Katie, but she was in his head, too.
“So what’s it going to be?” Ryan said, his tone letting everybody know he wanted this conversation to be over.
One by one, starting with Mitch and going down by age as if it had been planned that way, they all agreed to the sale until it came down to what should have been Josh’s vote.
“I guess it’s unanimous, then,” Mitch said, probably assuming he was a yes vote, and the silence that followed was a boulder crushing the air from Josh’s lungs.
It was right there—everything he wanted. He’d have freedom from the lodge and enough money from his share of the sale to figure out what he wanted to do and where he wanted to do it.
“Wait.” Everybody turned to him, but he couldn’t seem to squeeze any more words out.
“Don’t do this to yourself, kid,” Sean said after a long silence. “It’s a big deal, so it hits home a little, but we told you we’re one hundred percent behind you. We mean that.”
“It’s okay, Josh.” Liz’s voice sounded small over the speakers, but he could hear the tremor.
“I can’t.” Even as he got the words out, he knew they were the truth. He couldn’t sell the Northern Star.
“This is an excellent offer and not one we’re likely to see again anytime soon,” Mitch said in a tone that was all business. “This season’s going well, but we’re not in a place yet to offer an outside manager financial security, so hiring a manager’s not an option yet. You want out and this is the best opportunity.”
“I wanted a choice.” Josh dropped his head into his hands and rubbed his temples. “I just wanted a goddamn choice.”
“Nothing’s changed for the rest of us,” Ryan said. “We can’t run the lodge, so either you’re in or we’re all out.”
“I can’t do it.” He stood abruptly, barely noticing that his chair fell over. “We’re not selling. Sorry you all had to drive up here for nothing.”
He walked out the back door, his chest so tight he felt as if he couldn’t breathe, even though evidence to the contrary hovered in front of his face in frosty clouds. For the first time in his life he’d been given a choice. And he’d made it.
Picking up a chunk of wood, he hurled it as hard as he could at the barn.
*
Katie heard the footsteps coming up the stairs to her apartment and knew it had to be Josh. The door at the street locked automatically, requiring most people to be buzzed in. There was a spare key to all the barbershop building’s doors, hanging at the lodge, but the footsteps sounded too heavy to be her mom’s.
Suddenly, she didn’t want to answer the door—didn’t want the answer to the question that had been hanging over her head since yesterday—but she figured if he used his key on the street door, he wouldn’t hesitate to use his key to the apartment if she didn’t let him in. He had to be coming to tell her in person he was leaving town. Anything less and he probably would have called.
Since there was no avoiding the conversation, she opened the door just as he lifted his hand to knock, and she stepped back to let him in. He looked beat, both physically and emotionally. And he didn’t kiss her as he walked past.
“Sorry I didn’t call first,” he said.
“No problem. You want a beer?”
“No, I’m good.” He sat on her couch and flopped back against the cushion. He looked like a man who needed a hug, but he’d gone out of his way to put distance between them and she was having a hard time crossing it. “Did Rosie tell you we had an offer on the lodge?”
“Yeah, she mentioned it, assuming you had told me”