Jacob sighed. "Then stop worrying about this... I'll get over it."
"I'm just... I'm sorry," Bella said. "I don't know why I would..."
"Trick me into telling you a secret that could have destroyed my tribe?" Jacob hissed then, he really didn't want her to try and explain herself to him.
Bella gasped and shook her head. "No... I couldn't have known the potential danger to your tribe..." she said this as if she was talking to herself. She wouldn't have done that, right?
"No, I suppose you wouldn't know about the treaty." Jacob said, "But still, it's just not like you to use someone like that. And it hurts that it was me that you tricked."
Bella swallowed. "I'm sorry... I don't know what else I can say about that..."
"Oh, Bella," Jacob groaned. "Of course you don't know what to say... we don't even know what was said on the beach... I'm sorry for blaming you... you really haven't done anything to me."
"But..." Bella said, but he cut her off shaking his head.
"Seriously, Bella, drop it," Jacob said. "We're cool now."
"Okay," Bella nodded her head sadly and Jacob rolled his eyes... she so wasn't going to just drop this, but whatever, he wasn't going to think about it anymore.
Ever practical. "And did that convince you?"
"No," she said. "Nothing fit. Most of it was kind of silly. And then - "
She broke off again, and I heard her teeth lock together.
"What?" I demanded. What had she found? What had made sense of the nightmare for her?
Jacob chuckled there, it was a little forced, but it still sounded natural. "You really have this guy on the edge of his seat with all the suspense you're building here."
"I doubt I know what I'm doing," Bella said, her voice a little distant. She really didn't know what she was doing when it came to boys; which was clear enough by the way that she had handled Jacob.
There was a short pause, and then she whispered, "I decided it didn't matter."
Shock froze my thoughts for a half-second, and then it all fit together. Why she'd sent her friends away tonight rather than escape with them. Why she had gotten into my car with me again instead of running, screaming for the police...
Her reactions were always wrong - always completely wrong. She pulled danger toward herself. She invited it.
"Why is he taking that so badly?" Bella asked a little confused. "Is it bad that I've accepted him?"
"Um... I'm not sure," Jacob said thoughtfully. "You know this guy... he always reacts the wrong way," he laughed this time and so did Bella.
"I suppose two wrongs do make a right then," Bella chuckled.
"That's not how the saying goes," Jacob shook his head.
"It didn't matter?" I said through my teeth, anger filling me. How was I supposed to protect someone so...so...so determined to be unprotected?
"No," she said in a low voice that was inexplicably tender. "It doesn't matter to me what you are."
She was impossible.
"And so is he," Bella hissed.
"Doesn't make you stop liking him though, does it?" Jacob said.
"Nope," Bella admitted with a smile.
"You don't care if I'm a monster? If I'm not human?"
"No."
I started to wonder if she was entirely stable.
I supposed that I could arrange for her to receive the best care available...
"I am not crazy, Edward Cullen!" Bella yelled.
"You are yelling at a book right now... that might be considered a bit crazy," Jacob pointed out with barely concealed laughter.
"Shut up!" Bella hissed at him.
Carlisle would have the connections to find her the most skilled doctors, the most talented therapists. Perhaps something could be done to fix whatever it was that was wrong with her, whatever it was that made her content to sit beside a vampire with her heart beating calmly and steadily. I would watch over the facility, naturally, and visit as often as I was allowed...
"Well, then I wouldn't be cured you idiot, because the reason is that I like you!" Bella yelled again.
"Yep... not crazy at all," Jacob really laughed this time and she glared at him furiously. She might have been a fully grown house cat, instead of a kitten with that glare, Jacob mused, laughing harder.
"You're angry," she sighed. "I shouldn't have said anything."
As if her hiding these disturbing tendencies would help either of us.
"No. I'd rather know what you're thinking - even if what you're thinking is insane."
"So I'm wrong again?" she asked, a bit belligerent now.
"She didn't like it when you questioned her sanity, man," Jacob said laughing.
"That's not what I was referring to!" My teeth clenched together again. "'It doesn't matter'!" I repeated in a scathing tone.
She gasped. "I'm right?"
"Does it matter?" I countered.
She took a deep breath. I waited angrily for her answer.
"Not really," she said, her voice composed again. "But I am curious."
"Of course you are," Jacob said.
Not really. It didn't really matter. She didn't care. She knew I was inhuman, a monster, and this didn't really matter to her.