Living full-time with Liam, Aiden, and Allison has been a blast. The four of us get along well and we all usually ended up staying at their condo anyway. It’s actually easier with not running back and forth to the dorm to get more clothes. Just a few more weeks until the three of them leave for Charlotte. The guys’ agent is looking for a condo for them to share. They told him to look for a three bedroom so that I can have my own room when I come to visit. I try not to think about it. I’m just trying to enjoy each day as it comes. Once their lives with the NFL start, things are going to change.
Allison and I are currently packing for the beach house. We plan to spend at least two weeks there; which includes being there for my birthday. Aiden’s parents and mine are going on a two -week cruise to Europe! I love how our families mingle so well together. I know my brother is thrilled, as is Allison, at this new friendship our parents seem to have.
“Make sure you pack that blue bikini we bought last week. It looks great with your eyes,” Allison tells me.
“Oh, it’s already packed and ready to go. I’m hoping it brings me luck with the fellas,” I say with a wink.
Allison collapses on the bed in a fit of giggles and I follow her down. That’s how Liam and Aiden find us a few minutes later. Apparently, our laugher led them to us.
“What’s so funny, baby?” Liam asks Allison. He’s watching her like she’s a giant steak he wants to devour.
Allison looks at me and we lose ourselves in laughter once again. “I have to pee,” she says jumping up and running to the bathroom, continuing to laugh hysterically.
Liam raises his eyebrow at me in question. I shrug my shoulders and try to compose myself. Allison returns a few minutes later, still smiling. She heads back towards the bed, but Liam cuts her off and pulls her into a hug. “Spill it, missy, or you’ll be sorry,” he tells her.
Allison bites her lip, trying not to laugh. “It was nothing. More of a ‘you had to be there moment’,” she tells him.
Unfortunately, that’s not the answer he wanted to hear. He begins to tickle her, and she once again erupts with laughter, trying to fight him off.
“H-Ha-Hales, help me,” she laughs.
I make my way to Liam, to attempt to help her in her efforts to be free. I plan to jump on his back and attack. Just as I’m about to pounce, I feel strong arms wrap around my waist from behind.
“Thanks, man,” Liam says through his laughter.
I wiggle, trying to free myself from Aiden’s iron grip, but it has the opposite effect. He tightens his hold on me. Leaning down, he whispers in my ear, “Don’t fight me, angel, or you’re next.”
Hell with that! I continue to wiggle, and he pulls me so tight that I can feel him, all of him, against my back. I stop and remain still. Liam and Allison are in their own little world. This is risky to be this close to him like this. Feeling all of him. I again try not to think too much of it. He’s a guy pressed up against a wiggling girl in short shorts and a tank top. What man wouldn’t respond to that, right?
I feel his breath hot on my ear. Did he just growl? “Yes, angel, you did that. Now stay still so I can get myself under control before your brother kicks my ass,” he roughly whispers.
I remain still like a statue. Aiden eases his hold on me, but doesn’t let go.
I feel the thunderous beat of my heart, and Aiden. The heat of his body pressed against mine. It takes everything in me not to turn in his arms and press my lips to his. I want to wrap my arms around his neck and run my hands through his hair. I want every part of me forged with every part of him.
I Want Him.
I hear Allison squeal, and I’m brought out of my Aiden induced fog. I place my hands over his and pull them away from my hips. I step away from him before it’s too late. Before Liam catches on and kills us both. I try to quell the excitement that I did that to him. For a brief moment in time, Aiden Emerson wanted me.
My chest is rising rapidly. I’m trying to pull oxygen back into my lungs. He makes me breathless. He always has. Although I know I shouldn’t, I lift my head and chance a look at Aiden. He’s staring right at me with a look that can only be described as lust. He continues to watch me, study me with those gorgeous brown eyes of his. I want to look away, but I can’t force myself to do it. He looks as though he could devour me, and I don’t want to miss a single f*cking minute of it.
All too soon, our trance is broken when Allison frees herself from Liam, jumps off the bed, and runs to hide behind Aiden. He throws his head back and laughs at her. “Don’t get me caught in the cross fire. You brought this all on yourself,” he tells her, trying to step away to make room for Liam who is striding toward her with a wicked gleam in his eye.
He reaches around Aiden, grabs her arm, pulls her next to him, and kisses her senseless. My face heats with embarrassment. I turn my head and try to hide it. I’ve never been embarrassed by their many displays of affection. This time, it’s different. This time, my awareness of Aiden and what just passed between us is still running through my mind. The thunderous beat of my heart and the ache deep in my gut is still pulsing with need. Need for Aiden, and to be in his arms. So yeah, I’m thinking of wrapping myself around him like a damn monkey, hence the embarrassment. Thank God, they can’t read my mind!
Aiden places his hand on Liam’s shoulder. “Dude, let her go. If they don’t finish packing, we’re never getting out of here. The beach is waiting for us.” He laughs, and I’m sure it’s because Liam just growled at him while still kissing Allison.
Needing the distraction, I grab ahold of Allison’s hand and start pulling her away from my brother. “Chop, chop, missy! We have packing to do,” I tell her.
Liam releases her, and we both quickly move to the other side of the room, laughing as we go. I am sure Allison thinks I am being a good friend and protecting her from Liam’s lips. Nope, I need distance from Aiden. These next two weeks with just the four of us at the beach house is going to be a huge test of my will power. Just friends, Hailey. You and Aiden are just friends. I wonder how many times I will have to repeat it so that my heart gets the memo.
“You need any help, baby?” Liam asks Allison.
“No, now go away so we can finish.” She pretends to be stern and upset; however, I can still see the hint of a smile.
“Awesome,” Aiden says. “Let’s finish packing up the truck; then all we will have left is to add their bags.” He is already headed out of the bedroom door as he says it.
Looks as though I might not be the only one needing some distance. Doesn’t really matter though, this day will be forever engrained in my memory. All of my moments with Aiden are.
I make the excuse of packing the truck and flee. Fleeing is really my best option. Option two was to haul Hailey over my shoulder like a f*cking caveman and carry her to my room.
F*ck!
Now I have that image in my head.
Liam follows me outside. I wish he wouldn’t. I just need a minute to calm the f*ck down. I need time to compose myself; otherwise, I might end up blurting out how much I want her. Hailey, his little sister. I can still feel her tight little ass pressed against me. Yeah, this is so not helping me calm down.
“This is the last of it, other than the girls’ bags. They each have two more, so they say.” Liam rolls his eyes.
“Don’t let Allie see you do that,” I say, trying to get him worked up.
Liam wags his eyebrows at me. “I can make it better, trust me,” he says with a smirk.
“Dude, my sister, remember?” I groan.
Liam just laughs and places the cooler in the back of his Pathfinder. I try to make it look like I’m searching for something in my bag to avoid making any more conversation. Right now, my mind is showing a Hailey reel, and Liam is not invited. I just want to savor the memory for a little bit longer. My wish is not granted as I hear the girls walking down the driveway.
“All set, beautiful girl?” Liam asks Allison.
“Yep, this is the last of it. Ace, you wanna sit up front with Liam?” she asks me.
Liam jumps in before I can even open my mouth. “Baby, I want you up front with me,” he tells her, nuzzling her neck.
“Go ahead, Ash. I don’t want to deal with his grumpy ass the entire way,” I say, laughing.
She smiles at me, climbing into the front seat. I climb in the back and slide in next to Hailey. Liam being obsessed with having Allison as close as possible at all times is really starting to work out for me. Even though its torture, I want nothing more than to be next to Hailey the entire drive.
Allison starts us off on the alphabet game; well, at least that’s what we call it. You start at the beginning of the alphabet and say a word that begins with that letter. The next person says your letter and word plus theirs, which is the next letter in the alphabet. At first it’s easy, but as the game goes on, it gets harder to remember everyone’s words. Allison always kicks ass at this game, which is why she is always the one to start it. We are able to make it to the letter M before Liam messes up, which kicks him out of the game. I’m out next at the letter Q. The girls decide it’s not fun just the two of them, and we move on to name that tune, again our version. We are all music lovers, but Hales really likes this game. She always wins. We turn down the radio and each take turns playing a small clip of a song, while the rest of us guess the artist of the song. Liam is at a disadvantage. Driving, he only gets to guess. Allison refuses to let him participate and get distracted behind the wheel. Smart girl that one. She also lost both of her parents in a car accident. She takes that shit seriously, as she should. We all should. We all do.
Hailey starts us off. That girl always pulls deep into the archives. She makes us work for it. We all love music, but Hales is an ‘I love all genres, and I can kick your ass in name that tune’ kind of music lover. She thrives on stumping us. Just something else I love about her. We usually know the song and can even sing along most of the time; however, in this game you have to name the artist.
She starts to play her chosen song, and I immediately recognize it as “Your Love.” “The Outfield,” I blurt out. Hales looks at me and smiles.
“Why, Aiden, have you been brushing up on your artist recognition?” she asks in shock.
“You love that song,” I tell her with a wink. This seems to shock her even more than me actually knowing who sings it. She opens and closes her mouth a couple times. She settles on closed as Allie declares that it’s her turn. I know so much about her. I know she loves the beach. I know that when she loves something, it’s with everything inside of her. I know she loves photography and the pictures she takes are amazing. I know I want her to be mine, and I can’t have her.
Allison plays the clip of her song and we all laugh as we hear “Rock and Roll” by Avril Lavigne blare from her phone. Before we can get the name out, both Allison and Hailey are singing their favorite line of the song at the top of their lungs…
“I am the motherf*cking princess,” they both sing as loud as they can. Rocking out and shaking the Pathfinder.
Liam and I burst out laughing, both shaking our heads. They love this song and that line particularly. These girls are crazy, but we wouldn’t change them for the world. God, I’m gonna miss this girl. She has become such a huge part of my life. Not seeing her every day, well…it just might kill me.
The remainder of the drive is much of the same. The girls give us a live rolling karaoke show while Liam and I laugh at their antics. I watch as Liam always has to be touching Allison. His hand on her leg, his fingers laced with hers, kissing the back of her hand. For all the shit I give him about being whipped, I’m also envious.
Liam pulls into the local grocery store, and we all climb out and stretch our legs. The girls head inside to stock up on supplies while Liam and I hang out by the car.
“Hey, man. Can I ask you a favor?” Liam asks with a serious expression on his face.
“Anything,” I reply, because really, he didn’t need to ask that. He knows I have his back.
“Earlier today, I heard what the girls were talking about before my tickle fest with Allie,” he tells me.
I’m intrigued. He looks concerned.
“I overheard them talking about some skimpy bikini and Hales hooking up with some dude,” he says as if he’s pained that the words even cross his lips.
I tighten my fists at my sides. Just thinking about her with anyone else…it pisses me the f*ck off. “What exactly do you need me to do?” I ask, hoping my voice doesn’t reveal the anger I feel coursing through me.
“I don’t know, man.” Liam runs his hands across his face. “Distract her, maybe? Look, I know she’s gonna meet someone, and I'm going to have to deal with it, but not like this. I don’t want her first time to be some two week fling in the summer. She deserves better than that. I just want her safe.”
She’s still a virgin! I had my suspicions, but it isn’t my place to ask those kinds of questions. “I can’t stop her from hooking up,” I tell him through gritted teeth. I could, oh hell yes, I could. But that would be wrong. Hales isn’t mine. No matter how much I want her, I have no right to keep her from finding someone else. I chose to not act on these feelings I have for her to make sure she would always be a part of my life. Now I need to man up and accept that she’ll be with someone else, and by the sound of it, a hell of a lot sooner than I was prepared to see.
Liam loudly exhales. “I know you can’t stop her, but try and distract her. I know I tend to lose myself in Allie, and I’ll try to not let that happen, but if you can just hang out with her, you know? Don’t give her the chance to go searching for someone. Maybe we can at least protect her from a fling for her first time,” his voice is desperate. I see it eating him up inside at the thought.
If he only knew what his words were doing to me. The anger coursing through my veins at the thought of my Hailey with someone else, someone who doesn’t love and respect her. Yeah, I’m pissed all right.
I hear the girls laughing as they push their loaded down cart out of the store. Liam and I rush to them and take over, loading everything in the Pathfinder. I return the cart to the corral and slide in next to Hailey. I am sitting a little closer to the middle than I should, but I suddenly need to feel close to her. I need to get the image of her and some no-name douche bag out of my head. I swear, if anyone tries to hurt her… I shake my head, trying to clear my thoughts and calm down.
Aiden seems to be acting off. I can’t really put my finger on it. I don’t know what could have happened while Allie and I were in the store, but I can feel the tension coming off him in waves. He slides in, sitting a little closer than he normally does. I inch closer to him and rest my hand on his leg.
“Hey, you all right?” I whisper softly.
His stares at my hand on his leg, I start to pull away, but he places his on top of mine. He gently strokes his thumb across my knuckles. He leans down in the seat so our shoulders are touching, never taking his eyes off our hands. He releases a heavy breath. “Yeah, I’m good, angel,” he whispers back.
I melt. Every damn time he calls me angel, I melt. I don’t try to make conversation. I don’t really want to say anything that I might regret, or that Allison and Liam can overhear. I adjust my position, rest my head on his shoulder, and close my eyes. I want to climb in his lap and demand he tell me what’s wrong, but I can’t. So instead, I touch him as much as I can get away with. We have a good thirty minutes until we reach the beach house, so I’ll pretend to be napping until then. I feel his head rest against mine as he whispers, “Rest, angel.”
My plan of pretending to sleep? Well, I did actually fall asleep. It was worth it though, because of how I am woken up. I hear Aiden whisper, “Wake up, angel. We’re here.” I open my eyes and see that he is close, so close. He lifts his hand and cups my cheek. “Sorry to wake you, baby, but we made it.”
I nod, because, holy shit, speaking is not something that my brain can handle at the moment. Aiden has been treating me differently. The last few months we have flirted more, but he has never called me baby. And just recently he has started calling me angel. I like it a lot. Is my mind playing tricks on me? Is this really happening?
Aiden leans up and places a tender kiss on my forehead. He opens his door and climbs out, leaving me in my seat unable to speak, unable to comprehend what just happened. It feels important, like our relationship is changing. I know I tend to let my imagination wander and pretend that he wants me. Shit! I may have to break down and talk to Allison about this. I know she will be supportive. I just do not want Liam to find out. I need to talk to my best friend. I know she hates to keep anything from Liam, but surely best friend and future sister-in-law code can trump that on some things. Things like me being in love with their best friend.
I jump at the sound of knocking on my window. It’s Allison. “Hey, lazy bones, let get moving,” she speaks through the glass. Taking one last deep breath to calm my racing heart, I open the door and climb out.
It only takes a couple of trips to get everything unloaded. The guys carry triple what we do, so yeah, that helps. The beach house has five bedrooms. My parents have the master suite downstairs and there are four additional rooms upstairs. Liam carries all of his and Allie’s things into the room he always uses. I choose the room I always claim as mine, and Aiden takes one of the spares. I wish he was sharing with me.
By the time we finish unpacking and fix something to eat, it’s evening. Liam builds a fire in the pit. Aiden brings the chairs out of the storage shed while Allison and I stock up a cooler with beer and wine coolers, of course. The guys had bought the drinks yesterday, preparing for our trip. They even bought us our favorite “girly” drink, Grape Smirnoff. Yum. We carry the cooler down and place it behind one of the chairs away from the fire. Allison runs to Liam, and he catches her easily in his arms, swinging her in circles. I, however, slowly lower myself into a lounge chair watching the fire. I peer out of the corner of my eye as Aiden lowers himself in the chair next to mine. I notice that there are two chairs on the other side of the fire. I wonder if he set them up that way on purpose. GAH! I need to stop thinking that he is trying to get closer! I need to just S-T-O-P!
“Tired?” he asks softly.
“Not too bad. My catnap on the way here helped.” I turn my head and smile at him.
He’s staring at me, but turns his head once he realizes that he’s been busted.
“They’re really happy,” he says, tilting his head towards Liam and Allison.
“Yeah, they really are. I’m happy for them,” I say.
“Me too,” he replies quietly.
Aiden and I sit in silence as we watch the fire. Liam and Allison are curled up on a lounger across from us. All of us are quiet, just enjoying the sounds of the ocean and the cracking of the fire. We remain this way for what seems like hours. Liam and Allie rise and say they are heading in for the night.
“I’m surprised they lasted this long,” Aiden says, laughing softly.
I can’t help but chuckle. “Me either. They held out longer than I would have.” The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. Shit. Shit. Shit. Hopefully Aiden will let it go and not try to dig deeper into the meaning of what I said.
“Do tell,” he says with a smirk. He turns on his side in the lounger to face me.
Yep, so not that lucky.
I turn on my side to face him as well. “You really want to know?” I ask him.
“Yes.”
My eyes find his. I feel like something monumental is happening. I just can’t put my finger on it. I decide to let my word-vomit flow. I can’t scare him away; he’s not even mine.
“Like I said, they held out longer than I would have. I would give anything to have that kind of connection with someone. To always feel loved, safe, and secure. Knowing that at the end of the day, no matter how good or how shitty it was, that one person was there waiting to wrap his arms around me, tell me he loves me, and make love to me.” I feel my face blush on that one. I’m glad that it’s dark, and hopefully the glow of the fire will mask my embarrassment.
Aiden sits quietly, watching me with those chocolate eyes of his. I watch him watching me. He stands up, scoots his lounger closer to mine, and lays back down facing me. We are so close I could reach out and touch him. I don’t get the chance because Aiden cups my face with the palm of his hand. He gently takes his thumb and strokes underneath my eye.
“Do you not feel safe, angel? Did someone hurt you?” he asks with a mix of concern and anger in his voice.
“No,” I say in a strained voice, shaking my head. “It’s not that, it’s just…”
“It’s what?”
“I just want to know what it feels like to be the center of someone’s universe. Someone who chose me to be that person for them. Not my parents or my older brother. But someone who chooses me to share everything intimate in their life. I wish I had someone who loves me and I, in turn, love them, the way that Liam and Allison love each other, is all.” I rush to get the words out to explain. “I just want that connection, to be someone’s more.” I must sound crazy to him.
Aiden sits up and pulls me onto his lounger and into his arms. He pulls me tight against his chest. “You are more; you deserve all of that and more. Please, don’t ever settle for less.”
I feel him kiss the top of my head. I snuggle deeper into his embrace. “You deserve that too, Aiden,” I whisper.
“Maybe so,” he says. “But you are the motherf*cking princess, remember?” he says with a chuckle.
I elbow him in the ribs.
“Hey! Take it easy. I’m just messing with you.” He laughs.
“Serves you right, Mister. Don’t mess with me,” I say, trying to hold back my laughter.
“The fire’s about burnt out. Let’s get you to bed,” he says, releasing me from his embrace.